Difference between revisions of "Jinrui wa Suitai Shimashita:Volume 1 Chapter 2"

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From the door the masked person had left open when they exited, a strange papery butterfly gracefully flits by.
 
From the door the masked person had left open when they exited, a strange papery butterfly gracefully flits by.
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==Author's Notes==
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Revision as of 11:17, 25 October 2022

Several centuries have already passed since the beginning of humanity's decline.


"fairies" have now taken over the world.


An average height of 10 centimeters.


About three heads tall.


Highly intelligent.


Naive personalities.


They're also prone to wetting themselves.


They have peculiar tastes.


They are incredibly nimble.


And they have assumed the title of 'mankind' nowadays.


Meanwhile, we ordinary humans are referred to as 'old mankind'.


We don't have an accurate count of the fairies' population, but it could easily be upwards of about ten to twenty billion individuals.


But this count was made back when neo-anthropology (the study of fairies as a species) was still a young field, so it's probably a bigger number now.


On the other hand, old humanity's population has already sunk below a hundred million. It won't be long before we disappear altogether.


Countries lie in shambles, and civilization has regressed to how it was in the distant past.


The details of the fairies' ecology, provenance, and culture are still wrapped in mystery.


We can see glimpses of their origins through accounts related via various legends, as well as folktales and fairy tales from the era when we still ruled the earth.


But the impetus for their populating the earth is still a mystery.


Of course, the fairies themselves are unaware of it all.


There are no records left of their origin.


They can pen incredible works if they put their minds to it, but they don't ever think of leaving behind any records of themselves.


The fairies do nothing but live indolently on this earth.


As for me? I live as a member of the United Nations Mediation Council in the village of Camphorwood.


A mediator is an international government worker.


As part of their duties under the UNMC, they worked to mediate any differences between humans and fairies when any trouble occurred.


Yes, in past tense.


Nowadays, conflicts that would require mediation between our races hardly occur.


We humans have already let go of our hot-blooded emotions.


With the dwindling human population, we have free reign over vast areas, and people now live in relative seclusion.



Scritch-scratch-scritch-scratch.


For the past few days, the office has been filled with the scratch of a mimeography stylus[1] cutting through a stencil.


After the incident that happened a short while ago, all my time has been spent on writing up a report.


I call it a report, but it isn't something so formal. It is just a diary of sorts, compiled from materials left behind in the office. Doing this doesn't really feel like work.


The manuscript didn't take me long to finish, so I'm taking my time with the illustrations.


I've already printed out copies for reading and archival, and I'm running out of things to do.


"Grandfather, give me another task!" I press my boss, who, unusually, is dozing off at his office desk.


"Mhyeah, there's nothing."


"Surely there's something to be done!"


"And yet, there is nothing."


"I did hear it was a leisurely position, but even so..."


"Then would you be so kind as to clean the place up a bit?"


"I did that yesterday."


I did the cleaning the day before as well, by the way.


"Then why did I see some garbage on the ground when I walked in this morning?"


"Please don't subject me to this mother-in-law bit. And please, give me some easy and creative work to do."


"Of all the impudent, childish things to say..."


Grandfather folds his arms, looking troubled.


"Want to do some fieldwork?"


"So you're just giving me total freedom in my actions again?"


"Our office respects the will of its workers."


"That's just leadership without initiative."


"I'd like you to be self-sufficient about that stuff. Now, then, I've got to get this napping business over with."


This job sure isn't for the hot-headed.


"Um, Grandfather, could you tell me what you used to do back when you started out?"


"Well, the circumstances were quite different. There was a lot to do. But our relations with the fairies were more or less the same as they are now, as keeping regular contact with them is nigh impossible."


I sigh as I reminisce about what happened last time.


"That's true..."



Grandfather claps. Looks like he's thought of something.


"Right, can you help me out for a bit?"


"Um, by that- do you mean with work?"


"What else? It's got something to do with an acquaintance, that is to say, my assistant."


"Ahh..."


I remember now.


Grandfather already has an assistant.


That assistant is basically my senior at this job.


"Didn't you say he was a crass, unmannered beast of a male?"


"He's the ideal of an innocent youngster."


"Oh no, I just remembered. I need to go out today. I've got some fairy culture to study."


"Don't you dare run."


"I'm bad with people I don't know."


"You're really difficult to please... Who do you take after?"


"I'm off. I may head straight home today, so please keep something nice out for dinner!"


"What a grandchild. Are you going to subsist entirely on pastries and other sweet things if I kick the bucket and you don't have anyone to cook for you?"


As I ignore his sermon and head for the door, I spy something strange by the garbage bin.


"I wonder what this is..."


I don't remember throwing something like this away.


I pick it up and show it to Grandfather.


"This is the garbage I was talking about. It's pretty large, isn't it? Truly fit to be called garbage. As a matter of fact, isn't it just garbage?"


People who criticise their kin with snide remarks at the drop of a hat really do exist. Be careful, spouses-to-be.


"Is this a paper dummy of some kind?"


"No clue. Looks like it's something a child made that got blown into the office by the wind."


"It's all crumpled up."


"It's been thrown away no matter how you look at it."


"I do believe this thing's been folded from a single sheet of paper. It's actually quite impressive. Ah, it may be constructed with origami, now that I think of it. I wonder how many sheets it takes to make something this complex... Are you listening, Grandfather?"


Grandfather is leaning back, fast asleep.


"Ah, bother..."

Old people can fall asleep in an instant.


I puzzle over the piece of garbage in my hands for a while.


It's hard to see because of the many crushed portions, but it seems to have had a very complex shape.


Folding this kind of thing from paper requires a considerable amount of skill.


Soon, I find a portion with a small hole.


I puff my breath into it as if blowing into a [paper balloon]. In an instant, various parts that were earlier crushed flat swell up, and countless appendages begin to wriggle about.


"Eek, wha!?"


Surprised, I cast the garbage away.



It lands neatly inside the garbage bin. It's some kind of insect, by the way.


An awfully realistic one at that.


I didn't recognise it for what it was while it still looked like a pile of scrap paper.


I can feel the blatant evil flowing out of it.


"I- I certainly investigated and got to the bottom of this thing, didn't I, Grandfather?"


"Snoooooreeeee"


Is he pretending to be asleep?


There's no doubt. He must have made this elaborate origami insect to scare me.


I even let out an earnest scream by accident.


If it were something simple, something small, or something with a shell like a beetle, I could stand it, but certain kinds of grubs, of the more artful variety (possessing multiple, multicolored protrusions) or wriggly worms that live in groups absolutely harrow me.


The origami creation that just assaulted me is definitely the first kind. Spare me the surprise attacks, please. This encounter was insidious and brilliantly calculated, especially since I was even convinced to touch and blow air into it with my very own mouth.


Grandfather is still pretending to sleep. I bet he's chuckling to himself in his head.


I peer into the garbage bin again to check on that vulgar art piece one last time.


"It's way too realistic..."


Proper examination reveals its nature as an arthropod.


It doesn't have the smooth style of a centipede or a millipede.


It's shaped a bit like a traditional Japanese[2] slipper, in a way.


I feel like I've seen this kind of insect somewhere.


"... A pillbug?"


No, it's slightly different.


But if you were to flatten a pillbug, it would probably look exactly like this.


It even has the same ridiculous number of legs.



Whoever crafted this prank spent a lot of time and effort on it.


"Snoooore"


I turn around sharply and shoot him a blank glare, but Grandfather still hasn't stirred.


"I'll be back soon..."


It's been a couple of days since I visited the trash heap. It's quite close, but I still break into a light sweat because of the incline.


The grand city that the fairies had turned the initially bland landscape into is still there but is now shrouded in a deserted atmosphere. There's nobody around, and it's clear to me that they wouldn't want to come back here either.


I think those of the fairy race are, in general, cheerful but are very sensitive to environmental conditions.


It isn't possible to reconstruct a fun environment just by accurately recreating the same initial conditions once more.


Fun manifests itself as the climax of an invisible surge, so to speak. Fairies look solely for such precious droplets of "fun".


Of course, they don't ever tend to settle in the first place.


Even if many of them gather to play, they're never around long enough to foster a sense of community. Maybe this is because they don't need food to live, but the truth of the matter isn't clearly known.


They usually wander around aimlessly, wherever their whims take them. Sometimes, humans encounter individuals or groups of fairies. When I was coming home, I too, saw one of them by chance. They probably search for fun in such a manner.


The trash heap metropolis event was quite influential.


While I used to think it would make my job easier if I encouraged them to form a settlement, I have come to understand that it's not practical to wish for such things. They saw what happened then as nothing but me setting up a single fun event for them to take part in. While I did get a few valuable sketches of the fairies in action, I couldn't create a proper, lasting relationship with them as a mediator between our races.


I walk around the limits of the trash heap surrounding the fairy city, leaving the opposite way from where I entered. I look around, hoping to see if I can't find one last fairy, but no such luck.


"Haaaaaaaaaah"


I sit on the remains of a miniature building on its side to catch my breath. I take some milk candy I made out of my pocket and put one in my mouth.


It's just as Grandfather had pointed out. I'm much better at cooking sweets and pastries than normal food. School didn't have a culinary studies course either. I would always use the sugar syrup and chocolate I got as rations to make sweets.



Ah, but I know enough to boil crayfish (as a gag).


Today's afternoon snack is a milk candy that is readily made with a combination of cream and sugar syrup. The pieces are wrapped cleanly in paper of various patterns.


Enjoying candy while spacing out in the sunlight is a great way to forget annoying things. Annoying things, like linear algebra, for example.


"... I'll have just one more."


I never put on weight, so the amount of sugar I can consume is limitless.


A faint sweetness spreads in the back of my mouth. With a recipe as simple as boiling sugar syrup and cream together, then dusting the result with sugar powder, a sweetness with a deep flavour and an unparalleled longevity on the tongue has been created.


"One more for the road."


My reverie continues.


As I roll my fifth milk sweet on my tongue, I feel someone's eyes on me.


I know that the one behind that gaze is tiny, owing to the faintness of the prickling on the side of my face.


"If I'm not wrong, is that you, Mr. Fishroll?"


"Huh?!"


Such a sound is uttered by the tiny head that is carelessly poking out of the grass.


