Maria-sama ga Miteru:Volume30 Chapter6

Distant Desire

Part 1.

Let's go on the Ferris wheel.

That's what Shimako-san had said.

She hadn't said, "Would you like to." She'd said, "Let's." Then Shimako-san took hold of Noriko's hand and they joined the end of the queue.

"Are you okay with heights, Noriko?"

"… Usually."

"Right. You're strong."

"Usually I'm scared, was what I was going to say."

"Oh, you."

Noriko thought that she should have been the one delivering that last line. It didn't seem like Shimako-san had a love of heights, based on the way she was talking, so why had she deliberately chosen the Ferris wheel?

"Is this some sort of challenge you've set for yourself, Shimako-san?"

They'd been on the roller-coaster just before the Ferris wheel. And the go-carts before that.

In terms of speed and acceleration it wasn't like those other two. Shimako-san's shrieks, whether they were of joy or terror, had come to an end. Noriko thought she may have been the first person ever to hear Shimako-san's voice raised so loud.

Despite all that, and for reasons that she didn't fully comprehend, Noriko still had the same gloomy expression on her face. She let out a sigh. Shimako-san herself had said, "It's not that big a deal," so it was foolish of Noriko to let it drag her down.

"It could be."

Shimako-san looked up into the clear blue sky, then returned her gaze to Noriko.

"Perhaps it's because I'm with you, Noriko."

"But this isn't the sort of challenge I'd set for myself."

"That's not what I meant. Because I'm with you, I feel like I can do these things. So we should try and conquer all sorts of things."

"And by all sorts of things, you mean things you're not good at?"

"I can't really say whether or not I'm good at them. I haven't been to an amusement park before."

"Not even when you were young?"

"Not even then. I never asked my parents to take me to an amusement park, because I never felt enough of a desire to come to one."

Shimako-san laughed softly.

"So that's how it was?"

"How about you Noriko? Did you come here often?"

"Well, it's not like we were here all the time. It was mainly because of my older sister."

In Noriko's case, she didn't have to be assertive because her older sister would badger their parents about going, so occasionally they'd go to the amusement park. The days that her public servant father and school teacher mother had off lined up exactly, so on Sunday they would all go somewhere together as a family.

"Ah. I suppose that happens when you have two siblings about the same age. In contrast, my older brother left home when I was young and, since my father's the chief priest at our temple, Sundays aren't really days off. So a daughter like myself fitted in perfectly."

Even after their heart-to-heart talk earlier, Shimako-san still talked about her family with the same tone of voice as always. It really was "not a big deal."

"Ah."

Shimako-san's gaze had absently wandered forwards, and then she suddenly hung her head in shame. Noriko was about to turn forward to see what had happened when Shimako-san grabbed her hand, stopping her.

"…"

But, she hadn't made it in time and Noriko had seen. The couple standing in line in front of them were kissing, unconcerned about the fact that they were out in public.

Noriko didn't think that she had done anything wrong, so didn't see the necessity to avert her eyes. She considered staring at the couple until they stopped what they were doing out of embarrassment, but relented out of deference to the way Shimako-san let her innocent gaze drop.

At any rate, standing right behind Noriko and Shimako-san were three grade school boys, and the exhibition came to an end surprisingly quickly due to them pointing at the couple and calling out, "They're kissing," and "Kissy-kissy."

The boys were probably brothers. They were different heights, but their faces all looked similar.

"That's what our mom said."

"Aunty didn't say that at all."

Listening in to their conversation, it became apparent that two of the boys were brothers, and the third was a cousin.

Lined up behind the boys was an elderly man and woman. Were they husband and wife? Or companions? It seemed unlikely, but they could be siblings. The surprisingly energetic seventy-year old gentleman was expertly escorting the cane-carrying lady.

So then, what kind of relationship would the people around them think they had? Noriko suddenly found herself wondering this.

Friends? Sisters? Relatives? People that got along well together? Or two girls that were part of a large group that came here today and had decided to go on the Ferris wheel together even though they didn't really like each other?

They weren't quarreling, but people could definitely get that impression from Noriko's glum expression. Still, Noriko thought it was better than a forced, meaningless smile. And they were holding hands, after Shimako-san had clasped Noriko's hand.

After boarding the Ferris wheel and sitting down facing each other they both looked out the window. As they ascended, the figures of the people on the ground became corresponding smaller.

"The people, they're so small."

Shimako-san said what Noriko was thinking, before Noriko had the chance to say it.

"As the daughter of a temple priest, it was always tough on me when it came to keeping secrets."

