Baka to Tesuto to Syokanju:Volume1 The Third Question

Third Question

Please translate the following sentence into English[1]:

これは私の祖母が愛用していた本棚です。

Himeji Mizuki's Answer

“This is the bookshelf that my grandmother had used regularly.”

Teacher's Comment:

Correct answer. Himeji is really hard working!

Kouta Tsuchiya's Answer

“My grandmother”

Teacher's Comment:

You only know how to translate 私の祖母?

Akihisa Yoshii's Answer

“☆●◆∇┐♪*×”

Teacher's Comment:

Please use a human language to answer the question.

Declare a war against Class A.

This suggestion sounded too unrealistic for Class F.

“It is impossible to win!”

“I don't want to get even worse facilities.”

“I am satisfied as long as I have Himeji in the class.”

Cries like this were filling up the room.

Well, even a blind man could see the difference in fighting ability between Class A and Class F.

It had been four years since Fumitsuki Gakkuen adopted the examination system without the highest score limited to 100. Under this system, students could answer as many question as they could in an hour. As a result, there was no limit to how many marks a student could score. As long as the student was smart enough, the score could increase indefinitely.

Besides that, there was a 'Syokanju[2] Summoning System' which was accidentally created by combining the science and supernatural power. Under the teachers' supervisions, students could summon their syokanju with the power equal to their result and fight against each other.

Nowadays, the overall result was really bad, and this was the latest system invented to encourage the students to study. With this system as the core, students were allowed to have an inter-class war, called 'Test Summoning War,' which used the syokanjus to fight against each other.

The result of this test was very important in the war. However, the difference in result between Class A and Class F was huge. If we fought head on, one student from Class A could probably have beaten three students from Class F at the same time. Actually, if the student was good enough, he or she might be able to take four or five of us out at the same time.

“We will win for sure. No, I will show you that we will win.”

Knowing that the difference in our fighting ability was huge, Yuuji still confidently declared that we would win.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“That's impossible, right?”

“What make you so sure about this?”

Objections came from every corner of the room.

Well, no matter how you looked at it, this was not a winnable war. I couldn't deny that, although I promised Yuuji to start the war together. But I wouldn't give up just because we would definitely lose!

“Of course I have my theory. I said that because we have every factor that can make us win the war in this class.”

The whole class were on rage after Yuuji said that.

Was it possible that we could win? Even though we were Class F, the worst class in Year 2?

“Let me explain it.”

My bad friend stood on the podium and showed a daring smile on his face; overlooked us from above the ground.

“Kouta, stop leaning on the tatami and peeping Himeji's underwear. Come here for a while.”

“!(kept shaking his head)”

“What!”

The male student called Tsuchiya Kouta desperately shook both his head and hands, trying to show that he didn't commit such crime. Himeji pressed down her skirt and hid far away; that male student hid the mark of tatami on his face, and walked towards the podium. He was simply amazing. He was the only person who dared to use that shameless and inappropriate pose to peep girl's underwear; this was at a higher level from someone like me who could only think of using a small mirror to peep.

“Tsuchiya Kouta, this guy is the famous 'Silent Pervert'.”

“!(fiercely shaking his head)”

Tsuchiya Kouta might not be a very well-known name, but 'Silent Pervert' was different. This name held the respect and fear from the male students; the despise and disdain by the female student.

“He is THE silent pervert...”

“How's that possible? The silent pervert looks like THIS?”

“But there is the evidence that he was brazenly peeping!”

“Well, he does live up to his name!”

He was hiding the mark of tatami on his face using his hand, with a sorrowful look on his face. I heard he never admitted what he had done under every circumstance. Well, one eyewitness was better than ten hearsays.

“?”

Himeji looked like she had a lot of question marks above her head.

Could it be that she didn't know where the nickname 'Silent Pervert' came from? Should I explain it to her?

“As for Himeji, there is no need for explanation, right? Everyone should know how good she is.”

“Yes? Are you talking about me?”

“Yeah, you are our main force; I am looking forward to your performance!”

If we were really going to start the Test Summoning War, I thought nobody would be more trustworthy than her.

“You are right; we have Himeji on our side!”