Mr. Fishroll jerks about in surprise.


"Ah, ah, ah..."


"What are you doing all the way over there?"


I feel like I'm telling him off.


I wonder why I'm like this towards an acquaintance?


"Helloooo?"


"Hyeeek!"


He's trying to get away. I immediately clap forcefully.


When I come up to the grass and root around, I find a colorful sphere rolling about pitifully. Surprised by my clap, Mr. Fishroll has balled up.


When I pick him up to inspect him - "Ah, it's wet..."


He has emptied his bladder, as is customary.


He would become active again if I waited for a few minutes, but I firmly hold the ball in one hand, put my fingertips on the surface in strategic locations, and then give it a good tickle - "Koochi-koochi-koo!"


"Argh!"


Unable to stand it, the ball cracks open, and the limbs and head that were folded up inside pop out. He flails about, but my secure grip keeps him from escaping.


"You need to say something, Mr. Fishroll! Koochi-koochi-koochi-"


Oops, I didn't mean to continue it.


"hwahaaah.." He wriggles pitifully but cannot break free from the tickling.


"Muh-mercy! Have mercy!"


I release him at just the right point.


"Do you remember me?"


"Huh?" Mr. Fishroll looks at my face from point blank.


"Come on now; it was just a couple of days ago!"


"Ah-" Did he remember me? "Don't eat meeee!"


"I won't eat you..."


I feel like we've had this conversation before.


"Eating me is a bad idea! I'll wreak your stomach if you eat me!"


He's begging for his life as if we're complete strangers.


Haha. This might be-


"We're all gonna get turned into Yellow No. 1[3]!"


What do you mean, Yellow No. 1?


"If... If you're dead set on... on eating me... I suppose... You can..."


"Mr. Fishroll, have you perhaps suffered amnesia regarding me?"


I get a vacant stare when I say this.


"Uhm, what?"


"Please try to recall the time when I was naming you."


"Names?"


"Yes. When did you become Mr. Fishroll?"


"When was it?"


"It was just the other day, you know?!"


He spends a quarter of a minute thinking.


"Ahh..."


The look of fear on his face suddenly softens.


"So, do you remember now?"


"Ah! My, my, the day's luck is good, and the sky is clear!"


"Indeed, the sky is blue, and the weather is fine."


"Is that so..."


"Let's start over. How's your day been?"


"It's been hit or miss."


He bobs his head while suspended from my hand.


"But it was really cruel of you to forget me. It isn't even that long since we met too."


"Ahhh... I've lost my honor."


He absently tilts his head.


"I'm docking a point for this."


"Noooo!"


"I suppose even a single day can be taken as a very long time for you fairies."


"Every moment felt like an eternity, ya know?"


"Oh my, I see."


I let out a giggle, and smile.


"By the way, I've been wondering about this for a while now..."


"It's good that you're wondering."


"Do you have a tan or something?"


"Ahh, you're talking about that issue..."


Mr. Fishroll has a full-body tan now.


"And why are you in only your underwear? You must have gotten that tan because you were practically naked."


His underwear consists of a strip of pelt, making him look like some kind of jungle king or something.


"Oh no... She's seen me in my undies!"


"You should watch your words."


The fairy gives me a smug look and says, "I'm living off the land."


"Well, that's all very well..."


"Ms. Human, you should try it too!"


"I think I will eat you."


"Hyeeeek!?"


"I was joking."


"Ms. Human, your jokes give me arrhythmia!"


Is your constitution okay like that?


"Maidens do not lay it all bare (their skin, that is)."


"Is that soo...."


"Now that I got a good look at it, your loincloth has a fish roll pattern, doesn't it?"



"It was that noticeable?"


He's glowing with joy.


"Fish rolls are my favourite thing to eat, you know?"


"Whuh-whaat?!"


"That was a joke too, don't worry. Come now, it really suits you." I put him down on the ground, then rest on the tip of his nose that thing he has had his eyes on, a piece of milk candy - "Here you go."


"Ah, Ahh!"


Losing his composure, Mr. Fishroll hops about while clutching at the candy with both hands. This fishing trip has been a success. I lift the candy about 50 centimeters above, and he comes with it, barely hanging on.


"Nooo, gimme it!"


I let go, and he loses his balance, falling with a "plonk" on his back. He's holding the candy to his chest in a loving embrace.


"I made that, you know. Give it a try."


"It feels like a waste to eat it..."


"Shall I give you one more then?"


"You what!?"


He looks up at me with surprise on his face.


I push a second piece of candy into his hands. Mr. Fishroll shudders, "I never expected something like this would happen."


He sits in seiza, carrying both pieces of candy on either side, then says, "Wanna get married?"


"No."


"I see."


My refusal doesn't seem to have affected his mood much.


"By the way, what happened to your friends?"


"They're being primordial over there."


I don't understand.


"What do you mean, 'being primordial'?"


"Who knows..."


Primordial soup?[4]


"Well, let me ask you something else now. Where are you all settled now? Can you tell me that?"


"All right, I'll do my bestest."


Mr. Fishroll begins walking away. He stops close by and looks at me as if to say, come along.


As he walks, Mr. Fishroll resumes the conversation.


"Are you going to eat the rest later?"


"Hmm, what shall I do..."


"Ahh~"


Mr. Fishroll's back quivers as if he has been possessed by something. I'm not going to do anything about it, though. It seems like he himself expected it too.


"Ah- even, even if it has bones in it?"


They're a source of calcium; it's good for health!"


"Oh well then."




"This place, is this it?"


"Indeed it is."


We've reached our destination.


There's a sprawling savanna stretched out in front of me.


We aren't in Africa, though.


A part of the ruins I had seen before has been converted into this savanna.


They've done something at an extraordinary scale again, somehow!


As I search the horizon, I can see the uneven silhouettes of old buildings and the trees entwined with them as well. Over there is the world I am more familiar with.


They've somehow cleared out the rubble, deforested the area and turned this entire region into a plain, with small shrubs everywhere. And this likely happened suddenly, over a very short time interval.


"I was quite surprised back then, but you've all managed to do something crazy today too, huh?"


"It's a bigger gag this time around; what do you think of it?"


"I see, but..."


It seems the goal this time is to recreate the kingdom of the wilderness.


I have a decent idea of what a settlement in an environment like this would look.


We continue walking for a few minutes.


We soon come up to a village which is as primitive as I expected it to be.


"I'm back~"


Fairies flood out of the haphazardly erected group of thatch huts when Mr. Fishroll calls out.


They immediately spot me, and their eyes -- which are quite round even normally -- bug out in their sockets.


"It's a human~" "Woahh..." "For real" "Is it safe to go near?" "She won't get angry?"


"What's gonna happen next?" "waaah..." "The human's huge!" "Does she like goboten?[5]" "Yaaay! Yay!" "Gimme a ride!"


They're all wearing loincloths.


"Everybody, I've got some precious candy!"


Mr. Fishroll lifts the two pieces of candy high in the air.


There's a roar of applause from the crowd.


"It's milk candy!" "can! day!" "Ooooh" "It smells so good!" "I want the wrappers!" "Is it handmade?" "Where'd you find it?"


Mr. Fishroll gives his reply.


"I got the candy from Ms. Human!"


"Ms. Human made it?!" "So being big isn't all they're good for?" "Is she handing out more?" "Just like that?" "Unbelievable!" "But maybe she really can..."


"There's a lot more where that came from. Would all of you like some?"


The entire village boils over with excitement when they hear this.


"Gimmeee!" "Aaah!" "Waaah! I want some!" "Nyaargh!" "Is this a turning point in history?" "Today's a festival day!" "Gyawaah!"


The fairies' fervour has surpassed excitement and transcended into complete anarchy.


I reach for my bag and dump the milk candy out in a hurry.


The candy piles up on the grass, and the fairies gather around.


"There's unfortunately not enough to go around for everyone, so please break the candy into pieces and divide it amongst yourselves."


"But..." "How are we supposed to break the candy?!"


"We've no choice but to use these!"


Mr. Fishroll appears, holding a stone implement.


It's a crude spear tipped with a sharp piece of stone.


For a race that is usually very technologically advanced, this tool seems too primitive.


And I'm talking about these weak fairies here. That stone used in the spear... "Isn't that spear tipped with pumice?"


"It is!"


As I thought.


"But it's heavy, so I'll rebuild it with cardboard later."


He's going to use cardboard?


"But wouldn't it become useless then?"


"Oh, I'll compensate for that with willpower, I guess?"


I see.


"All right, I'll cut the candy!"


The entire village is tensely watching the stone spear raised above the line of candy.


"Taaaah!"


The spear strikes the ground.


"Tah, tah, tah!"


And three times more, the spear hits the dirt.


The one who has done this deed looks up at me.


"Well, looks like I can't break the earth."


"I think you've lost sight of your goal."


"What!?"


"You're not very skilled with this tool, huh?"


"Stuff like this... It's hard.


Even though fairies are very dextrous, this super-race still has some weaknesses.


"Let's get this over with!"


Instead of a puny thing like what the fairies tried to use, I find a stone about ten centimeters in diameter first.


And then, I strike the candy.


Perhaps because the angle was wrong, the ball of candy shoots away with extreme force and pinballs around the fairies, who have been intently watching the scene.


If this had been a real game of pinball, I'd probably have gotten a high sco-ooooowww! (momentary panic).


Many have come out of this tragedy with injuries (Calm).



The entire village has been struck with fear, and chaos rules once more.


"It's started!" "Genocide! Genocide!" "It's a pool accident!" "Hyeeek!" "Wait for us in the next life!" "I can't bear it!" "Nyooo!?"


"No, I'm sorry, it wasn't on purpose... um... I'm sorry, truly... I wasn't trying to be mean, I wasn't... uhm... Don't cry..."


It took me half an hour to calm all of them down.


Of course, they've wet themselves, all of them have.


Somehow, in the process of calming them all down, the village's population has been halved.


I wonder where the rest went.



"We've lost some people."


"I'm sorry...."



I've dimwittedly doubled the depopulation rate.


This time, I'll try gently pressing down on the candy with the weight of the stone and give it a gentle tap instead.


The fairies are huddled in their huts, exuding subtle waves of fear, which I sense as I solemnly go about my work.


"...Is that it?"


