MaruMA:Doujinshi3:Story2

WC or NPB?

Takabayashi Tomo

Unpatriotic? What language is that? Is it Japanese? Then, when was the last time that word was used!? Everyone gets verbally abused at school, but for a month I was completely disconnected from "that thing". It's just that I'm a resident of the country of baseball, and I have nothing to contribute to Japanese soccer. At any rate, once "that thing" left all my problems disappeared. All right everyone! Let's go back to professional baseball ! ■

On June 20, Murata Ken was crying.

Even though it was only days before the end-of-term finals, I, who had been lured in by the grass-lot baseball practice annual weekend, stopped by the batting center on the way home, to improve my batting power and then hit a ball at a speed of 120 km. Under the right conditions I can make them reach 130km, but they were playing a video of Matsuzaka and it put me off for some reason.

Almost in complete privacy, because the store staff had retreated to the office, I CHALLENGED myself to CATCH some 'faster than the eye can see' fast-balls. Although my team has some Koshien experience, to be honest, the balls that university students throw are faster than ours.

Since I had ended up all nicely covered in sweat, and had impatiently had a pre-dinner drink (not alcohol, a snack), I dipped into the ofuro to clean the dust off my meats.

I'm really in a good mood.

Since that Soccer World Cup which apparently is a really important EVENT worldwide had finally ended, tomorrow everything would go back to normal. Without the EVENT co-hosted by Japan and Korea, the NPB's pennant race could resume.

And by the way, even though they were forced to change their schedule in June, our Seibu Lions is still moving forward, undefeated. Because of some 'serious jinx' (due to the laws that have remained immutable through the years) I am undoubtedly confident that we'll be number 1 this year.

And that puts me in an even better mood.

The law is the following.

Ever since the team was founded, the league of our Seibu Lions has won every single year that the World Cup was held. Furthermore, 3 out of 5 of all the Central League wins were won by them. Two of those times, they won when a new coach had been appointed for the year, Hirooka and Mori respectively, and also, whenever the now defunct West Germany got second place in the World Cup.

This year, Itou-san was appointed new interim coach for the year, it's a World Cup year and, just a moment ago I heard that Germany ended up in second place, which means....

"Seibu Lions Japan's Number 1"

Saying it out loud put me in the best of moods.

A droplet fell from the ceiling and bounced on my bent knee. Soon it'll be summer and soaking in the tub will be a hassle.

"Say, Yuu-chan."

"Woah!"

The door of the bathroom was slammed opened, and I instinctively put my head under the water up til my nose. The bath water additives mixed in with water went into it.

Mother!? A mother barging into the bathroom while their sixteen-year old son is taking a bath!?

"Should you really be in here?"

"It's just that, it's urgent. You have a phone call from a friend. It's Muraken-kun."

My mother held up a towel, urging me to come out of the tub. But I couldn't come out like that.

"Murata? Then tell him I'm in the tub."

"I won't tell him something so heartless. It sounds pretty serious."

"Serious?"

"That's right. Like the world's ending or something."

That's bad. Maybe he got a bad grade.

I stretched my arm to take the towel and asked my mom to leave.

"Muraken-kun, he'll take it. Mama is really heartbroken now. It's just that Paulo Sousa-sama might announce his retirement. I mean, by all means I want J to come but what do you think, Muraken-kun?"

"What? What are you talking about?"

With some difficulty, I made my mother leave and sat on the washstand with a towel around my waist, putting the wireless phone to my ear.

"What's going on Murata? I was having a really pleasant hot bath.(upset)"

"..... I don't care about hot baths..."

On the other side of the phone, Murata certainly sounded like the world was ending.

"W-What happened? Did they finally realize you were cheating on your tests?"

"That's rude. I can get good grades without doing that."

"Murata... you really are an unpleasant guy without even trying, huh?"

"Rather than saying that, hear me out Shibuyaaaaaa"

It was a sign to return to the main subject.

"Khan..... God Khan lost!"

"Khan? Khan who?" (t/n: doitsu= who; doitsu= Germany)

"That's right. Germany's god-like SUPER SAVER goal keeper"

It wasn't a pun, I was really asking him who he was.

"Calm down, Muraken. Anyone can lose a match. But before you continue, tell me. Are you talking about the World Cup? "

"Of course! What else could I be talking about ?"

"I don't know, like Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan or something"

Several line poles away, Murata was fuming. After releasing three strange grumbling sounds, his voice returned to normal.

