MaruMAːShort-shortsːJuneBrideChampionship

Infiltrated! June Bride Championship of All America

Outside the window it was raining, and it was a rain that didn't look like it was going to stop the next day or the day after.

"We're having a lot of rain."

Yuuri put down two sets of TEA CUPs very gently on the table, and gave a little sigh. Ever since he came to know these cups were made by a craftsperson renowned in the whole of Shin Makoku, he had been extra careful around them.

Conrad had tried to tell him that even if they got broken, he wouldn't be getting any blame. But he only answered gingerly with "not something to be ruined like that" and "that's not the kind of thing you drink from, they should be put on display", and didn't change his timidness towards those tea set items.

So what kind of cups was he normally using back at home? Conrad only began to wonder, before he remembered some clues from his own past experience staying on the Earth.

It was probably a piece of baseball team GOODs. After all, the hardcore baseball fans he'd met in America all did this.

It wasn't just the baseball fans. When it came to their daily necessities, the hardcore football fans and basketball fans and ICE HOCKEY fans were all sticking to GOODs with their beloved TEAMs' LOGOs on them.

Although Conrad couldn't imagine himself to have a life with the □□□□s' LOGO from wakening to sleep and not become weary, but somehow he couldn't help a smile at the thought of Yuuri doing such a thing with enthusiasm either.

"Have some, while it's warm."

"Then I'll do that without reserve."

Yuuri had been struggling at a chance of grasping the skills to make delicious black tea.

His battle with the TEAPOT had carried on and on, with him muttering things like "moment the water boils" and "poured from high above to mix air in" and "JUMPING of the tea leaves".

And it seemed to have started like this.

Apparently, Wolfram said he made terrible tea.

As it was that blunt little brother of his, Conrad imagined his actual words to have been something like "you never had the temperature right making it". It would have been nice if he had just dropped that roundaboutness and said "you're the king, so instead of making tea by yourself just leave it to the servants and sit down" instead.

But that didn't seem to be the only thing on his mind. Yuuri held with both hands the CUP containing the scarcely improved result of his special training (there was too much redness in the tea than should be), and kept looking out of the window.

"Is it bothering you?"

"Eh?"

"The rain."

"Eh?? Uh--- it's not like 'bothering'."

Yuuri hurriedly shook his head. But he looked not really "unbothered".

"But, you know..... in Japan we have a name for this period with this kind of weather, called 'Tsuyu' , um, around June."

"Ah, the RAINY SEASON."

"Right, rainy season. For some reason, when it's this time of the year there're a lot more weddings than usual. Something to do with June Brides."

In fact, it was a mythology-based custom, and thus not specific to Japan. Moreover, in the UK June was often the most pleasant month of the year, so the families of the bride and groom actually wouldn't be as deeply troubled like they'd be in Japan. Conrad hesitated over whether to explain about this or not.

"The extent of it. When it's weekends and holidays there're weddings held in all sorts of places. And when I see that...."

"Ah. You mean it would make you BLUE thinking about absurd things."

"No....not to the point of that."

"Like what would happen to you when Greta gets married."

As if for a moment he was worried about being seen by someone that trusted and followed him, changes happened to Yuuri's expression a second slow. His eyebrows lowered, and his mouth started to form a reverse "V", even tears were coming to his eyes.

"N-not that. I'm not thinking about that."

"....It's okay. You don't need to hide it. But even if you worry about this ahead of time, that is a thing that won't be happening at least in another ten years."

"But how can we know--!? What if she falls in love super early and gives the getting married declaration at sixteen!"

Thinking about it, it was actually fair to say that there was a larger probability to anyone becoming a bride at sixteen than anyone becoming a doting father at sixteen.

But growing up among mazokus, Conrad looked at teenaged youths as still being children.

At this Yuuri pointed his finger at Conrad, and attacked.

"This is a feeling only understandable by dads. Imagine if you had a beloved daughter..... or a beloved son would be okay too. And one day the kid brings a guy over out of the blue and says something like 'thank you for taking care of me till today, daddy, I'm going to marry and live with him' to you, looking all serious! Normally wouldn't you cry at this, like 'uwaaa Greta, why this useless looking dude of all dudes--', wouldn't you!?"

"Couldn't they turn out to be other types than useless dudes?"

"They will be useless no matter what! No matter what kind of men they are they're not good enough for Greta--!"

".......Umm."

Conrad put his hand against his forehead and made indistinct sounds.

This was beyond his imagination.

"This is not feeling very real to me, for I don't have any children......"

"That can't be. Even I have an illegitimate child and I've been unpopular for sixteen years. A popular guy like you could easily have one or two or ten or twenty children hidden in the whole of Shin Makoku! It's hard to believe you don't have any children at all."

"Even if you say so, I have really no idea...."

Yuuri leant over the TABLE. The cup of black tea beside his stomach was in a danger of spilling all over.

"Then! Then it doesn't have to be a daughter. It could be a family member you love very much. Right, a lovely brother would do. What a shock it would be if your lovely BROTHER one day says to you he's getting married!"

Because this was a much more familiar example, Conrad expected it would be easier and tried to imagine again.

Ummm, one day his elder brother decides to get married out of the blue.

"It's not feeling like too much of a shock..... ah, maybe things would depend, on the person he marries."

Having gone so far, Conrad suddenly realized something. The description included the word "lovely", so probably he should have been thinking about Wolfram.

