OreShura: Volume 4 Chapter 6

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Chapter 6 Traveling by the Car Window is Mayhem

Oreshura v04 109.jpg


"It's definitely not green."

At 8:02 AM, at the departure of special express train 「Wing Number」 this happened to be the first line said as an opening comment by Hime.

"No Hime, because the car is referred as green, it doesn't had to actually be green." [1]

"Is it wrong? Then what is it"

"Uh......"

Strange, now I that I think about it, I didn't know either.

"You don't know? Then as punishment can you hold me?"

"No, I don't understand your logic."

"How about a green hold?"

"I don't understand the green on that."

Ah—this was so relaxing, these interactions with Hime that didn't make sense.

Behind me, Masuzu gave a loud 「cough」 and cleared her throat:

"Please don't stand in the entrance. You're blocking the passengers behind us."

"Oh, sorry."

I poked at Hime's back to urge her forward, and then followed behind her. Our seats were in the innermost compartment of the carriage number eight.

"The inside of the green cars are really empty, perhaps this car was reserved for us?"

"There's still a lot of people lined up on the platform—"

Behind Masuzu, Fuyuumi and Chiwa looked back outside the car and said.

Although this was my first time taking the green car, I never expected it to be this empty.

I'll really have to thank Saeko-san later. She said 「everything will be a company expenditure」, so she handled the booking of our five tickets.

And because she a shift today, she arranged to meet us tomorrow on the spot by noon.

The train was expected to arrive at Funase station at 9:05 AM, and for a party of four women and one man, there was still a few minutes before departure.

So—

Our seats were in the last row, A ~ E. Counting in order from the window, there were three seats, A, B, and C. Across that were two seats, D and E. All the other rows were two-seaters, and only the last row was designed for groups of five members.

As expected of Saeko-san, she had considered our number while booking tickets.

"—So, who will be sitting next to Ei-kun?"

Chiwa fired the first shot, and opening the game to fight over seats.

"Why don't we just sit according to what's printed on the ticket?"

Incidentally, I got the ticket for seat D, and the person sitting next to me who had the ticket for seat E was Masuzu.

"But isn't it boring like that?"

When Chiwa made this remark, Fuyuumi and Hime unanimously agreed, 「Yeah—」. What's with these girls? They are in total synchro.

Masuzu tilted her head with an 「Eh?」:

"I so happen to be the girlfriend. Isn't it obvious that we'll take into account human relationships when assigning the seats?"

"There's no such thing. My house is next door to his, so I'm equally qualified."

"In my past life, I was also neighbors, so I'm also eligible."

Well there was nothing to say about Chiwa, but this was my first time hearing this setting from Hime. This was definitely something she just added!

"I sat next to him in Star class in kindergarten, so I'm also qualified."

Fuyuumi casually added. Is what she said true? I honestly can't remember anything about it.

"Hey, forget whether it's a matter of where you live, or past lives, or Star class, I don't think this has anything to do with train seats."

The three of them turned a deaf ear to my complaints, and all of them placed their glares on Masuzu.

Amazingly this situation seemed to be Masuzu VS. the rest of the world. Why is it? If you wanted to fight over seats, shouldn't this be a free-for-all where everyone else is the enemy?

Because I couldn't just keep them standing there, I took all the tickets, shuffled them, and had the four of them draw cards like poker.

In order from the A seat, Fuyuumi, Hime, Chiwa —

"In the end, I am The girlfriend is justice justice."

Masuzu drew the E seat next to mine, and she held the ticket with a sense of victory and pride. In contrast, the other three who had a displeased look.

Things that should have gone back to where it started returned to where it started.

If we take into account our objective of demonstrating the 「boyfriend & girlfriend relationship」, Masuzu sitting next to me was a great result.

I communicated to Masuzu after we sat down with a few glances.


—————Do you understand? Eita.

—————Leave it to me, I'll make these lovestruck people feel inferior.


With maximum out power, I put on a 「shining smile」:

"Hey honey, let me help placing your luggage on the rack—"

"Thank you very much♪ You are always so sweet with me."

"This is the least I can do for you—"

Although it feels a little bit like a forced dialog out of a script, I had to dance to the tune of the boyfriend.