The amusement park looked like a miniature garden. The mountain, the lake, the castle and the roofs of the various buildings were all visible. The people down below looked like tiny insects, although they would each be laughing, or crying, or angry, etc.

All of that in such a tiny container. Pondering this, Noriko thought that perhaps people's problems were also that tiny, after all.

"And now?"

Noriko asked. Shimako-san responded immediately with, "I'm happy."

"Because I have my darling Noriko by my side."

At that moment, the capsule they shared reached its highest point.

For the first time, Noriko felt that the words Shimako-san had said, that "It's not that big a deal," weren't some kind of justification, but her true feelings.

Part 2.

On-board the steamship, the wind washed over them pleasantly.

As she brushed the stray curls of hair from her face, Shouko heard the person standing beside her say, "Click."

It wasn't the sound of a shutter, it was a voice.

Shouko turned her head and there was Tsutako-sama, smiling at her through a rectangular frame she had made with the thumb and forefinger of both her hands.

"What are you doing?"

"Taking a photo."

"Huh?"

"Even though no physical copy will ever exist, the photo I just took of you will remain in my memory."

At some point Tsutako-sama had stopped searching for, and being disappointed when she didn't find, the camera that wasn't there. Rather than forgetting about the camera, Tsutako-sama seemed to be strangely reveling in the fact that she couldn't use one.

"At first it was a pain. But once I got over the withdrawal symptoms, it was surprisingly comfortable."

Tsutako-sama said, suddenly and lightly. Even without her camera, she was just as interesting as ever.

"And Yumi-san and the others didn't say anything, right? About me not bringing a camera. That meant a lot."

Tsutako-sama said, turning her finger-frame towards the land. Although she probably wasn't going to find Rosa Chinensis en bouton, no matter which direction she pointed at.

"It meant a lot that they didn't say anything?"

Shouko asked. She knew how something that was said could stay with you, but couldn't understand the opposite. Then Tsutako-sama lowered her hands and looked at her.

"Well, outside of photography, I don't really have a lot of self-confidence."

"Huh?"

"At school, I like taking photos of other students. So whenever there's some kind of event and they invite me, I'm happy. And everyone really enjoys the pictures I take. To a degree, I've increased my value by playing the role of a photographer, and it's usually how I communicate with other students. Basically, by taking photos I've made my school life run smoother. That's why I touch my camera whenever I have a spare moment. Having it by my side gives me peace of mind. So for me, the camera is like Linus' blanket."

As she listened to this, Shouko was filled with disbelief. Tsutako-sama always looked so magnificent and full of confidence, and that was how Shouko saw her.

"So my uncle may have made that bet with me because he was more worried than I was."

"He was worried?"

"About whether or not I'd be alright without a camera."

Suffering the consequences of relying too heavily on her camera, Tsutako-sama smiled. Now that her camera had been taken away from her, she could be herself. What did she think about that?

"You didn't bring your camera with you, right Shouko-chan? When I heard that, a part of me was so envious. I thought, 'Ahh, Shouko-chan's so strong.'"

"…"

Tsutako-sama had been thinking these thoughts while Shouko had been depressed about being a photography club member who forgot her camera. It was unimaginable.

"But Yumi-san didn't say anything. Or, rather, she probably didn't even notice that I didn't have my camera. She can be a bit of an airhead."

"And being an airhead's a good thing?"

"Yep, it is. At least for me, right now. Because, after all, it's proof that my doubts were baseless, right? To Yumi-san, I was still myself whether or not I had my camera with me. So she had invited me not as a photographer, but as a friend."

"Why were you using Rosa Chinensis en bouton as your reference point?"

Shouko looked puzzled.

Certainly, Tsutako-sama and Rosa Chinensis en bouton were classmates, so they would know each other well. But she was also classmates with Rosa Foetida en bouton, and had been in the same class as Rosa Gigantea in first-year. So what made Rosa Chinensis en bouton special? There was a certain amount of jealousy in the question.

"Well, the Yellow and White Rose sisters were wrapped up in their own affairs all morning, right? They wouldn't have noticed anything going on with anyone else."

"Huh, what happened with the Yellow and White Rose sisters?"

Tsutako-sama spoke as though it were common knowledge, but this was the first Shouko had heard of it.

"I don't know the details, but I'm fairly sure something was going on. Couldn't you tell just by looking at them?"

Now that she had been asked, Shouko reviewed her memory of what had happened earlier this morning but couldn't find anything unusual. However.

"… I was caught up in my own affairs too."

"I thought as much."

