Boku wa tomodachi ga sukunai:Volume5 Amusement Park ~ Vomit Chapter ~

The Amusement Park ~Vomit Chapter~

It was 11:30 a.m. when we'd all gathered up again and decided to go get some food at one of the restaurants in the park.

Every single place to eat in here was pretty expensive, and I would've rather just made my own lunch, but it would've been a waste of time, since you aren't allowed to bring any food or drinks in with you.

Anyway, Yozora, Maria, and I decided to get curry, Sena wanted yakisoba, Kobato wanted a hamburger patty set, Yukimura picked plain udon, and Rika ordered mabodofu.

"Hey, what'd you guys all ride while we were gone?"

I asked, to which Yozora replied, "...Nothing," with an unhappy look on her face.

"Nothing?"

"I was reading a book on the bench the whole time."

"Again!?"

"...Shut up. I like reading alone."

Yozora said, as though she were pouting a little bit.

If this is how she was gonna end up, I should've done something with her instead...

"Rika rode the merry-go-round about ten times."

I was surprised as to why Rika would do that.

"T-ten times...? Did you like the merry-go-round that much?"

"No. Honestly, it's a little weird. The feeling you get when you ride it isn't anything special, but it slowly builds up, and right as you think to yourself 'Ah, I can cum like this! Here it comes―― I'm about to cum!' the ride ends. Just three more minutes is all I needed..."

"Just what the hell were you trying to accomplish!?"

"Rika was testing to see whether or not she could use it the same way she uses her adult merry-go-round."

T-this girl is so...

"I managed to get pretty close on my last ride... but in the end, I couldn't do it. As a result, Rika is currently quite sexually frustrated. That is to say, I'm incredibly horny."

All I could do was get creeped out by this gigantic pervert.

"Umm, so Maria, what'd you and Yukimura do?"

"I ate hot dogs!"

Maria answered, full of energy.

"Oh? Did Yukimura buy them for you?"

"Yeah!"

Maria nodded, and then added,

"Also, also~ I had popcorn~, and a crepe~, and a hamburger~, and shaved ice~, and takoyaki~, and ice cream too!"

Just how much did she eat, for God's sake?

"...Was it good?"

"Yeah!!"

I couldn't say anything to that big smile on her face.

"I see... Sorry Yukimura, for making you pay for all that..."

"Do not be absurd. It is an honor to be given the task of accompanying your little sister."

Yukimura said, in his normal tone of voice.

A silver haired little girl eating food from all over the park accompanied by a maid―― I wonder if people who saw them thought Maria was a princess or something.

"Little girls and hot dogs certainly make for a sexy combination, don't they?"

"You can be quiet now."

I quickly retorted to Rika without a moment's delay.

We spent the next few moments talking like that, and before long our food was brought to us.

We all ordered a bunch of different stuff, but I'm glad they brought it all out at once.

"Yay~ curry~! Ahaha, the curry looks just like a pile of po――"

"I may have to kill you depending on how you finish that sentence."

"Po... Poerfectly cooked meat and vegetables!"

"...Good."

After that little exchange, Maria and Yozora began eating their curry.

"Ahaha, this curry is so good! It's so weird how good it tastes when it looks like a pile of poop~!"

"...Maria, I'm going to kill you later."

I followed their lead, and scooped some curry into my mouth.

...It didn't taste good or bad; it was just your typical pork curry. I can't believe this cost me 1,000 yen.

"Kodaka-senpai, you're making a scary face."

Said Rika, dumping tabasco sauce onto her mabodofu.

"Ah, sorry, it's nothing... Wait, isn't that a little too much sauce!?"

The mabodofu Rika had ordered already looked like it was on fire the way it came.

Putting tabasco sauce on top of that gives me the chills.

I looked at her, dumbfounded, and before long Rika's forehead broke out into a sweat.