"While the whole world was holding their breath, watching the once in four years World Cup finals on the edge of their seats, what in the heck were you doing!? "

I couldn't tell an excited soccer fan that I was at the batting center hitting balls thrown by Matsuzaka (vision).

"Ah... aaaa....uhhm.... I was taking a long bath?"

"Don't lie to me, putting that in the form of a question!"

Apparently, it seems that I'm not a member of this world. But it's estimated that there are about one hundred million people who are not interested in the World Cup.

Mostly in America .

"In other words, you're depressed because Germany lost, right? Well, but it was expected. I mean, from the start you said that they lacked determination and attack power and that they relied too much on the goal keeper..... yeah, I remember you saying something like that last year."

"Me?.... Seibu? It was the Seibu....? Was I talking about the Seibu Lions!? Shibuya, are you trying to change the topic to baseball at a time like this!?"

"No, my bad, my bad."

"Uhhhh.... You being a waste-of-money-and-time baseball idiot can't understand my sadness..... Nghh..."

No way. He's actually crying over something like that? Murata snorted loudly through his nose as his words got stuck in his throat. But, I can't let this make me think poorly of him. I too would cry if the Lion's lost.

"Khan-sama was kinda absentmindedly getting really close to the goal post, you know? It's like he sat there and wouldn't move an inch. He was off...."

"Khan is that goril... no, I mean sergeant looking ol... uh.... man, right?"

I tried to picture him. It was scary.

Was Murata offended? He lowered his voice.

"No, it's fine. You can call him Gorilla or Gori-khan. Because Bundesliga supporters and opponents both throw bananas at him."

Awesome.

"But let me say this to you, if you're calling Khan-sama "old man", then let me remind you your beloved Itou is even older."

"You're angry because I forgot the honorific, huh? It can't be helped, I'll add sergeant-dono after his name. Oh, right! I saw this on the news. A song about Khan-sergeant-dono . What's with the Japanese version? Is it true that "his ass is for men only"?

"..... don't just hear that part!"

"Even so, it's kind of a suspicious cheering song. It's completely different from Itou-san's."

"What's that like?"

"His home base is the fortress of men"

"......................."

We both went silent at the same time.

"................ They're kinda.... similar?"

"S-similar? What ....?"

"Your love love mentor Itou-san and my Khan-sama."

"W-What are you talking about? You don't know anything about this. Isn't it obvious? My mentor is awesome."

"If we're comparing awesomeness, Khan-sama wins."

"What? Well, then I'll ask you this, how many home runs has sergeant-dono hit?"

He doesn't hit! I told myself.

"Well, how many Golden Gloves did he win? How many Best Nine?

"Now you listen Shibuya, you don't play soccer with 9 players. If there are 9 players in a team is because two of them got a RED CARD. Well, sometimes you get games where that happens."

I know that, of course. If I think about it, don't baseball fans know more about soccer than soccer fans about baseball? Even though I'm not interested in soccer, I'm reasonably familiar with the rules.

I know about OFFSIDE, OBSTRUCTION and FREE KICK and such. Good and not so good mangas.

"I know about the tactics of Troussier, "push-up boobs" and " pick-pocketing BRATS".

For some reason, even though I was meeting him halfway, Murata sighed.

"You mean "defensive strategy" and "FLAT three"...... Don't use words you'd say during a stopover in a trip!"

"Well having a FLAT (tire) kinda has to do with trips, right?"

"Even if I tell such an amateur about Khan-sama's greatness, he won't understand. At any rate, he is awesome. No matter where the ball comes from or how they kick it, he always catches it. He never lets it pass him. He jumps and stops them."

"Ah, Itou-san is also good at getting a lead by pitching. Last year, with his Hsu Ming-Chieh's SHOTS, he stroke out almost every BATTER. And then, if they did hit the ball, it sort of bounced on the bat and it went up really high and was easy to catch, they were really WILD PITCHES that didn't allow anyone to score. Honestly, it was awesome. They may not be SAVES but he STROKE OUT lots of players."

"......................."

We both went quiet at the same time again.

T-They.... are kinda similar?

Don't be stupid. Baseball and soccer have nothing in common other than being two main types of shounen manga about ball games. Baseball players don't do strange dances when they score a point, and they don't exchange uniforms if they had a good match. In the first place, they don't have to worry about getting their hair or clothes pulled or tripping and falling down.

"At any rate, the importance of a CATCHER and a goal keeper is completely different. Because a KEEPER doesn't only stop SHOTS, he also instructs the players in his team where they should stand, and he has to aim towards the center of the field when he kicks from the goal area as if it was an ultra-long pass."