I can't guarantee that they're split equally, but all the candy has now been broken into small pieces.


The fairies approach, their eyes sparkling.


"Waah!" "It's candy!" "Sweet!" "There's a lot!" "Milky!" "This is happiness, huh?" "Delish!" "Despite the wait, it's so mellow!" "This is the event of the year!" "We're being fed!" "Yum!" "I'm glad to be alive!" "The flavour is splendid, isn't it?"


The candy party is swelling with emotion.


Let me join in as well.


"By the way, Mr. Fishroll."


"Yes?"


You'd made a super futuristic city just a short while ago, so why is today's theme so primitive?"


"We all met and regressed?"


I'm really not seeing the merits of this though.


"Ah, we wanted to ask you something, Ms. Human!" he says with a raised hand.


"All right, come over and we'll talk."


"So about all this, we were thinking we'd try gradually evolving or something."


"Huh? Gradually evolving?"


"We just felt like it?"


I ponder over this statement as he says it.


I feel like there was a similar statement made elsewhere, or maybe not?


They tried to treat me as their god, and the result was that this phrase got imprinted in their memories... Wait, nonononono, this is troubling!


"I'll be charged with interference in fairy affairs..."


"Yes?"


"Ah, no, I was talking to myself. So, gradual evolution. And then?"


"And then, you see..."


I've managed to gloss it over.


"We've been stuck at the primitive human stage for a long while now, ya see. But we've got no idea how to go to the next evolutionary step."


"Ahh, the next step..."


Speaking of which, they're doing all this on their own, so I guess they've also imposed some rules upon themselves.


"We, we want to evolve, we want to evolve well."


"Even if you say that though..."


"What did you humans do, after this stage?"


"Ah, a problem of history, eh? That's going to be difficult."


"Izzatso?"


I bring my face close to his before saying it.


"It's because we have no records of those times."


"You don't?"


"We've lost those."


"I see..."


He doesn't seem shocked, and maintains his composure.


"What is missing?"


"What is missing, you ask?"

"What do humans have that we don't?"


"Hmm, I suppose we have strife..."


"...Strife?"


Mr. Fishroll repeats my words upon hearing them.


A chill goes down my spine.


"Ah, wait a minute. What I said just now doesn't count!"


"No?"


"It wasn't strife, it was hunting."


"Oho."


"Hunting, as well as gathering."


"Hunting and gathering..."


"We used to hunt and gather things to survive. It is in the process of doing this that we humans gained our vital energy, and technological development... Surely."


"I seeee~"


"But, I don't really see any big animals here that can be hunted... And in the first place, your kind don't even need food to survive, do you?"


"Hmm... Hunting and gathering..."


What a close shave.


How did they acquire all their knowledge?


They have the technology to build a futuristic city out of a dump overnight, and have now turned the local ruins into a savanna.


=

"fairies do not have the concept of strife," says Grandfather to me, and I don't think otherwise.


Still, a question remains: how did they achieve such nonsensical heights of technological development? How did they make technological advancements more significant than that of old humanity?


And this savanna... A bunch of ruins have been flattened, and a large swathe of forested land has been cleared, replaced by an entirely different biome... It has transcended scientific advancement into some kind of novel joke. Time and time again, it has been proved that sufficiently advanced science is indistinguishable from japery.


How did they learn such things?


"Before answering that question, I'd like to know what you think."


"I asked because I don't know, though..."


"Aren't you an honor student? Being one isn't a small thing, you know, you're an honor student! Look it up in a dictionary. It means you're above average. It means you're very knowledgeable. How many students in your batch graduated with honors?"


"... Only two."


I make a shaky "V" sign. One of the two was me. Incidentally, the other was one of my friends.


"But the curriculum wasn't as comprehensive as it was in your time, Grandfather. For subjects where the professor in charge died, and nobody else could teach them effectively, other professors with free time would gather the remaining material and use that as a reference to teach us. The density of the material has reduced when we compare the olden days to the present. But, in such an idyllic learning environment, my generation had succeeded in restoring our values of human excellence, with an abundance of imagination and flexibility, and have graduated successfully nonetheless."


"Generation of students, you say? What a weird turn of phrase you've come up with. If you've got such a great imagination, use that to imagine up an answer, why don't you?"


"With an imagination like mine, I'd only get some wild delusions if I tried to arrive at an answer. That's why I never look things up, and just ask away."


"You've let your title go to your head!"


"But..."


"All right, enough. I'm not asking you to present some spectacularly profound insight into the whole thing. Just think it through once and give me your best guess."


Well, I'm going to have to do some thinking now since he's asked me so directly...


What we know of the science of old humanity, the history of it all...


"Competition over land or resources?"


"You won't get even thirty points for that."


"They made technological advancements to avoid having their resources plundered?"


"Wasn't your major subject cultural anthropology? Do you even have a grasp on the subject?"


"Oh no, this great sage's unilateral, childish bullying has left my frail psyche crying for help already!"


"Freudian slip, much?"


"Just give me a minute. I'm trying to collate the information you've crammed into my head just now."


"Here's a hint. You don't need to factor in things like ecology or the biological side. You can also exclude primitive humans, as they couldn't have had much of an influence on the ecosystem."


My mind tends to go blank when I'm hurried.


Um, so basically... A hunter-gatherer's life... it was rather bloody, and life, in general, was a blur... and starvation was a constant... so weapons were developed."


"Something like that was postulated by a famous political thinker named Hobbes[6], I believe."


"So, that's the answer?"



"Your degree ought to be revoked."


"It was just a joke!"


Grandfather is a man with connections in scientific circles after all, and he may have enough influence to really take my degree away, so I can't chance it.


"Ah, I remember now. The lifestyles of hunter-gatherers were that of relative abundance, weren't they?"


"Indeed they were."


Grandfather sighs as if to say, 'So you finally got it, huh?'


"It is said that such societies stabilised fairly quickly. Of course, there were societies that actively performed population control by culling children and whatnot, but their lives weren't as full of the threat of starvation as we would imagine. As long as the number of mouths to feed didn't grow too much, the materials gathered within a particular area would probably have been more than enough."


"There were no wars?"


"There definitely were wars. But such clashes between communities weren't enough to advance weaponry by much. Humanity slowly spread all over the globe while continuing their hunter-gatherer lifestyles. And then, gradually, primitive forms of agriculture were developed, and technology advanced alongside. Here's something for you to ponder on now, what do you think people learnt from agriculture?"



"Food."


"You fail."


"That too, was a joke."


"Truly?"


"Certainly. Uhm, for real this time. From farming, humanity... learnt how to live stably... I believe."


"Yes. That's about right."

What a relief.


"I'll add to that; by stabilising the production of food, populations could easily grow."


"Wouldn't there be more variety in the kinds of manual labour required as well, if the population increased?"


"That's right. Certain individuals with greater power or charisma, such as kings or priests, were freed from the shackles of manual labour. Similarly, jobs of the military sort were also birthed from the idea of the profession.


"The creation of professions also encouraged scientific progress, didn't it?"


"Indeed. In a nutshell, the evolution that the fairies are talking about probably refers to the technological advancements made by old humanity during their transition from hunter-gatherers to an agrarian society. Now, what do you think, granddaughter? Can you see what the fairies are missing in their game of make-believe hunter-gatherers?"


"...Yes. The biggest reason is that the fairies need no food to survive."


"Finally. You've reached the level where you'd get about a 60 on a test." Grandfather allows a teasing smile to develop on his face.


"Indeed, the fairies have no impetus to maintain their health. And so, they have no need for agriculture. In fact, there is very little technology that they would need to maintain their lifestyle."


"But, they do eat sweets..."


"I don't believe there's enough candy in the entire world to actually satisfy their appetite for it. You should just treat it as something they like, which isn't necessary for their survival. Sort of like how old humanity had alcohol."


"But when you think of hunter-gatherers, they give off a savage, barbaric impression, don't they?"


"That's because it's hunting. Hunting is good. It's magnificently good."


Grandfather's fingers are squeezing some invisible thing in mid-air.


The fact that he's pointing an invisible muzzle at me is a tad unsettling.


"To summarise, the fairies are playing their primitive times game with the goal of becoming hunter-gatherers.


"That's one helluva flaw in their little 'game', isn't it."


"Now, what about how they developed their technology?"


"If you can figure that part out, I will personally give you a Nobel Prize."


"Isn't that a little too much?"


"It's because it is one of the biggest questions of this age."


"Grandfather, what do you think?"


"We can only assume that they have evolved purely to pursue their own self-fulfilment. Culture, science and technology have no real roles in fairy society."


"Hmmm.... But can such advancements even be made singlehandedly? As someone who's seen up front what they can do, it just seems advanced to a ridiculous degree, just impossible to understand."


"If you're that curious about it all, just make an effort to do the research already. I'll take care of grading your report."


"I've gone to great lengths to get this chance, so I'm feeling pretty motivated... Perhaps I'll learn something about their developmental processes from this."


"It would be nice if things went well... Here, how's this look?"


Grandfather finishes up the patchwork he was doing, and hands over a white one-piece dress to me. The portion of it that had gotten frayed is now neatly patched up.


"Thank you, you've fixed it up quite well. This dress is one of my favorites."


"Maybe you should learn how to sew as well."


"Oh, but people have these things called strengths and weaknesses."


"What are your strengths then?"


"Probably my ability to absorb knowledge?"


My forte leaves Grandfather at a loss for words.



Making myself look busy like a workaholic, I step out in the direction of the primitive village with my bag. I'm an exemplar at fieldwork, yes, siree.


This is quite ad-hoc.


While staying in the office -- where time runs like molasses -- has always worn my patience thin, contacting other races has turned out to be more stimulating than expected.


This may not be so bad after all.


I enter the ruins via the village and turn west to go down what used to be the main road.


The jagged remains of buildings line the road on both sides.


These buildings, which are now covered both inside and out by ivy and other weeds, stand tall as ghosts of their former selves.


I've entered the wilderness now, but because it's still quite close to inhabited areas, there is no dangerous wildlife here.


The most dangerous animals around are stray dogs, and even those don't stick around due to the frequent hunts the townsfolk conduct.


Just in case, I have with me some gadgets for self-defense, but I would rather avoid any situation warranting their use.


I consult the sketched-out map in my hands again.