Tsutako-sama grinned at her. While Shouko had been nervously looking at Tsutako-sama, Tsutako-sama had been looking right through her.

"It looks like Rosa Chinensis was the only one who noticed, and she didn't presume to say anything. But she's the exact opposite of Yumi-san, so she would have decided not to say anything only after carefully thinking it through."

Tsutako-sama closed her eyes, finding pleasure in the wind blowing against her.

"Why do you think that?"

The response to Shouko's question was, "That's just how she is."

Tsutako-sama seemed to think that Shouko was inquiring about Rosa Chinensis, when really she was asking about Tsutako-sama herself.

"So, rather than being disappointed, maybe it's a good thing that my camera broke."

Their boat ride would soon be coming to an end.

"If I had my camera with me, I'd be constantly swinging it around, taking photos, so don't think I'd be able to enjoy myself as fully as I have."

Tsutako-sama looked over at Shouko.

"The teacup ride with Rei-sama was fun, wasn't it."

"Yeah."

Her smile had burst free as they spun around. Certainly, if Tsutako-sama had had her camera with her then Shouko probably wouldn't have seen that unguarded smiling face.

Which was why Shouko believed the words of Tsutako-sama's uncle, that this was a decree from the gods.

Part 3.

Yumi-san's group were browsing in the gift-shop.

"Why don't we go and have a look too?"

Rei-chan started to walk forwards, but Yoshino grabbed the hem of her coat, stopping her.

"What's wrong?"

Yoshino thought, "I'm supposed to be the one saying that." For Rei-chan, Yoshino's drunken retching after the teacup ride seemed to have defined some kind of boundary, blowing away their earlier disagreement. She had reverted back to the usual, kind Rei-chan, as though nothing had happened.

Yoshino thought it would be better for her to apologize while she still wasn't feeling well, and away from the others. If Rei-chan had been anticipating this, then she would have responded smoothly. But Rei-chan had been reset back to normal and seemed to have completely forgotten about making up. Consequently, Yoshino hadn't yet found the right time to make the apology that she had told Sachiko-sama she would, since it was hard for her to broach the topic.

"I want to go on that ride."

Having said that much, Yoshino wondered what she should do next. There wasn't really any ride she wanted to go on. She was just using that as a pretext for spending some time alone with Rei-chan.

"Which one?"

Rei-chan frowned.

"You can't go on anything too fast."

"I know."

Now all she had to do was think of some docile ride. As soon as possible.

"You know, that one, that one."

As she struggled to think of one, Yoshino desperately tried to give the impression that she knew, but just couldn't remember its name. The roller-coaster was no good, the teacup ride was preposterous, the haunted house wasn't the kind of place you'd go twice in one day, and the arcade wasn't really what you'd call a ride.

"Ummm... that slow boat-ride around the world."

At her wit's end, she couldn't even name the ride. How the mighty had fallen.

"That should be fine. But didn't you say that you weren't going to go on that?"

That was true. Yesterday, on the way home, Yoshino had smiled as she completely dismissed Rei-chan's very feminine interest in the boat ride that sailed past displays of dolls from various countries. "I'm not some little child," was what she'd said.

"I changed my mind."

Just one more push and she'd be fine. Even now, Yoshino didn't really want to go on that boat ride, but if she pulled out at this point things would only get more complicated.

"Sachiko. We're heading off on our own."

Rei-chan raised her voice so that Sachiko-sama, about 50 metres ahead of them, could hear.

"Understood. Are you going to watch the fireworks?"

Sachiko-sama turned around and fired back, in an equally loud voice.

"Yeah, that's the plan."

So, see you then. They waved farewell, then Yoshino and Rei-chan headed off towards that slow boat ride.

As they held hands, Yoshino thought, "Just hold on a bit longer, Rei-chan.".

As we ride on the boat past those dolls from various countries that you like, I'll tell you properly.

About Nana.

Afterward, I'll say the 'Sorry,' that I should have said earlier.

Part 4.

There were a number of interlinked shops selling souvenirs and character figures clustered around the main entrance.

"Oh, Yumi-san."

Tsutako-san just happened to be browsing inside the store Yumi had innocently wandered into. Naturally, Shouko-chan was with her as well.

"Are you buying a souvenir for your family, Tsutako-san?"

She was holding a cookie tin in her right hand and a box of chocolates in her left hand, apparently trying to decide between the two.

"Not for my family. These are for my uncle."

"Your uncle … ?"