"In baseball the CATCHER also instructs the players how to take defensive positions.... but he certainly doesn't throw the ball to the CENTER. He does have to hit second and third runners though."

"......................."

I've gotten used to the silence.

"Anyways, Khan-sama is amazing! He's so amazing that not even the next generations of goal keepers will be able to sit on his throne."

"I-It's what I say about ours."

"Again, what do you mean by 'ours', the Seibu?

"Our Itou-san is also way too awesome, and not only no one in the next generation will surpass him, but in a contest involving all former catchers, I wonder how many of them were also infielders and outfielders......"

"......................."

They are similar!

Hey, hey, wait, wait, let's calm down.

I didn't sit down on the wash stand to discuss the similarities between Itou-san and the sergeant.

"W-Well... you have to let it go, Murata. Because that's the way the world goes, there are winners and losers. Besides if sergeant-dono is so amazing, he will surely win 4 years from now. Today, you have to admit defeat, and starting tomorrow, you have to return to professional baseball. Come with me and cheer for the Seibu Lions. There's no doubt that they will become Japan's number 1 this year"

"........ What an assertion. Why are you so sure?"

"Ehh~? It's because they came out second, so victory is ensured."

"What!?"

"Didn't you know? Every time there's a new interim coach for the year, and every time that Germany gets second place on the World Cup, the Seibu Lions always become Japan's number 1. Nakagawa, Juushiro said so, and after looking into it, I believe this to be true."

"What did you say? No way, Shibuya. You weren't hoping for Germany to be defeated because of that, right?"

"That's rude. Seibu can get win without doing that."

Even without cheating, they can get lots of points.

"What you're saying is that Germany didn't have a chance to win the cup, because the Seibu would win, because they had a new coach!?"

"You're overthinking this."

"Even so, there's no way such a rigid rule would exist..... wait"

Murata's tone became serious.

"If this happens during every World Cup, does it mean that the law will be activated again in four years? Germany will be the host of the next World Cup. What if they can't win then!?"

"In four years? Well, that's up to Itou-san."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, according to the "law" in four years from now, if the Seibu gets a new coach that year, then Germany will certainly end up in second place. And then, the Seibu will become Japan's number 1. Which means that whether or not Germany wins is up to Itou-san."

"Whaaaaaaaat!? That's absurd!"

"It's just that... it will all be determined by the next coach. If my mentor and interim coach on the active player list, decides to retire the year before that, then Ihara-san will make him coach. He's probably just taking the job of interim coach this year to get used to it..."

"H-How old is Itou-san?"

"He'll be 40 this year."

"I-Isn't that like really old?"

"Maybe for other players, but my mentor is really active and lively!"

"L-lively? Say, isn't there a chance that he'll retire before that......?"

I answered flatly.

"Nope"

Only I know how active a CATCHER that plays defense and offense has to be.

"Which means that if he continues his active life as a player, he'll have to postpone becoming the official coach?"

"It seems so, huh? Well.... if I pray really hard, I think he might keep playing til he's 45."

I wonder about that. Is there a chance that Germany's goal keeper would still be playing at 45? Even though I said that the difficulty of the games is different, training more than 2 hours a day, every day, is really tough.

As if plotting something on the other side of the phone, Murata started laughing like a MAD scientist.

"Huhu.... huhuhuhu...... praying is kind of an uncertain strategy, it's not good enough."

"Not good enough?"

"..... If this is how it is, then Itou-san needs the entire country to cheer for him to continue playing. In order to win the World Cup, I'll let dust cover my German, sports, and science magazines, and I'll stop Itou-san's retirement!

"Mu- Murata? Really, how many people ....?"

"I'll call in the best professionals in the country, and acquire state-of-the-art equipment. First I'll start by re-shaping his body! Shibuya, where should I start?

Itou-san currently has two weak points. Shoulders, shoulders, shoulders, shoulders.......

"................ his hair"

"All right, I get it! Roger that! I'll invite Professor Swanson, an authority in hair and scalps, and he'll give him a head full of hair in no time! wah....."

I wanted to ask him if it was a specialist in male wigs, but before I could say anything Murata had already hung up the phone.

I suddenly got a shiver down my spine. I'm going back into the tub to fight the cold. While stepping on the mat, and throwing the towel away, I imagined the "head full of hair".

Itou-san, you're even more handsome!

What if that really happens tomorrow? What if professor Swanson shows up at the Seibu Dome? I have to confirm whether that will happen or not.

All right everyone, let's go back to professional baseball !

WC or NPB? ■

Back to Story 1

Return to MA Series

Forward to Story 3