A cluster of buildings, a tilted traffic light pole, and some rusted-up automobiles.


Using such things as landmarks, I make my way to the hidden entrance to the village of the lovable fairies.


"It should be here if I'm not wrong..."


I part a thicket and push through with relative ease for about half a meter before breaking through. On the other side, the rest of the thicket has been razed to the ground, and all that remains is a perfectly flat grassy plain.


This is where those fairies of myth and legend who would shy away from the public eye have built their hidden village.


How they did such an impossible thing is anyone's guess, though.


"Maybe they really did use magic after all..."


I sigh at the fact that I made such a statement.


Putting my straw hat back on, I set off once more. While the ground -- which is now flat -- is more pleasant to walk on, the oppressive sunlight beleaguers me instead.


I take a sip from my canteen occasionally while I continue towards the fairy village.


And at this point, something happens.


I feel the presence of something ferocious standing up behind me.


"...?!"




As a person aiming to be a confident and well-versed beauty, I can calmly accept this fact. My body, however, is rigid with fear, and I cannot even bring out the weapon I have with me for self-defense. I remain stock-still and am left grappling with the magnitude of the absolute chasm separating my body from my will. At the same time, an uncontrollable maelstrom of thoughts such as, "No!" or "I absolutely don't want to be eaten!" also runs through my mind.


I somehow manage to turn my head, but my legs give way simultaneously, and I end up crouching awkwardly. In that position, a ferocious predator's form appears before my eyes.


My lungs shrivel up instantly in fear.


Fangs lined with killing intent, muscles pouring with bloodlust, and mottled green skin that would inflict a visceral dread upon any observer. I know -- though only theoretically -- of this evil thing that has reared its head before me.


Considered the largest carnivorous dinosaur in existence, it is none other than that legendary beast of the Cretaceous period, the Tyrannosaurus Rex! -- or rather, a papercraft[7] model of one (a meter and a half long).


"What's this now..."


Since the length of its body includes the tail, its height is probably only about 60 to 70 centimeters -- unless it's on tip-toes.


"Uhm... is someone controlling it?"


It seems this dinosaur is naught but a papersaurus possessing no vocal cords, as it only continues to gnash its fangs at me silently.


The most astounding part is that it can move on its own.


Normal papercraft creations can't do that.


Taking a closer look, it is an extremely fine piece. The body has been skillfully constructed as an amalgamation of tiny cubes with no gaps in between them.


This is quite a high-level model, isn't it? The eyes are just hollow circles, but the body itself is vibrantly colored.


Even though its coloration is composed of only haphazard splashes of primary shades, the design still manages to look quite refreshing somehow.


The papersaurus is now busy gnawing at my leg, but I feel no pain, not even an itch.


Having gotten past my initial astonishment, I now proceed to touch it directly.


"Oh my, my, my."


The joints have been constructed to facilitate movement.


As a test, I try lifting it up but am surprised to find that though it is large enough to comfortably fit under one's arm, its weight is unthinkably heavy given that it is made of paper. However, it is not as heavy as a child of a similar size.


"Now, I wonder how this thing moves..."


I look inside it through its eyeholes.


The papersaurus begins to squirm with a papery rustle.



"Oh, rubber bands."


The dinosaur is writhing around desperately, trying to prevent me from looking inside it.


Embarrassed, eh? You're embarrassed?


Is this dinosaur's culture one where it's embarrassing to reveal their precious, oh-so-precious rubber things?


It is now pushing at me directly -- perhaps to headbutt me -- so I pin it down with a sharp "Eiyah."


"... It died?"


It gets up slowly, then walks away with its shoulders slumped.


It's feeling down, huh?


"???"


Just what was it that has transpired?


As I proceed with this doubt in my heart, I come across yet another surprising development.


Somehow, the savanna is now teaming with clusters of various beasts. Just that... they are all made of papercraft again.


"This is quite a surprising development, isn't it?"


There's no room for doubt; this is all the fairies' doing.


Both this sprawling savanna and the crowd of paperwork dinosaurs that are upon it.


The sight brings to mind the concept of safari parks, which we old humans once used to enjoy.


I spot a stegosaurus sporting some magnificent fins on its back.


In one corner is a splendid specimen of a triceratops.


Is that some manner of pterosaur gliding above me, I wonder?


This place has become a dinosaur sanctuary with an abundance of variety.


Things that would usually stand at ten meters tall now barely reach a height of one meter. In other words, the dinosaurs are all 1:10 scale reproductions.


When I gaze at the horizon, my perspective appears to twist, and I see the illusory silhouettes of more dinosaurs in the distance.


Suddenly, I feel an itching sensation and look down to find a small thirty-centimeter long dinosaur (All of them are small like this though) - wait, it's nipping at my calf, isn't it!


It looks like a chicken, but no, it's actually a dinosaur.


If I'm not mistaken, this one is of the genus deinonychus[8]. In reality, they happen to be three-meter-long carnivores, and tend to hunt other dinosaurs larger than themselves by forming packs.


And this one is quite a classic example of a feathered dinosaur, isn't it? That narrow cape cut into many strips represents the feathers, then?


"Mhmmm, well done. You score ninety points."



Although all it's doing is play-biting me, I can't let this dinosaur nom on me forever, so I give it a light kick away, which sends it running while foaming at the mouth. How cute.


I head to the fairy village while observing the papersaurs around me.


I notice as I look on that the dinosaurs do not attack each other, presumably because they have no physiological need to prey on each other.


There's no chance of conflict due to starvation, is there?


All the dinosaurs around me are in a weirdly relaxed state.


I suppose even the ones that attacked me back then were just being playful, weren't they?


I got quite swept up by previous events, but things are more enjoyable this time around.


I should show the fairies my appreciation.


Anyhow, the present I have with me today is... "Huh?!" My bag, which I'd dropped, has been ransacked.


Let's see what's left.


My sketchbook,


Some pens and pencils,


emergency rations, my canteen,


A handkerchief,


There's only one thing that's missing.


"Wh-why that thing?! Who could have-"


My eyes whip around, but I see no signs of the culprit.


"Oh... oh no..."


I search around for another ten minutes, but, unfortunately, am unable to recover the stolen item.


"Wait, it couldn't be the fairies, could it?"


I am certain they could have taken advantage of the confusion and quickly taken it away, but I don't believe their kind would stoop to theft.


"I don't get it..."


It wasn't the most precious thing, so I'll just drop the issue.


Changing track, I resume my walk and arrive in the village almost immediately.


"Hello, I hope everyone is well..."


"...Things are hellish."


"Mr. Fishroll, you look quite haggard... and it's only been a day, too..."


It seems like he's not the only one affected by this.


The entire village is mired in an air of stagnancy.



"Just what has happened here?"


All the other villagers are depressed as well.


Their population has decreased drastically too.


"...We, lost in the struggle for existence?"


"So you lost?"


"The family jewels are gone too, you know?"


"You had family heirlooms, did you?"


"We did have them you know, these things."


"What do you mean by that?"


"We, we've got no sweets left."


"Are you talking about your snacks?"


The fairy nods.


"Snacks are really important, you see..."


"So, the snacks you fairies usually keep hidden have been stolen?"


"Ah- Alll of eeeeemWscp (talk) 19:44, 18 October 2022 (CEST)!!!!"


He bursts into tears.


"There, there."


I stroke his head softly with the tip of my finger, which puts him into a trance-like state as he stands.


"Wake up, now."


"Hnghnnnn~"


He buries his head into my finger.


"It's a new charm?"


"You shouldn't fall asleep in the middle of a conversation."


"Washn't sleeping."


"You most definitely were."


"Uhngg..."


The fruitless conversation continues.


"Let's get on with it. Now, who stole the candy?"


"Ah, that matter. You know, to tell you the truth..."


And that is where my conversation with Mr. Fishroll ends.




From the village's square, a shriek sounds out.


"The demon!"


"What's the matter?"


"I-It's here, that demon!"


"A demon?"


What I find striding over countless teepees is...


"Ah, that's a giganotosaurus, isn't it?"


Isn't this one the largest of the theropods, one size larger than even that T-rex I saw before?


"Do you know anything about it?" asks Mr. Fishroll.


"Hardly, I'm not one who would enjoy knowing about animals that would tower over me, you know."


"Oho..."


The paper-giganotosaurus has an overall length of about two hundred centimeters. Truly a megalosaurus.


At a glance, it appears to be about eighty to ninety centimeters tall.


It has a menacing air to it, even though it's a mere paper dinosaur.


From the perspective of a ten-centimeter-tall fairy, it must look like a demon indeed.


Mr. Giganotosaur, who has walked boldly into the village has now singled out one of the fairies who didn't get away in time.


"AAAArrrgghhhhh!"


The victim wastes no time in balling up, as the fairies customarily do to defend themselves.


Perhaps they filched this trait off the pillbugs.


Mr Giganotosaur mercilessly bares his fangs at the fairy.


But it seems that balling up really does have its uses as a defence.


Any pair of jaws would have a tough time with a balled up fairy.


Mr Gigantosaur now proceeds to grip his prey in his mouth, toss it overhead, and catch the ball again on its way down. He just wants to play now.


Wow, he isn't just playing; he's even employing various advanced juggling techniques.


"Ah, a header..."


"How skilled..."


Mr Giganotosaur has a real way with the ball.


"Ooh, he's dribbling it now!"


"Dribbling..."


He's got some amazing footwork.


"I wonder what to call that technique where he catches the ball with his tail..."


"I wouldn't know..."



Well that's obvious, isn't it?


Mr victim has given up now and comes out of defence mode.


Looks like he has no way out now.


He does try to run, but the violent tumble he's undergone has messed up his semicircular canals, and he does a sloppy U-turn before crashing into the wall that is Mr Giganotosaur. It is very reminiscent of how cartoons typically end.


Down the hatch. Mr Giganotosaur chomps on the fairy's head and starts chewing.


How cruel.


"I know it's a dog-eat-dog world out there, but still, this is quite disturbing."


"It sure does disturb our sleep," quips Mr. Fishroll.


Soon, Mr. Victim get spat out onto a tent.


"So the fairy was indigestible, eh?"


Looks like Mr. Giganotosaur has skillfully kept exactly what he wants in his mouth, discarding the rest.