"Eita-kun, after we arrive, want to go for a walk along the seaside?"

"Sure — and then afterwards let's watch the sunset together — that's just like something lovers would do—"

"Fufufu, that's a given right, right? After all, we are a lovers."

"Yeah, that's right— Hahahaha�—"

Like it wanted to overlap with the laughter, the bell tone of the train sound.

The car swayed slightly, and then began to travel forward.

At this moment—

"Kya— i-it's shaking — ♪"

Across the aisle, Chiwa slid into my knees like a landslide as if her body was wildly thrown.

"Sorry! Ei-kun, I'm a little out of balance!"

"Oh-oh, are you okay?"

I helped up the up the 「hehehe」 laughing Chiwa back to her seat……

Did, at any point, the car shook so dramatically that it would cause people to fall from their seats?

I revived the mood that was going on and turned back to Masuzu.

"If not that, then we can go to the beach for a walk and look for shells. That's also very romantic. If you happen to find a pink shell, then I'll have a little present for you—"

"Kya — the earth is shaking~"

This time it was Hime.

Hime swayed back and forth like a willow tree, and snuggled against me, hugging my neck.

Why did she change seats with Chiwa?

"What's wrong, Hime? Did something happen?"

"Mother EarthGaia was wounded by the Evil Dragon ClanWyvern's attack, so why don't you hold me?"

I refuse!

"That being said, then car isn't actually shaking much? Aren't we traveling quite smoothly?"

"I disagree. The Evil Dragon ClanWyvern's Darkness Green TechniqueTestament that crushing the earth's vibrations. My sensors have detected this"

"Aaah- enough, I get it!"

I tore the Hime who hugged me off, and returned her to her seat like Chiwa earlier.

Masuzu could not help but frown:

"Just what kind of ruckus have they been making for a while?"

"I want to know that too!"

At this point, I sensed 「something」 moving.

I immediately turned around, and was surprised to find Fuyuumi had already shifted to where Hime was sitting earlier. Although she was casually looking away, her body was slightly leaning towards my side.

"Hey, why did you change your seat?"

"Because Hime-chan said she wanted to check the view from the window."

Although she replied like this, she didn't meet my eyes.

"I see……"

I see it, the plan of these girls.

I originally thought Fuyuumi's and Chiwa's relationships were incompatible as fire and water, but actually they had reached a consensus thanks to the point of being 「anti - Masuzu」…… they even got Hime caught up in it.

So last night when she was on the phone with Chiwa, it turns out they were actually planning a detailed how to 「split」 battle plan.

How could have anticipated, a event like this?!

"............"

"............"

Gloomy silence muddled between us.

I stared intently at the side of Fuyuumi's face, and continued to us my eyes to pin down this girl's 「shaking」.

"……Kya—"

"Nothing is shaking!"

"Kya—"

"I'm telling you that nothing is shaking, Sooh—!"

Please lend me strength, Yamamoto-kun! Sooh— Sooh—!

"It's definitely not not shaking! It's really shaking a lot"

Fuyuumi pointed to her two companions.

Chiwa and Hime cried, 「iiiiiiit's shakinggggggggggggggggggggg!」, as they shook at high frequency on their own seats….. it was more accurate to call it trembling. What was this? Did they activate vibration mode?[2]

At this moment, the train actually shook a little.

Because I was staring at Fuyuumi, she used all her strength to prevent herself from falling over, but it turned out Masuzu next to me took the opportunity to lean against my shoulder.

"Are you okay, Masuzu?"

"I'm fine, it's all thanks to Eita-kun stopping me with his embrace."

Masuzu's sweet smile was three times cuter than usual.

On the other hand, the vibration mode trio started fighting amongst themselves almost immediately.


"Hey, Ai! What are you staring at? That was obviously a good chance!"

"Master, I was wrong about you. You should have struck more deeply."

"I-It can't be helped that it was too sudden! and I was opposed to this plan from the start!"

"Eh—how can you say that?!"

It looked like the alliance between my childhood friend, ex-girlfriend, and fiancé was actually quite fragile.



After all the commotion calmed down, it finally felt like we could hold a normal conversation.

Chiwa and the others had apparently given up on 「internal infighting」. Hime played on her handheld device, Chiwa was eating mouthfuls of snacks, and Fuyuumi was reading. Each of them were doing their favorite type of thing to do.