"Hafuuuu~~ Rika loves a good hot and spicy lunch. Did you know, Senpai? Spiciness isn't a taste, it's actually a form of pain. Ah, the double pain of heat and spiciness! Hawah, it's so hot, it hurts, please give me more pain! Gahh Gahh Haa Haa..."

Rika ate her ridiculously spicy mabodofu with a look of ecstasy on her face.

Sena and Kobato, on the other hand, were fully devoted to devouring their yakisoba and hamburger patty respectively.

Yukimura was expressionless even when eating, slurping each noodle one by one.

...Now that I think about it, this is actually the first time all seven of us have gotten together and eaten out at a restaurant like this.

Although we did eat together over summer break at the training camp.

It kinda feels like we're a group of friends who stopped by a fast food joint or something on the way home from school.

"What is it, Kodaka? That grin of yours is disgusting."

Yozora said, looking at me with one eye half-open.

"I-it's nothing. Anyway, what do you wanna do after we eat?"

"I know!"

Maria threw her hand up energetically.

"Go for it."

"Everything!"

"That's impossible. Let's start with what you want to do the most."

"Ehhh? Ok, let's go to the crepe stand then!"

"That's what you want to do most!? Wait, how much have you eaten today anyway!?"

I was seriously taken aback by her gluttonous appetite.

"? But crepes are really good. Don't you think so too?"

Maria tilted her head in confusion.

"...You can have another snack after three. We've got these free passes, so let's use 'em."

"Hmmm... Ok, then I wanna ride The Black Dragon!"

"Uu..."

I'm guessing everyone remembered the fear from earlier, because they all cringed.

"Let's give The Black Dragon a rest for today... It's too scary. Ok?"

I was looking for some support from the rest of the club members, when all of a sudden,

"W-well, you might've been scared, but I was totally fine! I could ride it one more time no problem! Rather, I want to go ride it again! But I guess I'll skip it if you're all too scared~!"

Sena said, trying to act tough.

...Why can't you ever just be honest about this stuff...

"Hmph... Quit bluffing, Meat. You looked like you were about to die earlier."

A bitter smile rose to Yozora's face, and Sena's stiffened in return.

"Haa? You're the one who was so scared you were shaking like a leaf."

"Wha...!? I-I did no such thing! I was completely fine!"

Now even Yozora's trying to act tough.

"Hmph, I wonder about that. I know you were crying like a little girl when we rode it before!"

"What nonsense... You're the one who was crying, fish meat."

"'Kyaaa.'"

Sena imitated Yozora screaming in a monotone voice, causing Yozora's face to go bright red.

I certainly do think I heard Yozora go "Kyaaa" when we rode The Black Dragon in a normal, girly high pitched voice you'd never have thought would come from her, considering how deep her voice usually is.

It was so normal for a girl her age, I would've thought it was just one of the other female passengers if it weren't for her and Sena sitting up in front.

"I can still hear your scream perfectly in my head. Your crying voice as you went 'Kyaaa' - 'Kyaaa' - 'Kyaaa!’ - 'Kyaaa, Mommy~' Ahaha, Yozora-chan, you're so c~u~t~e~ when you cry for mommy like a widdle baby! Gyahahaha!"

Sena tried to rile Yozora up with a strangely provocative expression and tone of voice.

"Gh... A-are you sure your memory isn't mistaken? Hmph, I guess that's what you get when you're dealing with a zombie meat woman who's got crap for brains..."

Yozora launched a counterattack, but it's a bona fide fact that she was screaming and crying before, so it didn't have much force behind it.

"Pfffft! Look evwybody, widdle crybaby Yozora-tan is trying to say something! Bhyahya!"

"Kgghh...! Y-you cried too, you stupid Meat!"

"I-I-I-I-I-I didn't cry. What are you talking about!?"

"Hmph, don't lie. Your eyes were red after crying so much when we fell. And besides, I know that you didn't just cry... you also wet your pants a little!"

"W-w-w-w-why do you kno-... A-a-a-as if I did that! Are you retarded!?"