“If she is here, we won't lose to those nerds from Class A.”

“Nothing matters anymore as long as Himeji is here.”

Who was it? Who was the person that kept sending love messages to Himeji?

“We also have Kinoshita Hideyoshi.”

Kinoshita Hideyoshi, although his result was not very outstanding, he was very famous in other areas, such as the star of drama club, had a twin sister etc.

“Oooo....”

“He is Kinoshita Yuuko's ...”

“Of course I will give it my best shot.”

“I know you are the guy who meant what he said.”

“Wasn't Sakamoto called 'Whiz Kid' when he was in primary school?”

“So that means he is not feeling well during class division examination like Himeji?”

“Then we have two people with Class A ability in our class.”

We might be able to win! This kind of atmosphere was roaming in the class now. That's right; somehow the morale of the class had increased a lot.

“Also, we have Yoshii Akihisa.”

Total silence.

Then the morale dramatically dropped.

What! Was my name so destructive? Also, I didn't see why my name should be mentioned now!

“Wait a second, Yuuji! Why do you want to mention my name now! There is no need for it!”

“Yoshii Akihisa? Who is it?”

“Never heard of it.”

“You see! The morale that you hardly raise is gone now. I am different from Yuuji and the others, I am just a normal peasant. Please treat me as how you treat normal person---Wait, why staring at me? It is not my fault that the morale drops!”

(Sigh) Even if someone in the class had heard of my name, it would not be anything good anyway. Since they didn't know about me, I didn't have to purposely make things worse.

“If you don't know, then let me tell you! His title is the ‘Kansatsu Shobunsha’[3].”

Oh no, he said it.

“Isn't it another word for idiot?” Someone in the class gave a fatal opinion.

“N... No! That is just a small nick name for a sixteen years old mischievous teenager.”

“Yes, it is another word for idiot.”

“Can you please don't agree so surely, idiot Yuuji!”

"Kansatsu Shobunsha" was a punishment given to those students who had some small problem in studying. Actually I was one of them. But, it was only because I was not as good in studying as others!

“Excuse me; may I know what does it mean?” Himeji slightly leaned her head one side, looked like she was confused. To the students who always stood at the top of the pyramid like her, it was reasonable that she was unfamiliar with this title.

“To put it simpler, it is a student that helps the teacher to do miscellaneous work. Their syokanju have the privilege to touch other objects, and can be used to do those tiring task.”

That was right; normally a syokanju could not touch any normal objects. All they could touch or interact with were the other syokanjus; In other words, it was the same as a phantom. By the way, the floor in the school had been specially made, so the syokanju could stand on the ground. But my syokanju was different. Just as what Yuuji said, it was a special version that could touch normal objects.

“Oh I see, that's magnificent! I heard that the syokanjus have incredible powers aside from their cute outlook, being able to touch normal object will be very convenient.” Himeji gazed at me using her shiny eyes with admiration and respect; to tell the truth, it made me feel itchy all over my body.

“Ha ha, that's nothing special!” Anyway, I denied her thought by waving my hand.

Actually, this really was nothing special. If I could order my syokanju freely, that would really be a convenient skill to have. That was because even the syokanju that was summoned by a person with bad result like me, had much stronger power than a normal person could have. If I wished to, crushing a rock was as easy as ABC. However, my life had never been able to be benefited by this special ability; it was actually totally the opposite. It was because the syokanju could only be used under the teacher's supervision. In other words, I could summon it to help me do stuff whenever I wanted. Teachers would only call me when they needed to use the syokanju to do heavy task, and let me summoned it to help them. That was the truth. And to me, there was no benefit at all. Since it was under teacher's supervision, I almost never use the syokanju to do anything that benefited me.

Besides, part of the effort that the syokanju spent in doing the work, would be transferred onto me. For example, my syokanju carried a heavy object and ran around in the school; part of its tiredness would be transferred to me. Also if the heavy object dropped onto my syokanju leg while working, the pain would also be transferred to me. Not only it couldn't be used for personal advantages, the pain and tiredness would be transferred to me as well, it was just plain punishment.

Therefore being a 'Kansatsu Shobunsha' was nothing that worth to be proud of, and made nothing more convenient. It was just given to those students with bad results and lacked the will to study as punishment. This was why it was treated as another word for idiot.