Although I was deliberately acting intimate with Masuzu — after ten minutes it seemed like we didn't have anything to talk about.

In fact, we rarely have common topics.

The only interest we share in common was《JOJO's Bizarre Adventures》. But even if we talked about JOJO, we couldn't act as if we were wildly in love. Masuzu was overzealous about it, it's enough for her to see road roller, and she'll get emotionally excited [3], or she'll do deep analysis on how the most powerful stand in part four was actually HARVEST, and stuff like that[4]. No matter how you looked at it, it wasn't dialogue fitting for a loving couple.

"By the way……"

Maybe because she sensed that that I felt disturbed by having nothing to talk about, Masuzu took the initiative instead.

"Recently, I saw 「'Magure Punishment Extreme'[5]」. "

"Eeh, for real!?"

This really made me happy! She even said she was 「not interested」, and 「don't care」 before.

"Although I didn't really watch it on TV, but since it's the TV drama that Eita likes, I thought I'd take a look at it."

"Are you really interested in knowing my preferences? I'm really fortunate to be your boyfriend!"

Perhaps aware that we were talking very animatedly, Chiwa and them all looked at us with wet eyes. Awesome, it's going pretty well, so lets keep with this trend.

"But, if you start from the middle, won't the plot be difficult to understand?"

"Yeah, so I went to the rental store to get it, however Since the television version was all taken out out, I rented the film version instead.

"......Hu-oh ~"

I smiled wryly. Instead of seeing nothing, she ended up seeing that—

"What? Why did you mean by that 「Hu-oh ~」?"

"Well, when we're talking about the film version….."

Okay.

To the heart of this 「Maguke」 beginner Masuzu, I the Pro boyfriend will carefully explain everything!

"I think whenever a TV series is adapted into a film, there's always be some subtle differences. But in the case of Maguke, it's really bad. It's not only subtle, but it's extremely 「bad」. The strong points of the TV drama were completely sacrificed. First of all, the scripting was a mistake, because it failed to describe real people. 「Maguke's」 theme is why 「a person would commit a crime」, but the motive of the criminal in the movie is only that he 「wanted money」! Thus, he attacked banks one after another. You get a lot more actions scenes, right? It might of looked really good on the big screens of a movie theater, but were Maguke fans really hoping for this? It should be that he wanted money, rather it should have been why he wanted money, right? For example, in order to pay for the surgery costs of his sick mother, or because loan sharks abducted a lover, or maybe because in order to keep a company afloat they used counterfeit checks in order to prevent their employees and family members from living on the streets, etc. If you don't show these motives, what are they doing?! I thought they were describe these things things at the conclusion, so I had the patience to watch the entire thing, but who expected that the criminal would be hit and fall into the sea! And then it ended! I couldn't keep watching! I really couldn't bear it. The other thing bad about the film version was the boss, since he was a hot guy wearing glasses who came from the hall. Yeah, why did they have to deviate from the TV version? They said it was because the schedule was inconvenient for the actor, but you can't just change them—a local police force and a calm trained elite, these core values opposing is the is the charm of Maguke. They simply didn't understand. And another point, even though this is a small matter, but the actor who sang the opening theme was actually Johnny's actor. What was with that? What were they doing? Well I know that the movie have to attract viewers, I understand that, but Maguke isn't the kind of drama that's targeted at female high school students. So in order to attract this customer base, we should let Johnny sign, and I understand that too. But even if I get it….. aargh, I can't stand it! Maguke's theme should be something deep and richly sung by some uncle voice! No, even if you remove the vocals itself, it doesn't matter if it were just an instrumental. With Maguke being this kind of shadowy narrative story, there's no reason to use some kind of frilly song. Giggling and dancing while singing, 「I want to hold your eyes」, white~ ~ ~ ~ stupid, right? If it was for the purpose of doing business at the cost of undermining the fans of Maguke, we'd really get angry. And if we actually got angry, the feeling will be like, hello there—? Ahh, no matter how I say it, I'd be like a crazy Afghani (laughs)? I'm absolutely not like that, I just want to be an ordinary fan, that's all…… (wry smile). Whatever, I might as well just support this film a little, as a fan of series. This film does have things worth seeing. The film was made after the first season, but it included actors that later appeared in the second and third seasons. Did you notice? Did you notice? Well, you did see it for the first time, so it might have been hard to notice, so you can just leave it to experts like me to explain: the first is the actress for the bank attendant whom the gun was pointed at during the robbery. She ended up being to appearing as the criminal during the second seasons's three words. She's the only actress who has played both a victim and a criminal in the same series! That's a small piece of trivia (laughs). There's also the background music when the main character loses the hostage. It's really good, right? It's really captivating. The song eventually became the theme song of the second season of Maguke! It's a really good piece of music, both deep and vigorous. That song actually appeared for the first time in the film, and this is often a exam question (laughs). There's also—" [6]