Sena denied it with a beet red face.

Why did she stutter there...?

"Eh... Meat, did you really...?"

Yozora made a seriously creeped out face.

"O-o-o-o-o-of course not! That stupid little roller coaster wasn't scary at all! In fact, it was so boring I wanted to fall asleep! Actually, how do we know that you didn't wet your pants!?"

"Hmph, it hurts watching you make all these excuses, you rotten piece of ammonia-smelling Meat!"

"'Kyaaa.'"

"Agh...!!"

Yozora started trembling all over.

"T-then prove it! Ride The Black Dragon again without getting scared at all!"

"Fine with me! And you're coming with! I'll be so bored on it I'll even have time to take a picture of you bawling your eyes out! You can't make any more excuses once I've got it on film, now can you!?"

"Hmph, very well. That thing is as easy for me to ride as the train to school. I've got no reason to cry on something like that at all!"

"Yozora, weren't you really bad at riding the train when it's crowded?"

I shot out a quick quip at Yozora.

"What was that!?"

"...Nothing at all, ma'am."

I wonder if I can get Yozora and Sena to stop scaring people into silence with that look of theirs.

"...That aside, Meat, did you even bring a camera with you?"

"Heheh, I've been hiding it in this pocket all along."

"? Why would you go out of your way to hide it...?"

"W-who cares about that? It doesn't matter..."

"...?"

Sena hurriedly tried to change the subject as Yozora stood there, honestly confused.

That Sena, she couldn't have been taking peep shots of Yozora today too, right...? ...No, what am I saying, she probably was...

Anyway, that's how we ended up where we are now.

Yozora and Sena both agreed to go ride The Black Dragon again after lunch.

By the way, I firmly refused to join them on their trip, and even Maria, who wanted to ride it again said, "I want to ride it again, but I'd rather be with Onii-chan!" and so, ended up coming with me.

Rika, Yukimura, and Kobato were also tagging along with me.

...I remembered the time we all went to karaoke together while eating my neither good nor bad curry.

☺

The five of us went off to do our own thing after we all finished eating lunch, leaving Sena and Yozora to ride The Black Dragon.

We figured we'd just go with whatever we saw nearby that looked fun.

The first thing we rode was a thrill ride called "The Viking" modeled after a pirate ship. It was pretty big, like everything else in this park, and went up fairly high too.

That said, a big ship that just rocks back and forth is nowhere near as abusive as The Black Dragon. In fact, it actually feels kinda refreshing.

"Ahahahaha~! We're so high up! Look how high up we are~! Being up high is so much fun~!"

Maria was in just as good a mood as she was on The Black Dragon.

"...Senpai, I don't feel too good."

Next to me was Rika, whose face had gone pale.

"Wh- What's wrong!?"

"I... It feels like I'm sea... sick."

"H-how can you get seasick when we're on land!? A-anyway, just hold it in! It's almost over!"

"Uuuu..."

............

......

...Rika managed to hold it in until the ride ended.

...Phew... That was one thrill I didn't see coming...

☺

Next we decided to ride the free fall.

The main idea is simple really, all you do is go up and then it drops you, and honestly speaking, this is the second worst ride for me after The Black Dragon, but I had to ride it since Rika, Maria, and Kobato all said they wanted to.

"Aniki, I wish you the best of luck."

I got strapped in to the seat, and then the lift started to bring us up.

By the way, there are only four seats per ride, so Yukimura had to go without us on the next one.

We got farther and farther away from the ground, along with an unsettling vibration coming from the lift.

It feels like I'm about to be executed or something.

"Ahahahaha~! We're so high up! Look how high up we are~! Being up high is so much fun~!"

Maria was enjoying herself, as usual.

...So you don't care what it is, as long as you get to go up high, do you?

After we reached the top of the lift, our seats were pushed out away from it―――― and then we fell.

"Nuowamuahhhhh!?"

I let out a pathetic shriek.