“Wait a minute, since he is the 'Kansatsu Shobunsha,' then, if he was beaten in the war, he would suffer as well, right?”

“That's right, and then we will lose one fighter immediately.”

They found out now. That was why I didn't really want to join the fight. It was because if my syokanju was beaten up badly, I would feel the pain as well!

“Don't worry about it, having or losing a worthless lowlife like him will not change the result.”

“Yuuji, is that what you should say to help me?”

“Anyway, to show our ability, I plan to conquer Class D first.”

“What! You are actually ignoring me like this!” We were standing so close together, and my dissatisfaction just couldn't reach his heart, that was so hateful!

“Everyone is unsatisfied with the current treatment, right?”

“What we want is the systematic tables and chairs from Class A, not the Japanese style table!”

“Of course!”

“Then everyone take your pen in your hand, we are preparing to go to battle!”

“Ooo----”

“Oo,oo...”

Affected by the astonishing momentum in the class, Himeji also raised her small knuckles. Looking at her, I had a will of protecting her. But, it should be me being protected by her right?

“Akihisa, you can be a messenger and declare war to Class D, you must succeed it, even if it means your life.” Yuuji words were so caring! If it was that important, why didn't he do it himself?

“But the lower rank class messenger will be beaten up badly, right?”

“No worry, they won't hurt you, you just do it as being cheated by me.”

“Really?”

“Of course, who do you think I am?” Yuuji gave an unchangeable conclusion without hesitation.

That was right, although Yuuji loved to joke around, he was not a person who like to lie.

“Don't worry, believe in me. I never tell lies to my friend.” That was a very encouraging sentence. In that case, I still thought he was up to something, but I could only believe in him now, I just had to do it.

“OK, leave the messenger job to me.”

“I am counting on you.”

The classmates' cheers and applauses sent me out of the classroom; I left the classroom and headed toward Class D with a solemn and stirring atmosphere around me.

☆

“I am tricked!”

I escaped and ran in the corridor for my life, eventually rolled and crawled back into the classroom. Nearly, I was nearly killed! Those bastards in Class D, they were rushing towards me with scary momentum! I sat on the ground without energy, tried to catch my breath and stared at Yuuji.

“It is just as I thought.”

You dared to say this so calmly? You bastard, I would cut you into pieces!

“What does it mean by just as I thought?! You knew the messenger would be treated like that, right?”

“Of course, else how can I be a class leader?”

“At least feel guilty about it!” Although I had known him since last spring, I still didn't quite understand him now.

“Yoshii, are you alright?” Himeji quickly ran towards me when she saw my clothes were scattered apart.

“Yeah, I am fine; it is just some small wounds.”

Shimada also came close to me. Even though I was in immense pain now, being cared about by others did make me feel good.

“Oh, I see, that's good ...... There are still places that I can punch.”

“Ahh! Give me a break! I am dying!”

I quickly held my hand around my chest and rolled around on the ground. I really couldn't be careless with Shimada even though she was a girl.

“Don't bother about him, we are having a meeting now.”

Yuuji opened the door and walked out of the room after he finished speaking, it seemed like he was going to find another location to have a meeting. You should at least show some concern to your friend you knew? Come to think of it, was Yuuji really my friend? This question was asked from a long time ago, I would think about it up to seven times every week.

“If you still feel painful, please let me know.” Himeji said and quickly followed Yuuji's pace.

“You still feel very painful, right?” A guy with a small body, might make people think that he was a young girl----Hideyoshi, tapped on my shoulder and walked out.

“.....(walking sound)”

Silent Pervert rubbed his face and walked towards me.

“Silent Pervert, have the mark of tatami left over from peeping disappear?”

“....(kept shaking his head)”

“There is no use denying it now, I knew you are a pervert.”

“....(kept shaking his head)”

“In some sense, it is quite impressive that you can deny it under this circumstance.”

“....(kept shaking his head)”

“What colour is it?”

“....(kept shaking his head)”

“Sky blue.”

He answered it instantly.

“Silent Pervert, you really lived up to your name.”