Why would she be buying something for her uncle, but not for her family? Was he someone who had never stopped loving the park's characters, or a figurine collector? It seemed unlikely, but maybe he was constantly on the lookout for new sweets? Guessing Yumi's questions, Tsutako-san supplied the answer:

"He's repairing my camera, so this is just a thank-you gift."

"Oh? Did you break your camera, Tsutako-san?"

"Yeah. Just before I came here. So I haven't had my camera all day."

"Ah, really!?"

As Yumi's voice rose, Shouko-chan mysteriously convulsed with laughter. It was unclear what was tickling her funny-bone, but she was laughing so hard she grasped her stomach. Shouko-chan desperately tried to stifle her laughter, probably considering it to be rude, but that just seemed to set off another burst.

"Excuse me."

Shouko-chan left the store, still laughing.

"What happened to Shouko-chan?"

"Who knows?"

Tsutako-san said, then returned to choosing a gift for her uncle. Even though she probably did know what caused Shouko-chan to start laughing.

"Yumi."

Sachiko-sama appeared. They had become separated as they browsed the spacious store. Kashiwagi-san and Yuuki were somewhere in the shop too. Since Kashiwagi-san was so tall and conspicuous, he was easy to spot inside the store and served as a convenient landmark. Obviously finding something funny, the two guys were pointing and guffawing.

"What do you think about these?"

Sachiko-sama was holding two key-chains featuring the bear mascots, one in each hand. In her right hand was the older bear, in her left hand the younger one. Twin bears.

"There's a cute little bag over there too. I could get the purple one and you could get the pink one. What do you think about that, Yumi?"

Her onee-sama was going to buy them a matching pair of items from the amusement park's gift-shop. It was a promise that had been carried over from their autumn visit.

"Either one is good."

Her onee-sama was buying her something, and on top of that they'd both have a matching set, so Yumi was delighted no matter what it was.

"Saying either one is good doesn't help me. I asked because I was having trouble deciding."

Indeed, that seemed to be the case. So Yumi said the first thing that popped into her head:

"Then how about buying some candy?"

"Candy?"

Sachiko-sama stared back at Yumi, as though she'd just been bitten by a fox.

"It's okay to get something that disappears after you've eaten it."

"You don't want something to commemorate today?"

"Even when there's nothing left, we'll still remember it. The delicious memory will always remain, don't you agree?"

Yumi reflected on how her onee-sama might react to the impertinent suggestion she had just made. Perhaps something along the lines of, "Even though I went to all the effort of finding matching items, and tried my hardest to come to a decision. You'd throw all that effort away and ask for sweets."

What was her onee-sama thinking about? Worried about the response she would receive, Yumi cast her eyes downward, as though she were looking at some of the merchandise.

The shop was fairly busy, now that the day was turning to evening.

"That's true."

Sachiko-sama eventually said.

"Even though I hadn't considered it until now, it's a good idea."

Tsutako-san had apparently been straining hard to listen and quietly said, "Is that really okay?" which was kind of odd.

"Tsutako-sama. How about this?"

Her fit of laughter apparently over, Shouko-chan had returned. When she realized that Sachiko-sama was also present she bowed slightly and greeted her with, "Gokigenyou," before turning back to Tsutako-san and showing her what she had brought.

"Don't you think it's perfect for your uncle?"

Yumi made her way over to Tsutako-san so she could sneak a peak at what was there too. At first glance it looked like a disposable camera. But then the word "Chocolate" printed on the packaging jumped out at her.

Tsutako-san's shoulders started to shake.

"When I return the camera he loaned me for today, how about I put this in the case instead?"

"You could. He'll be surprised."

Tsutako-san and Shouko-chan giggled together, like a pair of naughty schoolboys contemplating a prank. It didn't seem like they were buying this as a gift to thank Tsutako-san's uncle for repairing her camera. And what was that about a camera he had apparently loaned Tsutako-san?

"Say."

There was another person looking at the photography club duo with the same faintly puzzled expression. However, she hadn't heard the key phrases, 'camera repairs' or 'thank-you gift.'

"I couldn't help but overhear your conversation Tsutako-san. If you had a camera with you today, why didn't you take any photographs?"

Sachiko-sama's innocent question seemed to tickle Shouko-chan's funny-bone once more.

"Excuse me."

Pushing the chocolate disposable camera lookalike into Tsutako-san's hands, Shouko-chan once more made for the exit.

"What happened to Shouko-chan? Did I say something strange?"

Unable to get away with just saying, "Who knows?" this time, Tsutako-san followed that up with the equally incomprehensible, "She seems to be quite sensitive today."

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