"Ahahahahaha!"

Maria was exploding with laughter.

".........!"

Kobato had her eyes shut tight.

"Fuck you, gravity! Fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck!!"

Rika switched into her other weird personality I saw back on The Black Dragon.

By the way, the “fucks” above ↑ were all said within about a second.

As we waited at the exit for Yukimura, Rika murmured something with a dead look in her eyes.

"...This isn't something civilized people enjoy. The only ones who can ride that thing and enjoy it are savages."

"Ahahahaha, that free fall was super fun~! Going up high and then falling was so fun~! Hey~ hey~ Onii-chan, wanna ride it again!? Do you!?"

"Shut your mouth, you damn dirty savage!!"

"Gyaahhhhh!?"

Rika looked pissed as she opened her eyes wide and shouted at Maria.

If I had to say, Rika looks more like the real savage here.

"......Rika is going to live in space when she grows up. Gravity can go eat shit."

"I see. I hope you're happy up there."

"Senpai, come live with me in space."

"No thanks."

"Ehhh~ Come on, let's purge the world of all these Neanderthals and their precious gravity~ We could drop a space colony on them or something~"

"Maybe, if I feel like it."

Yukimura came out of the exit just as I'd finished dealing with Rika spouting nonsense in a voice that sounded like a kid begging his mom for some candy.

He was as expressionless as always, but his eyes didn't seem to have much life in them.

"...Are you ok?"

"...It felt as though I were Rokusuke Keyamura."

"I see... it must've been rough."

...Knowing Yukimura, that was probably the name of some general from the Sengoku Era, but I didn't know the name, so I just gave him a vague reply.

☺

Going on three thrill rides in a row would've been a little bit much, so we headed for the haunted house next.

It was a tiny, Japanese-style mansion sitting by itself in a corner of the park, and the sign board hanging down from it had "Haunted House" written in eerie-looking letters.

We were the only ones there, and hence, managed to get in right away.

This was the first time I'd ever been in a haunted house, but, how to put it, it's even more shoddy than I thought it'd be.

The monsters consisted of chopped off heads, dolls, fairies, etc. that were all so poorly made it was obvious they were fakes. You could see parts of the machines inside them, and hear the gears turn as the neck did on some of them... Seriously, at least make it so we can't see the machines...

Why is there such a huge gap in quality between the amazing rides like The Black Dragon, and the other ones like this haunted house and that costume show?

This is something I only found out later, but apparently this haunted house is one of the few remaining original attractions from about 40 years ago when the park was built, and is due to be renewed soon.

"Hey~ hey~ Why is there a blanket hanging on the ceiling!?"

Maria asked, while pointing up at a piece of white cloth hanging down from the ceiling (the strings holding it were in plain sight).

They probably meant for it to be some kind of ghost or something.

"There's ghosts like that out in the world too... Flying blanket ones I mean."

"Do the sheets that old hag hangs out to dry fly too!? Those were ghosts!?"

"That was probably just the wind. These ones aren't like that, they can fly on their own (I think?)."

"Ehhh? Even though they're blankets!?"

"Even though they're blankets."

"Ahaha~! What the heck? I don't get it at all~!"

Maria was still full of energy, unfazed by the haunted house.

"Kukuku... Although they may indeed be my fellow clansmen of the night, to think they would allow lowly life forms such as humans to control them as such... Leysis vi Felicity Sumeragi commands you... Destroy yourselves immediately."

The very second Kobato said that to the woman-shaped doll wearing a kimono in front of her, its head fell right off.

"Fhyahhh!? An-chaaaann!!"

Kobato came running over, screaming, and then clung on to me.

...I gotta admit, that was some good timing. It even scared me a little bit.

Then it happened, right after I thought that.

Something started pulling on my sleeve from behind.

"...Uoh!?"

I had just gotten startled by that doll, so having the additional shock of getting grabbed from behind made me twitch in surprise.