“....(kept shaking his head)”

Just when I was casually talking cock with the silent pervert in the classroom---

“Yoshii, you need to go as well.”

Shimada grabbed my wrist with huge force and dragged me out. Here I was thinking it was a good chance to be lazy.

“Yes, yes, yes”

“Once is enough.”

“Yes madam.”

“One day I will Das Brechen you, how should I say it in Japanese?” Shimada's mouth suddenly slowed down.

What was Das Brechen? I think that's German, right?

“...train”

Silent Pervert's voice came from the side.

“That's right. I need to train you.”

“Train? Shouldn't you use words like 'educate' or 'tutor?'”

“Then I will pick the middle value, and use Züchtigung then.”

“... I don't know what it means.”

“In Japanese, I think it should be... 'Torture?'”

“That's even worse.”

“Is it?” How come she didn't know many normal words and knew these kinds of strange words?

“By the way, Silent Pervert. Why you know the word 'train' in German?”

“... learnt from normal life and moral principles.”

Weren't your moral principles too abnormal? Which moral principles made you learn about words like 'torture'?

“Silent pervert, you never change! Your brain is only rich in knowledge related to sex.”

“....(kept shaking his head)”

We continued this useless conversation and walked around in the school, Yuuji who was walking in front of the team had reached the top floor, he opened the door and got under the sun.

The sunlight was dazzling, shining from the cloudless sky.

The blinding sunlight and the wind in spring made everyone besides the silent pervert cover their eyes, silent pervert didn't do so because he was busy staring at Himeji's skirt which was blown by the wind.

“Akihisa, you already declared war with Class D, right?”

Yuuji sat on the stairs in front of the iron fence.

“Generally I have told them that we will start attacking this afternoon.”

“So we need to have lunch first, right?”

“That's right, Akihisa, can you please eat something normal this afternoon?”

“If you really think so, then treat me to bread.”

I was a person who could put anything into my stomach, anything besides feeling, of course.

“Huh? Yoshii never eats lunch?”

Himeji looked at me in shock. Her life must be really regular, and it seemed that she grew up well because of that.

“Of course I will eat something for lunch!”

“Does that counts eating something?”

Yuuji cut into the conversation.

“What are you trying to say?”

“Well I mean, isn't your main food-----just salt and water?”

Yuuji's sound filled with sorrow and sympathy.

That was so rude. There was a limit to how you treat me as an idiot you know!

“I do eat sugar every meal as well!”

“Yoshii, for water and sugar, you shouldn't use 'eat' as the verb.”

“That's right, you should use 'lick.'”

Everyone was looking at me with a strange gentleness, but it didn't make me feel good.

“Who told you not to plan before spending money, serves you right.”

“That's because the- the money I have for living expenses is too little!”

Actually, my parents were working overseas, so I was living alone. Of course they would send money to me every month.... it was just that most of the money were spent on games and manga. Hobbies really cost a lot of money!

“Well, if you don't mind, let me make lunch for you.”

“Eh?”

The gentle words came so suddenly and I couldn't help thinking that I heard something wrong.

Lunch? From a girl? Handmade?

“Really? I haven't eaten anything other than salt and sugar for a long time.”

“Yeah. If you don't mind, I will start tomorrow.”

“That's great, Akihisa. That's handmade lunch with love, right?”

“Yeah!”

In a situation like this, I needed to honestly show that I was glad. Even if Yuuji's tease was pleasant to hear now.

“.....Haha. Mizuki, you are so nice, making lunch ONLY for Akihisa.”

I was not sure why Shimada used a boring voice and said something a little bit spiteful. What if Himeji said, “I won't do it then,” or something like that, how were you going to compensate me?

“Ah, no! Actually, I can make it for everyone...”

“We can have it as well? Really?”

“Yes, if you don't mind.”

Ooo, even Yuuji had it as well, she was too kind. However, I felt a bit sad that I couldn't enjoy it alone.

“... (nod)”

“... Let me see how good you are at cooking!”

Now including Himeji herself, she had to make six people's lunches, it must be tiring.

“Okay, then I will bring everyone's lunch to school.”

Even in situation like this, she never showed any bit of unwillingness on her face.

“Himeji is very kind.”