"Erm? Masuzu?"

When I realized it, I finally noticed Masuzu was actually staring out the window with a blank stare.

She was reading in pieces:

"Tanaka construction company, Hanamaru's meat, Minato timber plant—"

"Hey ......?"

"#132 County Road, Winner's turn, lunch for ¥590, earn back what's paid too much for, Kutsurogi's inn GRAND OPENING."

I finally noticed.

"Y-You've been reading the signs that we pass?"

Was…… Was my topic really that boring?

"M-Masuzu-san? Were you really not interested in what I was just talking about?"

"We also buy Broken bikes, GOGO'S root mound shop, HEAVEN ELEVEN, language hall bookstore."

"Sorry! I accidentally got carried away! I apologize. Please forgive me!"

I bowed my head, but Masuzu only continued to read signs.

"Irrelevant knowledge food (Limited), DANNYS'S Irrelevant knowledge shop, Irrelevant knowledge the workers—"

"N-No! My knowledge is not irrelevant!"

Pretending to read signs to make fun of her boyfriend, this was a really advanced of a poisonous tongue!

"Swiss Bank Tax Branch Irrelevant, Irrelevant sushi, Irrelevant clinic, Irrelevant sea —————— the sea."

"Huh?"

"The sea, it's here."

I quickly lifted my head, and found that the view Masuzu was gazing upon was—

"Wuahhhhhhh, It's here! It's the sea—————!"

I couldn't help but cheer.

The bright blue sky, and the sunlight at reflected and shined off the waves, and the beach blooming with all sorts of colorful umbrellas. This scene unfolded before us in the window.

"Wow, awesome—! So beautiful—!"

"Fufun, it doesn't look bad at all."

Chiwa and Fuyuumi leaned over, expressing excitement as they surveyed the sea.

But since Hime was asleep holding her handheld game—

"Hey, Hime, get up! It's the sea!"

I shook her shoulders, and Hime opened her eyes with a pop.

"Sea? Where?"

"Not on the window on that side, on this side, this side."

I changed seats with Hime, and she immediately stared out the window, her body stiff.

Her widened eyes seemed to dazzle and shine.

"How is it, your first time seeing the sea?"

Hime didn't take her gaze off the window, but with a voice loud and clear, she said:

"I want to compress it with ZIP!" [7]




Notes

  1. Green cars were used by Japanese National Railways and Japan Railways Group as first-class cars.
  2. Naturally, this is a pun on the cel's vibration only mode
  3. One of the most distinguishable attacks of the series involves a character stopping time, grabbing a nearby road roller and slam it into his victim while screaming ROAD ROLLER DA! to later pound it away until it explodes. This actually came to become a meme and naturally me and my pals always react favorably when we bump into a road roller. WRYYYY (BTW, the 90s ova switched the road roller for a truck)
  4. If you want to know, Harvest is a stand which takes the form of a hundreds of small insects which follow the commands of the user. Stands follow a rule that the closer they are to the user, the stronger they are; and also that if you harm the stand, the user will suffer the same damage as well. Since each individual Harvest is rather weak, the user can scatter them through a whole town and not suffer a significant power loss (most stands work in the 2~10 meter range); furthermore destroying the insects do not cause any damage to the user.
  5. Original name: "Magure Keiji Dontsuu" (まぐれ刑事鈍痛派) , shortened to Maguke
  6. if you are interested, in the novel Eita used up exactly 2 pages for this rant
  7. Refers to compressing files like a picture on a computer.


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