I turned around, and saw it was a beautiful maid with a pale face grabbing on to me.

...It was just Yukimura though.

"W-what's the matter, Yukimura?"

"I-I'm terribly sorry, Aniki."

Yukimura looked a little flustered before letting go.

"...Did that scare you too?" I asked.

Yukimura nodded, his cheeks a little red.

"Yes, to a most shameful extent... I still have much to learn..."

"I don't think you really have to be ashamed about it... Actually, I'm relieved."

"Relieved...?"

Yukimura looked mystified as he tilted his head.

"Yeah. It's good to see that even you have things that make you panic."

"Aniki..."

Yukimura started staring at me with a blank look on his face.

I accidentally let my heart skip a beat seeing that, and quickly turned away to hide it.

He's cute, but he's a guy, he's a guy, he's a guy...!

"Gfufu... Thank you for the unexpected eye-candy, Senpai, Yukimura."

A disgusting smile rose to Rika's face.

Apparently that doll with the head that falls off was the last thing in the haunted house, because we got out after walking through a dark hallway a little while later.

"Man, that was kind of a letdown!" I said.

"I agree with you completely!" Rika said, with a nod.

"But, I do think that armored soldier's ghost that kept floating in front of us was super high quality. The rest was all retro machine designed stuff, but the way that ghost flew around was in a whole different dimension. In fact, it's kind of embarrassing, but even Rika couldn't tell how they managed to control it. I think it probably used lasers, but I couldn't find anything that looked like a sensor on the walls or ceiling no matter how much I looked~ It's gotta be a pretty detailed system to get it to float in front of us the whole time like that~ I kinda wish I could've figured out the trick~"

She was talking as though she didn't really care one way or the other, but I could tell that she actually was frustrated she couldn't figure it out.

My reaction to that cute junior of mine who surprisingly hates losing was as follows:

"..................T-there was a ghost in there...?"

I think our genius inventor, Rika Shiguma, might be able to see into the other world.

I left the haunted house with a cold chill running down my spine.

☺

After the haunted house, we did three more thrill rides: the coffee cups, the swings, and go karts before getting on the Ferris wheel.

"Uohhh! This is super high~! Being up high is so fun~!"

...Maria must really like high places.

Maria generally liked every attraction we went to, but she gets particularly excited whenever we go on one that takes us up high.

The Ferris wheel we were riding right now was called the 'Aurora Borealis', and was one of Yokoshima Wonderland's more famous rides, which isn't surprising, considering that it's one of the biggest in Japan.

It used to boast being the largest attraction out of all of them until about 10 years ago when The Black Dragon stole that position.

That said, it lets you enjoy the view way up high, unlike The Black Dragon, and remains popular to this very day.

"Kukuku... They're like little ants..."

Kobato gave us one of her standard lines as she looked down at the people on the ground.

"Still, you can see how amazing The Black Dragon is when you look at it from up here."

It was easy to tell how huge it was when you looked at it from the top of the Ferris wheel.

It's insane when you think about how you fall from a spot higher than the top of the 'Aurora Borealis' where you can see not only the entire park, but way off into the horizon too.

"...Now that I think about it, I wonder what Yozora and Sena ended up doing."

They were the ones who were supposed to tell us when they wanted to meet up, but I had yet to get a text from either of them.

"Do you think they're still in line?" said Rika.

"Nah, no way that's it."

I looked over at The Black Dragon's entrance.

There were more people than this morning, but even so, it didn't look like more than a 10-20 minute wait.

It's already been two hours since we split up with Yozora and Sena too.

I figured I'd call just to see what was up, but neither Sena nor Yozora answered.

"Do you think they're just too busy arguing with each other to notice?"

"You know, they probably are."

I had to agree with Rika's deduction.

"...Oh well, should we go look for them?"

☺

We headed over to The Black Dragon's entrance area after getting off the Ferris wheel.

It's technically possible that they went over to other attractions, but I really doubt it considering how bad they get along.