What sparkles while being held up in his jaws, as if to show off, is... a piece of caramel wrapped in aluminium foil.


"Isn't that a bog-standard world caramel usually found in UN ration packs?"


I used to like those as a kid.


I don't know about the aluminium foil, but it had many flavours.


"The last caramel's been taken now!"


Satisfied with his spoils, Mr. Giganotosaur leaves the village with an air of contentment.


The danger has passed.


The fairies who had escaped or hidden themselves shamble with listless looks on their faces back to the village square.


It seems this latest attack has again reduced the population of the village.


The fun factor at this village is plummeting rapidly now.


"I see; so the dinosaurs subsist on candy, do they?"


"All the candy in the village is gooone..."


This is the cause of the fairies' despondency, it seeMs


"Mr. Fishroll, I have a question."


"At your service!"


"Didn't you guys create the dinosaurs in the first place?"


"We diiiiddd~"


"What kind of civilization manages to be driven to extinction by its own creations?"


"Ah... To be honest, we did anticipate such questions~"


"Stop fibbing."


In the middle of this standup routine, I realise it.


The culprit who stole from my bag.


The deinonychuses are said to be pack hunters.


And they're said to be pretty smart, as far as dinosaurs go.


To the extent that they could pull off heists by way of a decoy.


"I see... So that's why they attacked me."


"Huh?"


"I had actually brought something with me for you today, you know. Some sweets. But I got waylaid by some of your creations, and my present got stolen.


"...For real?"


"I'm dead serious."


"That's... That's not a laughing matter... You know?"


"I'm not too affected by it; it's just a little candy that got stolen, after all."


Mr. Fishroll stares at me, flabbergasted.


"So... The sweets... They're..."


"Probably in the dinosaurs' bellies now."


He gnashes his teeth.


"It's because you made those things that this happened."


"At this rate, we're done for... Our hobby creations will bring about our downfall..."


"Serves you right. And you're going to be defeated by things powered with rubberbands, you know."


"We're a tad fond of rubber bands, so."


These fairies have no sense of crisis.


"Cap!"



One of the fairies listening to our conversation gets up with a cry.


The fairy that has gotten up has a primitive javelin tipped with a stone tool similar to an arrowhead and is wearing a buffalo skull helmet. Incidentally, the stone tool and the skull helmet are both fashioned from paper (Quite the contradiction).


"Oh, if it isn't Mr. Cap!"


"Yes, that's my nickname!"


So it is only a nickname?



It's been a while. You've got quite a tan as well, I see."


"There's been some trouble, ya know?"


"Well then, what seems to be the problem?"


Mr. Cap steps forth and addresses his depressed compatriots thusly:


"Weeeee're goooooing on a huuuunt!"


Everybody lifts their heads up at once.


"A hunt?" "A raid?" "So if we participate, we're hunter-gatherers?" "It sure is nice being alive, huh?" "We have to hunt to live."


It's dinosaur season.


In this chilly village where the sugar's sweetness has long been lost, just one word from Cap has moved the hearts of the populace.


Ah, I wonder if perhaps, at last, the fairies will have some event that will mark a point of strife in their cultural history?


I would have no choice but to accept this truth if such were the case.


Though it may be better for me to keep such a truth hidden.


"Look here!" says Cap, holding up his weapon. "With this spear!"


"OOhhh~"


Everyone is invigorated.


"With this spear!" cries Mr. Cap spiritedly while brandishing his spear. "Weee! Shallll! Fiiiiight!" He performs a series of sharp thrusts. "And like thiiiiis!" Finally, he sends the spear spinning to the heavens above his head. "The HEAVEEeeeeeeenssss SHAAa-uhn~" he falters - the spear bounces off his head and stickes itself into the ground.


"..." (He's passed out peacefully)


The venue is silent for a moment.


"EEEeeek!" "He's deaad!" "This is something serious!" "He got shut down!" "That naivete is a serious turn-off!" -- There's chaos everywhere.


"I really did think you died for a second..."


Mr. Cap gets up again while holding his head.


"You were doing pretty well until about halfway through."


"Ooooh..."


Mr. Cap, who has raised the spirits of the others, takes up his spear once more, and leads the villagers in their advance.


"I've defeated one of 'em myself!"


Ahh... I forgot that those of the fairy race tend to fib like this.



"With that spear?" "He got his candy back?" "Can we do it?" "If we can't..." "perhaps..." "If we poked at them with our spears? Could we get ours back too?" "Is this the beginning of the candy revolution?" "So we need to use our spears a lot?" "That's right, that's right!" "So... We need to fold up some spears?" "We need to fold spears." "To fold spears, we need..."


Everybody's whispers are moving towards the same conclusion: "Origami!"


They all run towards a particularly large tent with great excitement.


"Over there, we have tools for origami," says Mr. Fishroll.


"Are you not going as well?"


"Sometimes, it's nice to just accept one's impending doom too."


What a miserable existence.


"You're a real masochist, aren't you?" I ask as I flick at him with my finger.


(I feel dirty translating this) Ahh... More... Use me... Keep toying with me..."


I really like this little guy.


He's really interesting, so I think I should keep him under observation.


The fairies are conducting a ceremony to kick off the hunt.


Surrounding an altar and a pillar of fire is a large crowd of fairies engaged in a ritual dance.


Mr. Cap, who has donned the raiment of a witch doctor, is dancing fanatically in the center.


They're all in a trance. Everyone is entirely at ease.


Each fairy now has a spear in its hands.



The spears look like parasol chocolates[9], with paper rolled up around thin strips of bamboo.


It is quite admirable that the entire village is willing to fight in the face of such grave danger.


"I'm putting down thirty jellybeans towards the village getting destroyed after you all are beaten up," I prophecize mercilessly.


Sotto voce, so they don't hear.


The ceremony soon ends, and Mr. Cap announces to me: "We're off then, Ms. Human!"


"Oh, but I'm coming with you to watch." 


"Well, I'll be..."


I've come this far; I can't skip the ending at this point.



"Well, let's go then!" "YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!"


The primitive village's dinosaur subjugation forces leave the village in droves, their spears at the ready.


I slowly follow from behind as well.


The papercraft dinosaurs live all over the savanna.


The subjugation force meets its first quarry in an instant.


"We've found one!" "That thing, eh?" "It's rather large..." "It's probably strong..."


It's quite right to say it looks mighty.


Its skin is armored, and with a club-like appendage at the tip of its tail, this Ankylosaurus has fittingly been called the tank of the Cretaceous period.


This papercraft ankylosaurus is about eighty centimeters long.


It's squatting, with all four legs planted on the ground.


"What do we do?" "What indeed..." "Will we do it?" "Are we going to?" "If we're doing it, we'd better get to it!" "Let's do it." "I'll do it!" "Let's do it, come on!"


The subjugation force has chosen quite a formidable opponent for its first kill.


They're choosing the hard way right from the start.


It's called a tank, but the ankylosaurus is a herbivore. And so, from its armor to its tail, every part of its body is built for self-defense.


In fact, even a tyrannosaurus would not be able to escape fractures if it got hit by that bony flail of a tail.


There are other possibilities that could be gleaned from the fossils discovered so far, but such discoveries are still left in the dark due to mankind having lost its steam.


"Heave-ho!"


The members of the subjugation force leap spiritedly towards this formidable enemy whose lumbering body is covered in multiple layers of defences.


Many fairies thrust their spears into its back... but its thick armour stops their blades.


At the same time, Mr Ankylo rears up. His long tail stretches taut behind him.


Standing on his hind legs, he bends his forelegs somewhat unsteadily.


Then, while balancing himself with his tail, he dashes off at a speed that belies his ungainly form.


"... So they modelled this one based on that theory, huh?"


There was a theory that the ankylosaurus used its tail not as a weapon, but as a counterweight to aid in walking upright.



Mr Ankylo leaves the scene with a few of the fairies that had attacked his back with their spears in tow.


As for the remaining fairies - "It escaped?" "It skedaddled." "Did we win?" "We won?" "Looks like it." "It's our victory then." "We won!" "VICTORYYYYY!"


Wait, I thought you guys were trying to kill the dinosaurs.


"We'll keep up the pace like this."


Morale has improved, so all's well that ends well, I guess.


After continuing for a short distance, we come across the next target.


Quite a tough dinosaur this time as well.


It's got a slim profile, with powerful jaws, and its fearsome talons on both legs are conspicuous.


Its brilliant blue plumage makes it look less like a reptile and more like a bird.


Clearly, this is a hunter that excels in agility and shows no mercy.


Its body is about... fifteen centimeters long.


"... It's small."


It's a Velociraptor.


It's one of the smaller carnivorous dinosaurs.


And again, its length of fifteen centimeters also includes its tail.


It's actually shorter in stature than the fairies.


About the size of a large dog when compared to a human.


"This one's small!" "It's a pipsqueak!" "Can we win?" "Looks like we can." "Is it going to be an easy win?" "There's only one, too." "God wants us to kill it?"


Looks like they believe this will be a cakewalk.


Sure enough, they point their spears forward. They're ready for battle.


"Assault!"


Mr. Cap's spear easily pierces Mr. Raptor, who is standing upright.


However, the absent-minded Mr. Raptor... He isn't dead yet.


"Oh my." I give the puzzled Mr. Cap a tip: "You have to cut its rubber bands!"


"Ahh, right."


After being stabbed a few times, the raptor's rubber bands are cut.


Mr. Raptor falls on his back as he lets out a papery death rustle.


"Oh, I hunted it!" "He hunted it!" "We hunted it!" "Are we perhaps born hunters?"



No, you're comical lifeforms with the heartwarming gene.


Well, that aside, a victory is a victory.


Just as I think things are going surprisingly well, something that comes out of a hole from my left cancels that thought.


I could describe the scene with some picturesque words.


But let me attempt to describe things more simply.


What has come out of that hollow?


Nothing but a hundred and sixty-seven velociraptors (I've counted them).


"EEEEeek?!"


The subjugation force is filled with dread.


The raptors have the aura of bullies about them and truly look like a group of evil ruffians.


Ah, this is going to be a rout.


"EVERYBODY, FIIIIIIGHT!"


At Mr. Cap's order, everyone prepares their weapons, even though they are bewildered.


