Toradora!:Spin-Off 2 Fall Fattened Tiger Chapter 2

Fall-Fattened Tiger

Chapter 2

☆Minori’s Diet Memo☆

Item 1! <Healthy eating!>

Eating well balanced meals. Of course, we cannot eat too much, but if stress builds up due to insufficient food, it is meaningless. After eating well, go running flat out for an hour.

Item 2! <Healthy Exercise!>

After leaving club activities, run flat out for two hours. Returning from school also, avoid accidents by running flat out. Get a part time job, then run flat out all the way home from your job.

Item 3! <Always Keep Moving!>

Don’t sit still at home. Don’t rest. Always have a plastic water bottle in your hand. If you go to the bathroom, then afterwards go for a walk, thirty minutes at a flat out run. If you watch the television, then afterwards go for a walk, fifteen minutes long at a flat out run. If you chat on the telephone, then afterwards go for a walk, after the call is over run flat out.

Item 4! <Pamper yourself every now and then!>

If the effort wears on you, then once in a while it’s all right to have a snack. If you have a snack, then go out for a walk, three hours of flat out running.

"...Huff...huff...huff..."

"...Huff...huff...huff..."

"...Huff...huff...huh..urp! Ack! ...Yech...”

"Taiga, wh... cough! ...Huff...huff...cough cough cough!"

"Yech... ye... yech..."

"... up ...!"

Off to a bad start.

It seems both of them wound up puking.

Eight o’clock in the evening, a bench in a small children’s park. The two of them were in really bad shape. Ordinary exercise can be nothing more than a routine, but doing all-out sprints after eating is not a good thing. It didn’t even bother Minori... Ryuuji clung to the bench, prostrate. Feeling nauseous, he frantically swallowed his bile. Poor Taiga, down on all fours, her nice ponytail all messed up, couldn’t even resist when a toy poodle, out for a walk, came over and sniffed her.

"Ta, iga… to the bench..."

"...Huff...huff..."

Her jersey sleeve shaking, Taiga grabbed the bench at once and pulled herself up. Taiga said nothing, she was so exhausted she was unable to sit properly on the bench. Then for some reason she pulled her cell phone out of her pocket and hit speed dial.

"Yo, Taiga! What’s up?"

"...Huff... huff... Mi, Mino... rin..."

"What’s all the excitement? Ah, wait a sec. ...hmm. ...yes, it’s OK. What’s up, what’s going on?"

"... Minorin... that... that, from school, that diet memo you gave me, well it’s a bit..."

"Ah, yes, yes. Are you putting it into practice?"

"...Impossible... coming from you, Minorin… walking and running flat out, is wrong, I think… people, usually, running like that, I think... as far as I’ve heard..."

"Are you kidding? Is that so? Taking the time to call while you’re walking, at a flat out run? Wow! Beast! A flat out sprint on a fall evening sure feels good!"

"...Huff...huff... ...Excuse me, I’m feeling a little bad... panting..."

"Eh, have you got a cold? Take care to sleep warmly!"

The phone call over, Taiga put the phone away in her pocket. She simply said, "I think this is the first time Minorin and I disagree."

On the verge of fainting, dizziness making it hard to think, Ryuuji tried to add it all up. Dinner had, in itself, been quite a production. The main course was fish instead of meat. The side dishes were vegetables, full of natural carbohydrates. They expected to moderate their calories without having to suffer much. They were thinking to have their meals this way for a while. Nevertheless, it was a "moderate" degree. Taiga had a bit of trouble getting into her new fall outfit, a flesh-color leotard. This, even though it was new clothing. So of course, refusing to exercise was not an option.

However, for anybody but Minori, recklessly running and running flat out is impossible. They had learned by their own experience that Minori was rather strange. For a normal human being it should be good enough to walk instead of running flat-out. Nobody but Minori could have proposed that "whenever you say walk, it means running flat out". Once a day should be sufficient, provide that one deliberately and without fail takes the opportunity to walk.

"Chestnut! Let’s go! Stop bothering the young lady's butt!"

At that moment, the toy poodle was very much absorbed in sniffing Taiga’s rear, its feet splayed out stubbornly, looking up at Taiga with moist eyes and barking eagerly with a charming voice. Taiga looked it over.

"...What’s with this little dog? Friendly little guy, he seems to be looking at me with love..."

"Kiyuun...", responding to that nose, "Ura!", she took off both her sneakers and went over in her stocking feet. "Ararara!", said the dog’s owner, an astonished lady, as she pulled on the leash. The dog was very excited. "Haga!", without warning everything went crazy. Next thing you know, "A-hahaha-ha-haii-yahha-!", laughter sounded as the dog pushed its face to Taiga’s feet, licked her socks, bug-eyed, belly showing while tears began to flow. In this world, there are truly all sorts of pets.

"... You, some kind of secretion must be coming from your feet..."

"It isn’t a secretion. It’s a pheromone. Shall we put some on your face?"

"No thanks, really. Just try doing that, and I’ll die."

Quite embarassed, the dog’s owner mumbled, "Sorry about that", escaping as quick as she could with the crazy dog. Watching that figure, Ryuuji thought, Dog, is it? ...Now I see. Things like that can be reasons to go walking.

"...Dog, it’s just as well. Going out for a walk every day is not fun. But, if walking becomes a natural daily routine, it really ought to be as good as dieting."

"Hey you! That’s woman’s figure, did you notice?"

Having spoken to Taiga, Ryuuji now bit his lip. Having only really noticed the curly-haired toy poodle, if he could get another look at the pet owner he would have to apologize. People like Taiga cannot be compared to people with normal metabolisms.

"What are those awful eyes of yours looking at? Oh, something else has gone wrong. We can’t run anymore. That is, that guy is not likely to give up wandering around town. We absolutely have to go to the convenience store and do some shopping. Then we can have oden. And ice cream. ...If you try to do like those three fools, every day eating only bamboo shoots, shiitake, lotus roots, all you can do is get frustrated... Arrgh, it’s too unpleasant..."

"Absolutely, that."

Even in the best of times, Taiga is sullen by default. Ryuuji was exposed to the worst of her violence day after day, and what Taiga would be like, with yet more stress accumulating, getting yet more nervous, is terrifying to imagine. For the moment, easing the tension level by joking, the violent girl and the generous guy taking the abuse, the plan came into existence at the last moment. Turning it all into a joke is better than getting sent to the hospital. Hardly a matter for the police.

"... As far as extreme diets are concerned, I am opposed to them. Yet for us, there is still a way left."

"Eh, what, what? Ah, I have it! Liposuction!"

"Great. That should fly. Go ask an American celebrity."

Ryuuji got out his cellphone, looking for a particular address. Whether that sort of woman would be close to her phone on a Friday evening was a nice question... the call sounded twice, three times,

"... Eh, hello? So suddenly, it’s a big surprise. What’s up?"

Got through. It was their representative Japanese celebrity – Kawashima Ami.

"Oh, suddenly’s no good. That’s... a bit awkward, favors for both of you."

* * *

"---What’s with you? My clothing hobby is not strange!"

"Bakachii is wonderfully fashion-conscious by habit. Unusual, her hobby."

They met Saturday, their day off, at ten in the morning. At the same station as the three went to before, in front of the ticket gate. The weather was nice.

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