I tried calling them again when we were walking over, but, as I'd expected, I didn't get an answer.

While wondering just what the heck they were doing, I started darting my eyes left and right, looking for them as we walked.

And, just a short while later,

"Aniki. I have discovered their location."

Yukimura said in a calm tone of voice, raising his finger and pointing at something.

I looked at where he was pointing, and saw a girl with short black hair sitting next to one with blond hair on a bench about 10 meters away from us.

"Oh, there they are."

We quickly walked over to their bench.

Yozora was there in her boyish clothes, as was Sena in her flashy, but cute ones.

The way they were sitting together, resting on each other's shoulders, made it look like a young boy with black hair was out on a date with his blond-haired girlfriend, flirting with her. Honestly, it looked very picturesque.

...As you got closer though, you could see that was a huge mistake. Their eyes were half rolled back, their mouths were just hanging wide open, they looked like they were sick, and I could even see that their cheeks were stiff, probably from screaming too much.

They looked just like a... zombie couple.

"...What the hell did you guys do?"

I timidly asked, and they both answered, "Ah, Kodaka..." in a voice that sounded more like a moan than anything else.

"...A-are you guys…?"

"Ughh... My head hurtsh..."

"I feel shick..."

Yozora and Sena both answered in turn, like a pair of zombies.

"What the heck happened...?"

"...We rode it..." said Yozora.

"Rode it...? The Black Dragon?"

They both gave a weak nod.

"Eijht times..."

Sena moaned out a follow up to what Yozora said.

"...? Eight times...? Ummm..."

I told myself there was no way, but asked anyway to be sure.

"...You rode The Black Dragon eight times?"

They both nodded.

Just riding it once was enough to severely damage your mind and body, and here these two went and rode it eight times in a couple hours...

"Are you retarded?"

I stated my honest thoughts to them, which resulted in two pairs of bloodshot eyes glaring at me.

Holy shit, that's scary!

They look like they're about to pass out, but those stares of theirs aren't any weaker than usual. In fact, they're actually scarier.

"...It's because Yozora wouldn't just admit she lost..."

"...It's because Meat wouldn't just go and die already..."

They both glared at each other.

"...So you decided to keep riding until one of you gave up, and in the end you both rode it eight times...?"

They both nodded again.

Sheesh... There's a limit to being a sore loser, ya' know.

"Wow~ So, who won?"

Rika just had to ask, didn't she?

Yozora and Sena then said, while glaring at each other,

"...There isn't a winner yet... Ghh..."

"...Now then... It's about time to start round nine... Uuu..."

Their voices were so deep they sounded like a zombie's moans, but they both managed to stand up, albeit barely.

I have to admit that their iron will to continue the battle no matter how badly they get hurt is admirable, but this is one showdown that just isn't worth the effort.

And I mean, I get the feeling their lives might actually be in danger if they keep this up.

"Give it a rest, you both fought well... Just call it a draw and shake hands, ok?"

"I refuse...!"   "I'd rather die...!"

They both replied instantly.

"This piece of meat is the one thing I'll..."   "Yozora is the one person I'll..."

""Never lose t――

OgEHhhHhHHhHhhhH""

Aaaand they barfed.

Forcing themselves to yell that loud when they were already barely standing caused them both to spectacularly throw up everything in their stomachs at almost the exact same time.

"Ugeh! Eww, they threw up! Nasty!"

Maria said that cold, hard truth without even the slightest hint of tact or consideration.

"Uguah..."   "Uegh..."

They both spent the next little while hunched over, going "guehh guehh" as they threw up.

"A-are you two ok...?"

I was worried about them, but couldn't stop myself from letting out a big sigh.

These two are such a handful.

Anyway, at least this means their little match is over.

...By the way, I was actually standing right in front of them, and as a result, got some of their puke on my clothes......... I want to cry...

Back to Amusement Park ~ Astaroth Chapter ~

Return to Main Page

Forward to Hot Springs