This was coming from the bottom of my heart. It was really difficult just to bring the lunch for six people to school; I simply couldn't understand this action.

What a selfless and attractive person she was!

“There, there's nothing like...”

“Although I am saying this so late, but when I first saw you in class, I felt like I----”

“Oi, Akihisa, if you are dumped now, you won't have any lunch tomorrow.”

“---- have known you before”

Successfully avoided being dumped. Luckily I changed "I fall in love with you" before I finished the sentence. My judgement was simply amazing.

“Akihisa, confessing because of own desire, like you, is an action of a normal pervert.”

I hated my judgement now.

“Akihisa, sometimes you will do something out of my imagination.”

“But... lunch with love...”

That was just an action necessary for me to live. It was all because of poverty!

“That's off the topic for a while; let's continue discussing about the Test Summoning War now!”

Oh that was right. I had completely forgotten about our purpose of being here.

“Yuuji, I have a question. Why do we fight Class D? If we are fighting in order, our first target should be Class E, right? If we want to fight once and for all, shouldn't we pick Class A?”

“Now that you mention it, it is really like what you said!”

“That's true! But I have a different plan.”

Yuuji boldly nodded his head.

“What plan?”

“Although there are a lot of reasons, but the reason for not attacking Class E is simple. It's just because it's not worth our time fighting with them.”

“Huh? But they are at a higher rank than us, right?”

Since the class division was based on the result, then of course Class E would be better than we Class F, right? Why did he say it was not worth our time fighting with them?

“Ha, that's true according to class division examination result, but the actual situation is different. Have a look, who do you have around you?”

“Er....”

I did as Yuuji said, looked around the partners around me. Hmm, who we had here now were----

“Two beautiful girls, two idiots, and a silent pervert.”

“Who are the beautiful girls you referring to?”

“What? Yuuji, you are reacting to the words beautiful girls?”

“......(face getting red)”

“Silent pervert, not you as well? What should I do? I can't correct their thinking all by myself.”

“Everyone, calm down! Just let the silent pervert represent it.”

“That. That's right.”

“Wait a minute, before we continue the meeting, I want to protest that beautiful girls are affecting people's mind.”

“Anyway.”

Yuuji cleared his throat, and continued his explanation. Was he trying to ignore my existence?

“If Himeji can perform normally, Class E is not our match even if we fight them head on. Since our final target is Class A, it is meaningless to waste our time fighting with Class E.”

“Then how about fighting Class D head on?”

“That, we don't have a hundred percent chance of winning.”

“If that's the case, we should target Class A in the beginning.”

My target was Class A, not Class D. My aim for having this Test Summoning War was different from Yuuji's.

“That's because it's our first battle, you guys want to have a great fight, and grab everyone's attention, right? Also, as I said just now, this is what we need to defeat Class A.”

This was the plan for wining Class A? But Yuuji didn't want to let us know the details of his plan.

“Ex... Excuse me!”

It was not often you see Himeji used such a loud voice to speak. What was going on?

“Himeji? What's wrong?”

“Err, that... what you are talking just now was the Test Summoning War that Yoshii and Sakamoto discussed about before, right?”

“Oh, you are talking about that. Just now, Akihisa come to talk to me for you Himeji about---”

“So that means!”

To stop Yuuji continuing his needless speech, I purposely raised my voice.

“If we can't win Class D, then what we said before is meaningless.”

Facing my doubt, Yuuji laughed out loud.

“With all of you helping me, we can definitely win against Class D.”

Win against Class D? With our help? In the Test Summoning War?

This was a strange feeling.

The words just gave us the momentum to do things even though there was no proof for them.

Yuuji's words seemed to have this kind of magical power.

“Great. It looks like it is going to get interesting!”

“Let us pull those proud nerds in Class A down to earth!”

“....(praise)”

“I... I will try my best.”

Defeat Class A.

It might sound crazy; it might be a dream that would never come true.

But, if we never do anything, dreams would never come true.

Since we were allocated in the same class, it was not bad to just try to do something together.

“All right, let me explain the battle strategy!”

We stayed at the top floor, enjoyed the cozy wind, and listened to the strategy that would bring us to victory.

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