Yuuri held both his hands into fists and waited for Conrad to answer.

"What if Wolf says something like this?"

He imagined. He imagined really hard. He imagined with all his might.

But Conrad's frantically attempted imagination was cut off by the sense of loyalty and a feeling of guilt.

At any rate, though it had happened by accident, it was no other than His Majesty the MAOU right before Conrad's eyes that his lovely younger brother is engaged to. To call His Majesty a useless dude and undeserving of Wolfram was not only a dreadful and disrespecting thought he'd never had, but these were dreadful and disrespecting words he’d never say under any threat.

Conrad answered disconnectedly.

"I would think, they are, quite, suitable for each other."

"What--? What kind of stupid brave face are you putting on! It's because it's a brother right? Because it's a brother and you can't really picture the situation! Then, then whether it's a nephew or a niece or a child from a relative's or friends' family it's okay. Think of a kid that you know from when they were a baby, and have cared for, and know their parents and have probably discussed baby names together, and have given them presents at their every birthday, have lovingly watched over them growing up. And one day this kid suddenly brings a useless dude to you and same as above---!!"

He imagined again. He imagined with the best of his effort. He imagined like it was the plans for an operation on which his life would be depending.

But Conrad's desperately attempted imagination was cut off again, this time by tides of family love and another feeling of guilt.

At any rate, though it had happened by accident, the lovely godson he'd cared about from birth had gotten engaged to his brother. Wolfram was in fact not a useless dude, and to call him undeserving of His Majesty was such an outrageous thing that he wouldn't think to put into his own mouth even in the fever of a fight.

Conrad said with some difficulty.

"I still, tend to, feel happy for them, from my heart."

"What---?"

Yuuri put his fingers through his hair and let out a cry as if to say this was the end of the world.

"You can be so cold-blooded!"

On whom did he think those imaginations were based?

Yuuri didn't look like he had any clue they could have had anything to do with himself. Conrad looked at him and felt stumped and on the edge of becoming disheartened, and tried to bring the topic back to where it originally was.

"B-but one moment, weren't we talking about June Brides? It was about June Brides. Because we traditionally think it's best for wedding ceremonies to be held on a day of good weather, Shin Makoku doesn't have a custom like this. But. But when I was on the Earth I got to cross my path with that of some June Brides."

"Eh? Woah, were you at the wedding of an acquaintance?"

Yuuri had his high spirits back the moment the topic wandered away from his daughter.

"I wasn't actually. But I was brought along by a friend to sneak into something called the June Bride Championship of All America."

"....Why?"

Yuuri looked suspicious at the sudden turn of events.

"Why...I was thinking if you should wish to become a June Bride I needed to be prepared and at least know what those are."

"Isn't it not supposed to matter because mazokus don't have June Brides? Conrad, were you by any chance...."

"You mean….?"

Yuuri went on with a clearly visible amount of suspicion in his eyes.

"Planning to get married on Earth despite being a former prince of Shin Makoku?"

"I-I wasn't."

Despite that, the man had Cäcilie the Love Hunter's passionate blood. You may need to go easy on him.

"So anyhow, I snuck in. With my friend Rodriguez."

"Oh? What did they do at the brides' championship? Were the competitions all orthodox like cooking and cleaning and skills in folding washed clothes?"

"There wasn't very much concerning these basics."

Yuuri's eyes started to shine. His curiosity seemed to be looking up.

"Ah, then was it about skills in handling the mother-in-laws and in doing EXTREME IRONing, or TECHNIQUEs in spotting the husbands' affairs? Were they exchanging experiences about that?"

"I have doubts about the idea of brides who suspect there is an affair from before they get married."

"Then was everything about the speed you can run carrying injured brides without leaving anyone behind, or the right ways to treat a bride by the Treaty of Vienna, or BOOT CAMPs held by devilish wives, were there many of those?"

"Yuuri, that’s starting to sound like GI Jane Bride....."

Yuuri drank from his now-cold tea and whined.

"Then what was it all about--"

"You know, at the June Bride Championship of All America I'd snuck into, there was not a single female bride."

"Eh!? Really, seriously, were they all men!? Woah that's AMERICA. Woah that's the Championship of All America."

"And no one was wearing white wedding dresses either. Instead there were hundreds of men in GRAY uniforms that had come in from all over America."

"Eh--- And?"

Yuuri seemed to have guessed how this was going to end, and his spirits were suddenly dropping. But he tried to stay with Conrad to hear the ending nonetheless. This was something remarkable. “When you listen to someone else, it’s important to keep listening till they finish”. That was his parents' work in his upbringing.

"And here and there the men were shouting 'that’s not enough barrage' and 'go on standby' at each other. Afterwards I asked Rodriguez again, and found out it wasn't a championship for June Brides, but a championship for the BLIGHT."

"Conrad-- Is this a joke you came up with just now---?"

Conrad hurriedly shook his head at the groundless accusation.

"It's not. My friend Rodriguez and I really did sneak into...."

"If you were going to make up a story anyway, it might as well be about seeing Albright and Bush walking down the aisle both wearing WEDDING DRESSes. That's the kind of huge SCALEd lies that feels good to hear."

"No, but it really wasn't a lie...."

Outside the window it was raining, and it was a rain that you couldn’t escape whether you're staying out or inside.

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