As for the raptors, they proceed to intimidate the fairies.


The raptors look towards us and open their toothy mouths as if to swallow the fairies up.




Mr. Cap drops his spear.


The army of hooligan dinosaurs immediately sets upon the fairies, who have all but lost their will to fight.


"Noooooo!" "Iyaaaa!" "Aidez-moi!" "Stoooop!" "Ahhh! Noooo!" "Uhhhnnnn" "Would we taste good as evening snacks?!"


No, you wouldn't.


Besides, you're the ones that created these papersaurs in the first place.


Even when their prey has no sweets, the raptors show no mercy in their play.


Since the fairies only number forty, they cannot match the enemy in numbers. They're being overwhelmed, trampled down and tossed about, a full course of torment.


"Ah! My Goddess!"



"... What a troublesome bunch you are."


I really want to keep my involvement to a minimum, but it seems like the primitive times game will end if I don't do something, so I will help out just a little.


I take out the self-defence tool I have in my bag.


The papersaurs won't stand a chance against this thing.


First, I ignite the fuse with a flint.


"Here goes!"


I throw the tool into the center of the conflict, and after several seconds, it explodes with a fierce report.


It's a firework.


Ten seconds after the gunpowder has been expended and everything has burned up, the savanna is filled with balled-up fairies as well as knocked-out velociraptors.


"A single-handed victory."


Ufufu.


The fairies are beginning to stir.


As usual, none have the slightest clue why they fainted.


When I explain that I killed all the dinosaurs, the fairies believe me without question.


They're all looking at me, their eyes filled with devoution.


"I knew it, Ms. Human! You really are God, aren't you?"


"Think of how the real God would feel about you supplanting them with me!"



"Here!"


Mr. Cap offers up the origami helmet he is wearing reverentially.


It's way too small for me, though.


"Thank you... But you've lost your trademark accessory now, haven't you?"


"Well, we don't really think our identities are very important..."


"You should, though..."


"I could make another?" he says as he points to a pile of raptor shells(?).


I see. You're going to use the skull of your prey as a headpiece?


So the concept of witchcraft, something like imitative magic or mimetic magic is now beginning to appear, is it?


The fairies are turning towards the dark side.


"Everyone, let's get to it!" Mr. Fishroll directs the other fairies to dismantle the spoils of the hunt.


"Mr. Fishroll, what do you mean when you say 'dismantle'?"


"Something like this?"


The fairies grab parts that are glued on and pry them apart with stone blades.


Looks like the strategy is to turn the raptors back into piles of paper and rubber bands.


The papercraft is dismantled in a jiffy.


Astonishingly, each dinosaur is composed of only a single piece of paper and some rubber bands.


Inside the opened body, rubber bands stretch crisscrossed about, bundled together like muscle fibres.


So this is how the dinosaurs could make such precise movements. Even rubber bands can be used for long periods of autonomous movement if precisely tuned.


"From here!" "Here too!" "I hear you~" "a miss~" "It's a miss this side~" "It's a miss, but in a good way~" "It's a perfect miss~" "A miss is a miss, as good as it gets~" "Ahh, it's a miss, isn't it?" "So it is, so it is." "It was a miss it when I saw it." "Nothing but misses here, huh?"


The word "miss" is thrown about casually as they continue taking the papercraft apart.


If there are misses, maybe there are also hits... Ah, looks like they found one.


"Jackpot!"


As I watch, one fairy lets out a shout and presents what was hidden within one papercraft carcass.



I join the fairies gathered around and lean in for a closer look.


"Ah, this-!"


This cube wrapped in aluminium foil... it's a world caramel!


The world caramel. It's a standard ration item issued by the UN for priority distribution to children worldwide. Its purpose is to add more carbohydrates into children's diets, so one can get some of it via an application even if they don't have ration tickets.


The most salient feature of the world caramel is... its enormous proportions.


It measures three centimeters on a side.


One can feel the UN's determination through it.


But, because it is such a common snack, people quickly get tired of it. And so, the abandoned caramels have somehow found their way into the stomachs of these papercraft dinosaurs.


"They hide the candy inside their bodies," says Mr. Cap.


"It doesn't seem like they actaully digest it... Do they just hide it inside their bodies?"


Yes, so they can be found by someone, somewhere."


THe fairy who found the caramel holds it overhead and skips about.


"A miss~" "It's a miss." "Uh-huh, it's a miss again~" "A hit!"


This is in another area.


"It's no good..." "It's empty inside." "There's nothing." "It's another miss" "AH! I found one!" "I've struck candy here as well!"


It seems the dinosaurs that are hits are all rather obese.


There's a dense pile of sweets now.


Caramels, candy balls, bell castellas[10], monakas[11], tiny donuts and fugashi[12]....


"There's a lot!" "It's quite satisfying." "What an impressive catch, eh?" "Hunting might actually be really nice." "By living and hunting, we will gain charisma.[13]"


The fairies are all very happy.


"How many are left?"


"This one's the last!"


Only one raptor is left to be dismantled.


"Then, let's all fold up a box," says Mr. Cap.


"YEAAAAH!"


The disassembled raptors are folded along their crease lines once more.


Just by changing the way the complex and mysterious bits and pieces of the little dinosaur model are folded, the paper has transformed into a box. Abracadabra, alakazam, it's a box the size of a cigarette pack now.


"What about rubber bands?" "Put them in the boxes~" "And then..." "Put the sweets in~" "All done?" "No..."



It looks like a commodity product, as if that was a consideration since the time the dinosaurs were first designed.


The following words are emblazoned on top:


The good kid's animal snacks (One papercraft model) ~ Third period[14] 。 Dinosaur Edition ~


"I'm sorry, but this looks really contrived."


"Huh?"


"Why are you making these boxes, and why are you making it look so easy?"


Even nonsense has its limits.


"chi~?"


"Just what are you trying to do, making boxes that look like they're to be put on sale?"


They're completely upending the free market.


"Ah.. Uh... But- but... Even though it is mainly just papercraft, if we don't mark it as being a snack, we can't put it up at the convenience stores!"


"What's a convenience store?"


"... Yeah, what's a convenience store again?"


"I'm the one asking you that!"


This is giving me a headache.


"But still, just as it is, if it were sold on the market, this item would surely be in high demand, wouldn't it?"


"That's right, that's right!" (in a triumphant tone)


"By making the outer box a part of a set, you're encouraging people to collect all the items, huh? That's quite a clever play."


"Are you angry at us?"


"I'm actually impressed, in a way."


"Uhhoho~"


In a jiffy, all the raptors have been turned into packages.


But it seems like there's one last problem left.


"Leader! Leader, we don't have enough sweets for each box!" "That's too bad~" "But that's bothersome?" "I really want to get more candy now."


So, they realised it, eh?


"You guys have such crazy technological prowess, so why don't you also just make your own sweets?"


All of a sudden, every fairy stops what it's doing and stares at me.


"Wh...What?"



Mr. Fishroll answers me on the verge of tears.


"We... we're no good at it."


"No good?"


"They... somehow never come out right!" "They're always horrible!" "We do want to make them..." "But we always fail..." "I wonder why..." "Who knows~" "I don't get the theory behind sweets."


What a strange race.


"You're the best there is for sweets, Ms. Human."


"So that's why you treated the sweets I brought you as precious family heirlooms?"


Sweets are quite a valuable commodity, it seems.


"By the way, when were the first-period and the second-period collections released?"


"They didn't come out."


"So you suddenly decided to start with the third period?"


"Not really..." "Uh-huh~" "How can we explain it..." "What did we do first..." "Who knows..." "We've forgotten that, huh?" "I think I have a dim idea of it..." "Well, shoot then~" "I think... surely... at first, we were sitting around at the roots of the world tree... and then...."


That one fairy is saying some pretty outrageous things.


"Pho...to...synthetic...pro...karyotes, we made those first."


"Beg pardon?"


I think I heard something like "photosynthetic prokaryotes" just now...


"We wondered if we could make them with origami, and we ended up making them when we gave it a try."


That shouldn't be possible, normally.


But maybe it is... They are fairies, after all.


All of a sudden, things grow chaotic.


"And then, there was a lot of oxygen, right? And we thought, 'We shouldn't have to wait for evolution to happen', ya know?" "Yeah, something like that" "We sure did speed it up, didn't we?" "It just happened on the way" "We did, we did!" "Eukaryotes, and then multicellular organisms.. coellies, then spongies... then annies..." "And after that, we let it all run on auto." "You've got quite the memory on ya, huh?" "Ah, you know, I'll forget again soon enough." "When was that again?" "It was a million years ago!" "If one thing had gone wrong, we all wouldn't exist!" "Never forget!" "Speaking of..." "Ms. Human, talking your language is super hard..." "It's hard to say what you mean, isn't it?" "Still, it's nice, innit?" "Sure is, sure is."


"Basic as a whistle, with the aesthetics of a beefsteak, it's like target practice for societal integration!"




"<「基本的」fundamental (basic)/steam whistle>, < 「美的」 aesthetics /beefsteak>, <「社会的」 (a fundamental requirement of society / a requirement for target practice?!)>"


"coellies... spongies.... and... annies?"


Coelenterates. Sea sponges. Annelids.




As far as lineups for early multicellular organisms go, I think they're quite good.


Wait, so... If these papercraft pseudo-lifeforms were used to recreate evolution...


"Things moved really fast after that, huh?" "It was crazy fast; happened in an instant!" "It was such an interesting experience, wasn't it?"


I wonder if it really is possible to recreate evolution like that, with just origami...


I stop myself from thinking about it too deeply.


"Ah?!"


At this moment, the fairy taking the final raptor apart lets out a shout.


"What's happening?" "Trouble?!" "What is it? what is it?!" "It's a field day for all us rubberneckers!"


"Look what I found!"


The thing that fairy is holding up high.


That thing, it's a-!


"Wow, how about that. A shiny."


A highly sought-after caramel that is rarely found hidden amongst the others.


A golden caramel.


Ahh, its wrapper has such a divine, golden glow! How dazzling.


"Ooooooooopoooooohhhhh...."


The fairies grow lively.


"If you send that wrapper to the UN, they'll give you a can of sweets. A big, big one, like this," I say, stretching my hands out.


"Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh~"


The fairies begin writhing about.


