Talk:Tsukumodo:Volume 1 Memories and Notes

It stayed that way until I visited his parents to introduce myself. That was quite the surprise."

(surprise for hideki-san?)

For both of them. But I suppose Hideki-san was surprised because of an additional reason...

My full attention was directed at Etsuko-san's voice and her holding the breath.

( did she hold her breath WHILE speaking? or: she held her breath then spoke, then held it again and so on? anyway, very strange wording)

...sounds strange, indeed. You guessed the meaning right, though: she does it alternately. I can't think of an appropriate wording right now, though.

As you said, I shouldn't be here," he declared and stood up.

(is he reffering to Saki?)

"As you said" is not quite appropriate here. More like, "You're right," because he was referring to their surprise at his being there.

At the same time, the probability that she had left the scrap somewhere and forgotten about it grew. Or perhaps she had lost it while she was tidying things away from her move.

(MB i'm being stupid here, but just to be sure... she might have lost it while arranging her stuff in the new house after she moved into it, correct?) --idiffer 04:15, 3 May 2014 (CDT)

He thinks of two different cases here: one is that she just lost the scrap because of the mess (not necessarily while arranging her stuff, just generally), and the other one is what you mentioned. EusthEnoptEron (talk) 04:27, 3 May 2014 (CDT)

Some TL questions: Sorry to spam the talk page, but it seems that I'm not allowed to edit anything since my IP is an open proxy.

Doesn't "dilligent" only have one "L"? Yet, I remember seeing "dilligent" rather than "diligent".

"By the way, it ate it after moving here, right?" Shouldn't it be "you ate it"?

"As soon as I heard the start call, swiftly flipped around the paper." Shouldn't it be "I swiftly flipped over the paper."?

"Only when I made my purchases, and perhaps to your shop for some advise." Shouldn't "advise" be "advice"?

"Not only me, but it was the same for him" Shouldn't it be "but it was also" since "but..also" always follows "not only"?

I just don't want to have anything to do with someone my mother has severed all contact with... since it's like I were betraying her. And I don't want to betray her any more." Not sure, but "since it's like I were betraying her" is vague in meaning. Does this sentence mean that "not having to do anything with someone my mother has severed all contact with" would be "betraying her"? Isn't the exact opposite intended?

"I felt that this was the bonds between parent and child" Shouldn't it be "this was the bond"?

"Hideki-san offered me to be a new one or rent one, but I insisted on wearing this."

Shouldn't "be" be "buy"?

"She returned carrying a snow-white wedding dress. I'm not versed in wedding dresses, but it looked like a slightly old design." Shouldn't it be "like one of a slightly older design"? "Slightly" is used for comparisons like in the example of "Joe is slightly taller than his brother" so just saying "slightly old" wouldn't make sense unless you were to add "-er" to "old" or if you were to omit "slightly". Also a dress is not a slightly older design but that of a slightly older design.

"I knew you'd say that." "What? Did you want me to praise you?" "No?" "Don't get angry!" Shouldn't "No?" be "No!"?

"I wanted to let her forget "that memory" whatever it was going to take." Shouldn't it be "by doing whatever"?

Thanks a lot for pointing out these errors - I fixed them in the latest revision. A few notes, though:

"Slightly" is used for comparisons

- Are you sure about that? I agree that "design" was used in a wrong way, but I think "slightly" can be used like any other adverb.

Shouldn't "No?" be "No!"?

- the question mark is correct in the sense that it also appeared like that in the original text, but it translates badly into English. It was supposed to sound like a sulky no, so to speak.

"I wanted to let her forget "that memory" whatever it was going to take."

- replaced the part with "no matter what" since "by doing..." would sound a bit weird, IMO.

Anyway, thanks again. :D EusthEnoptEron (talk) 18:35, 21 May 2014 (CDT)