"This is the first time I've seen a golden caramel myself, you know."


Oh, by the way, even if you only find a silver wrapper, you can still get a can of sweets if you send in five of those.


Unfortunately, unlike the gold ones, the silvers are based on a lottery.


Either way, the prize would take a few months to arrive, wouldn't it?


But waiting for stuff like this to come can be enjoyable too.


Well, I'll refrain from doing anything boorish.


"Would you like me to post it for you? The wrapper, I mean."


"Please!"


I accept the wrapper.


I wonder what kind of can it will be... I can't help but be curious.


"Everyone! Here's to our success!"






Mr. Cap is especially spirited.


"Yeeeaaah!" "Let's goooo!" "I'm pumped!" "We're gonna bulldoze 'em all!"





And so, hunting culture earned a mythical status in fairy culture.


Papersauruses, which come with a chance of bearing candy, are now a valuable source of sustenance.


The fairies have understood now that they have no choice but to hunt.


It has reached the point where the villagers do nothing but hunt all day with their stone tools.


New stone tools were invented in quick succession, and more efficient hunting methods were developed.


Even the ones who weren't hunting would go foraging for wild strawberries and gummy nuts, leading to a sharp increase in the number of available sweets.


That's right.


The fairies are now splendid hunter-gatherers.


The once dwindling village population is now seeing a dramatic boom once more.


The golden caramel has become a legend.


Because I sent the wrapper off to the UN, they couldn't worship it directly. Instead, they created an idol to worship in the wrapper's place.


The idol depicts a heroic figure holding up the golden caramel.


Religion has taken over the village's identity.


As the village keeps developing, it seems like it won't be long before urbanization also occurs.


"Safari partyyyy! Advance!"


The fairies have defeated several powerful enemies.


And so they go, to score some more sw33t l00t.


The stegosaurus (a herbivore).


"We've struck marshmallows!"


The Allosaurus.


"Aloe candy!"


The Iguanadon.


"Hand-made potato chips!"


The Epanterias.


"Karintou!" [15]


"Advance, steady!"


It truly is a steady advance.


And finally, they stand in front of the crown prince of the dinosaur kingdom.


"It's time! Hunt 'im down!"


"Hooah!"


The fairies in the crowd throw their spears at the tyrannosaurus-rex whose legs are caught in a pitfall trap.


They keep at it until their prey is weakened.


Hunting by trapping and throwing spears has a much-improved success rate over a crowd of fairies jumping on their prey.


Even the T-rex, mighty predator as it may be, cannot withstand such an onslaught.


Shivering as if gasping for air, it lays down, never to rise again.


It's cruel, but this is what they call survival of the fittest. They're all just made of paper, though.


Mr. Cap leaps onto the large body and pulls out the heart hidden within the sacrifice.


It seems rather hefty - "Wha- this thing's real heavy!"



He pulls it out.


It appears.


"The sacrifice..."


It's a bar of chocolate.


But of course, it is no ordinary chocolate bar.


... It's a very peculiar chocolate bar.


It gives off such a solid first impression that it seems appropriate to refer to it as "Chogoreito"[16], as they used to call it in Japanese.



But can anyone wear a T-shirt with such text on it while smiling so naturally? Impossible, right?[17] You get what I mean? I'm honestly quite confused about it too.


Let me describe this chocolate bar clearly, in more words than there are in this book's character description section for you.


Firstly, it's enormous.


The once popular chocolate bar vanished from the markets with the demise of material civilization.


But old confectionary cookbooks still have pictures of them, so we know what they looked like in the past.


Chocolate bars usually weigh between seventy to a hundred and twenty grams.


And this Shougoreito's[18] (the characters change depending on the mood) weight comes out to a whopping five hundred grams.


You can't simply break it with a strike; this thing resembles some manner of armored plating more than a chocolate bar.


But instead of having a fitting name such as choco-plate-mail, embossed in blunt white lettering over its brown wrapper is this word: "CHOCOLATE".




Looking at it again, I see it's got the UN's watermark.


It seems this thing is being manufactured at the behest of the UN's leadership.


Filled with energy and easy to digest, it seems this sweet will always pull through and splendidly save people's lives when the time comes.


Which is to say, it's an emergency ration item.


This armor plate-esque chocolate bar is meant to protect people from that invisible bullet known as starvation.


Oh, that line's going into my memoires.


Anyway, since this is an emergency ration distributed solely to regions affected by famine, it isn't easy to get one's hands on it in more fortunate places.


We can only occasionally get some of it in exchange for ration tickets.


And even that isn't in one piece - it was always broken up - rather sadly.


These things are made large and thick, bringing joy just by being held in one's hands. Truly a killer item for any child. A whole bar of this stuff. Frankly, it's a precious thing.


I'm sure this is the first time the fairies have seen such a thing as well.


The fairies have collectively forgotten to pick their jaws up after dropping them.


"This is insane..." "Impossible..." "HORY SHITTO"[19] "... Am I dreaming?" "... Is it a trap?" "... Am I seeing things?" "Have we been bamboozled?" "Or is it just that... marvelous?" "It's so big... It's just bewildering."


"It's not a monster, is it?" "If I think about it calmly, I just get excited again!" "If you think rationally, there's only one thing you can say..." "and that's...." "this is..."


The wave of bewilderment washes over the fairies and leaves behind an explosion of delight.


"It's a mega-chocolate bar!"


It is a spectacle that symbolizes an era of wild enthusiasm.


The recovered mega-chocolate bar is instantly the talk of the village.


The populace's expectations are heightened furthermore by the sight of the gargantuan candy bar, carried on the backs of eight fairies.


There's no thought given to preserving it for later. They haven't the bandwidth in their minds for it. There's only one thing they can do: eat it all.


Of course, they still need to figure out how to eat it.


The fairies hold a conference to decide, as they usually do.


"Cut it?" "Will we?" "Are we cutting it up?" "Let's spread it out to everyone!" "But it feels like a waste to cut it up..." "UUUUhhhhhggggg I wanna eat itWscp (talk)" "Misete-kure[20], I just don't get what to do..." "My heart, it aches!"

"It's haaarddd"


They are absolutely flummoxed.


"Ms. Human, isn't there a proper way to eat this thing?" asks Mr. Fishroll while flapping his arms at me.


"I think it would be fun to just break it up and eat it as is, but, well now.... With such a quantity of raw chocolate, one could make all kinds of sweets..."


Mr. Fishroll sighs and holds his knees close, deep in thought. "You said many kinds...."


He gives me a look as if he just realized something outrageous.


"So there could be more sweets?!"


"I suppose there could, but... Ah, now that I think of it, I could also do things with almonds. And with the amount of raw material we have, there's definitely a lot of sweets I could make..."


"Are... are you a mage?" "If this mega chocolate bar could multiply, that would be happiness?" "But... That's impossible?" "It would be a miracle if it did?" "You can do miracles?" "Then, let a miracle happen." "I, I can't hold myself back for long." "I'm okay with just breaking it up, too." "But having a variety of sweets would be nice, huh?" "Think of it as an investment, an investment!" "Ms. Human, Ms. Human!"


"What is it?"


"HERE!"


The fairies come together and present the chocolate bar to me.


All right, all right, I'll just make you some sweets, and it'll all be fine, yes?


And so, here I am, on my way back home.


Sweets take quite a lot of time to prepare, in and of themselves.


If I dawdle, it'll be dark before I know it.


It's even possible that this entire primitive landscape could disappear overnight.


So I need to get back home early today.


"... It's eleven, is it?"


I think I can manage if I hurry.


Naturally, my gait quickens, but - "Oh?" - I spy something strange on the way.


I part a thicket to see what is rustling about within.



"Kruk"


It says something.


It's sort of like a bird.


Five centimeters long.


"Mmhm, with this size, and these details, I rate it 95 points."


It's well made.


If I were asked if it is a bird, though, I would be at a loss. It looks half like a dinosaur.


But with its flaired feathers and long, straight tail, it gives me a sense of deja-vu.


"Kruk?"


And also, it's crying out. It's a fully-voiced type.


The papersauruses didn't have this feature, did they.


"... Which means this is a new one?"


I suppose the fairy in charge of planning is hard at work developing these things.


"Kruk-kruu"


And with such parting words(?), Mr. Suspicious Bird scampered away into the thicket.


Looks like it isn't very good at flight.


This five-centimeter creature would, in reality, have been one that spanned half a meter long, back when it wasn't extinct.


It might be a descendant of the pterosauruses [21].


There's something still bothering me, but I can't find the words for it.


"Ah, look at the time! I need to hurry."


I just have to make those sweets.


Flustered, I leg it for the remainder of the journey home.


Choco-crunch bars, steamed chocolate cake, chocolate bits, roast almonds coated in chocolate, donuts....


The entire lineup ended up consuming the rest of the day.


I have made enough to fill an entire basket.


Lifting it is a little like doing a weightlifter's workout.


The next day, I leave for the primitive village with the heavy sweets basket in my hands.


One day's worth of time can be the same as an entire month or even a year for a fairy.


Perhaps this is due to the difference in their lifespan.




To find the village in shambles today would definitely not go down well with me.


For them, a boring day is akin to an unbearable void in their life.


And so, there is a chance that even if I go all the way to their village today, I may only find the remains of a civilization that went as far as it could possibly go.


Please, fairies, don't run away.


As I walk while praying for good fortune, I notice something moving at the edge of the savanna.


"... Yet another new creation."


There's a bird, about twenty centimeters long. It resembles a muscular ostrich.


It is holding a chocolate bar it got from somewhere in its large mouth.


I'm guessing, based on the bar's size, that it is a ration bar, not a commercial product.


Ration menus differ between areas, so perhaps the fairies got their hands on some adjacent region's stuff, which this bird snatched up.


The bird is covered in plain-looking paper.


Based on its scale, the real thing would have been about two meters from head to tail, I think?


It isn't an ostrich, then.


Anyhow, it's a scale model of some creature that existed in the distant past.


It gobbles the chocolate bar up with a flick of its beak, then calmly struts off.


"If you're that defenseless, you're going to get attacked by some dinosaur, you know."


"Growwwayy!"


It lets out a weird hiccup of a cry.


It's giving me the impression that it wants to keep its distance.


"Grro-woww, uwayyy-ayy!"


It vanishes into the sea of grass while muttering to itself.


"... I was already leaving, though..."


As one would expect of an absurd life-form.


But, starting with that small bird from yesterday, it seems like the birds are multiplying; I wonder why.


"Huh... Ah, right, maybe it's the fourth great age..."


"The good kid's animal snacks ( One papercraft model ) ~ Fourth Period 。 Bird Edition ~"


I suppose it would be something like that, wouldn't it.


There are fairies who create these beasts, and there are fairies that hunt them down.




Ah, no, no. It's a matter of cause and effect.


In any case, maybe because the fairies have brought out this new series, there's not a single papersaurus in sight today.


But since it would be bad if I got the sweets I'm carrying snatched away like last time, I suppose it's a good thing.


It's a calm day.


"Hello!"


"Ah, it's Ms. Human! Arriving any minute now!"


Oh joy, the village is safe and sound.


A large group of fairies gathers at my feet in an instant.


"I see you're all doing very well."


"We're right chipper!" "Maybe too chipper?" "we're livin' our lives lively though." "We look like a bunch of hobos." "Why are we even alive..." "It's a mystery!" "It's a mystery how we're still alive." "Actually, perhaps, we aren't." "Maybe, the entire world's just a delusion in my head" "I've only been alive since yesterday." "Come to think of it, I'm actually alive."


"Oh me oh my..."


It seems they have many differing value systems.


Though there were some rather unsavory ones amongst them.


"Well, I'm glad you are all well. By the way..." I place the basket in front of me. "What do you think this is?"


"Whatever could it be..." "What is it?" "A basket?" "Well, it is a basket..." "But isn't it really a basket?"


"It is a basket. I'm asking all of you what's inside it. Did you think about that?"


"A quiz, huh?" "An exam, even." "Iunno~" "Is it a difficult question?"


"A difficult one..."


I brought it here at your request though.


"It smells good." "Feels irresistible." "It stirs me up" "Can I look inside?"


"Of course!"


The fairies opened the basket.


"Wooooaaaaaaaahhhh" "It's chocolate!" "There sure is a lot, isn't it?" "It's got a sweet, heartrending feeling to it" "Mind if I dig in?"


"Go right ahead. It's something you fairies requested, after all."


"Really?"


The fairies look at me in surprise.


The chocolate party begins.


The fairies of the village quickly gather, curious.




"Woahhh" "Chocolate!" "There's so much!" "Can we have any?"


The village square is instantly covered in fairies.


It seems there are no fairies here who don't know me.


It's an unexpectedly hollow victory.


"But, even though the population has increased, the village doesn't look more developed for it, does it?"


"Izzatso?"


It's good that the village is still here, but it feels like its evolution has stagnated.


Things moved so fast the last time that the present state is a bit of a let-down.


I'm not sure what to make of this.


But if they remain stable, it is easier to record data about them, and my life will be made simple.


Is this how fairies usually are?


And is this what I'm supposed to do as part of my job?


It's hard to judge.


"By the way, you fairies."


"Wha' iff ih?" "Yes?" "A question?" "We'll answer with an answer."


"The fourth-period series looks to be in good shape, hmm? The models are more polished, and you've managed to make the paper look even more realistic."


Blank stares all around.


"... The fourth period." "What's a fourth period?" "wazzat?" "Was there such a thing?" "Doesn't seem like it..."


"Are you sure you're not just forgetting? I've seen two of them now, those papercraft birds."


"Uhmm..." "Did we ever make those?" "Anybody know?" "I got nothin'" "We have no memories of it?" "Maybe the secretary did it?" "Or was it a mass resignation?" [22]


"You've gotten a splendid case of mass amnesia, haven't you all?"


And what's a secretary got to do with any of this anyway. Ah, well, not like I can do anything about it.


The party soon ends.


"Ms. Human, you've gone above and beyond for us."


"Not at all..."


"How could we ever repay you for your service?"


"Wha-?"


Even if you ask me, though... This is really putting me on the spot.


"Well, how about you do your best in the hunts?"


"I see" "Quite right." "If we're hunting, we have to do it right." "Yeah..." "So, let's go?" "Right on!" "It's a hunt! It's a hunt!" "It'll be good if we get a good catch."



The fairies really want to hunt, it seems.


They are extremely spirited about it.


"Fufu."


Things feel very pleasant.


"If this hunt goes well, maybe we can get back at Ms. Human as well!"


"I thing you meant to say 'give back to' there."


"Okaaayyy"


The hunting party moves towards the savanna in droves.


The endless savanna stretches vast today as well.


But this savanna isn't actually endless; it's just that the contours of the surrounding ruins, which would usually hide the horizon, are not visible anymore.


And even this is not exactly the case. If you were to strain your eyes, you would see a faint unevenness far into the distance.


It seems that this savanna is gradually expanding itself day by day.


Humans just cannot comprehend the fairies' abnormally advanced technology.


From my conversations with them, there are times when even they do not understand themselves. Still, sometimes, one can see glimpses of their unfathomably vast intellects lurking behind the morsels of knowledge they reveal off-hand.


Indeed, they are a wonderous race.


Sadly, their intelligence does not reveal itself unless they have sufficient numbers.


And even when they do gather, they tend to scatter at the drop of a hat. A momentary miracle.


If their society makes great strides, it is only due to the infinitesimal quanta of probability that appear as mirages within the interstices between their individual and collective selves.


I have understood one thing now as I walk alongside them on this savanna.


My guidance was never needed to help develop this primitive village.


A mediator's job is not to rule or control the fairies but to act as a liaison, only when required.


To mediate interactions when vital, to foster lasting relationships, to earn their trust, and to bring any problems that arise to a speedy resolution.


And though there may have been some heart-rending tragedies between humans and fairies in our history, we are past such conflicts now.


It's a detail I had missed from since before I was hired. One need not do anything. Watching over the fairies doing as they will is all that needs to be done. After all, we're nothing but bystanders who have lost the real game of evolution.


This was from back when the fairies were first sighted. Namely, when the UN Mediation Council was founded, they had over a hundred and twenty-six articles in their rulebook to make judgments with the utmost caution and composure.


After a couple of centuries, most of those articles became outmoded and were gradually removed.


Nowadays, only a few of the original tenets still remain.


There aren't any penalties in this job, and there's nothing they can even fire you for either.


It's a job in name alone.


Even so, there is one rule remaining that has endured the ravages of time.


Article Three: Mediators shall engage in the following activities under the supervision of their department heads.

1. Mediators must attempt to establish cordial relationships with other races in their areas of operation.

2. In the event of any disastrous incident concerning other races, mediators must report to their supervisors while also taking appropriate steps.

3. Upon observing disruptive events such as heinous acts against other races, genocide, or war, mediators must report to their superiors while simultaniously investigating the underlying cause. Furthermore, if it is not possible to secure the support of the council in such matters, mediators must exercise their judgment as per the limitations and possibilities afforded for the particular situation and attempt to achieve a peaceful resolution.

Article three, clause three.


This provision lives on even now as a mediator's sole guiding principle.


Maybe I've been treading on thin ice by sparking blooms of urban development and introducing the concept of hunting to the fairies.


So, it can't be bad that the fairies have stabilized themselves into a low-tech state.


That's right. It isn't stagnation; it's stability. Hooray for stability.


Let the fairies maintain themselves at this level. That is undoubtedly the right path.


It'll make it easier to track their movements too.


"Prey spotted!"


One fairy raises its voice.


Where it points is a papercraft mammoth basking in the sunlight.


"Oh, a mammoth. From what they call the fifth age, I presume. Ufufu. I wonder which side would win if we pitted them against the dinosaurs."


I pose a rather childish question.


One fairy answers without missing a beat.


"Oh, the 'saurs all died."


In but a single night, the time of the mammals has come! (I'm super thrown off at this)


History has advanced while I wasn't looking. By several millions of years, no less.


Anyhow, a quadratic function is a function whose value is proportional to the square of its inputs, isn't it? (I'm saying a perfectly logical thing right now, but my mind is a mess)


"It's way too fast... The ages are just zipping by..."


I should have known when I saw those strange birds.


Seriously, the new mankind has been quite unpredictable these days.


"Right then, let's get on with the hunt!" "A Huntuntunt!" "I'll herd it to the trap over there." "GOgoGOgoGOgo...."


The assault begins.


The spears whizz through the air and sink into the mammoth.


The mammoth in turn, lets out a trumpeting cry, and makes to run the other way -- right into the mouth of a pitfall trap.


The rest happens as usual.


The attacks continue until the mammoth's last breath, when Mr. Cap, wearing his signature origami buffallo-skull lands the killing blow.


The fairies crowd in expectantly and take the mammoth apart.


And what they found within is...


"...Have I seen this elsewhere?"


A home-made waffle wrapped in an airtight cover to keep it fresh.


The wrapper is covered in familiar drawings of cute fairies doing various things...


"That's one hundred percent something I made, isn't it?!"


I feel like I've just lost all my money to a rigged lottery.


This world... somehow, it seems very small now.


"Whassamatter? It's a big catch, ya know?"


"No, nothing's wrong... I'm just a little tired."


If I were to hazard a guess, what was stolen by the deinonychus corps has been passed down the food chain, and has finally appeared from within this mammoth.


"Take it as a gift of gratitude? Our gratitude?"


"... Thaaaanks."


What a hollow gift I have been given, a waffle I made in the first place.



I tear open the wrapper and take a bite, an uncouth, inelegant bite.


It's somewhat dampened, but the world's tastiest grid pattern fills my mouth in a localized burst of joy.


"Makes me want some black tea..."


I think I'd be able to gulp it all down if there were some right now.


"All right, let's fold it up!" "Fold it, fold it!" "The collection's expanding nicely, isn't it!" "Turning it into a box and putting candy in is fun?" "I'm cutting more!" "Seems like we really like hunting, huh?"


It would be nice if these fairies didn't evolve in some weird direction, though.


"Inn the Moooorniiiiing Suuuuuun, Aaaaas it Shooooould, the Maaaaammoooooooth, it Gliiiiiiistennnnnnns, AAAnd A FOUR!"


A loud victory song is sung on the march back.



Again, I spot it within a gap in the thicket.


It seems I'm quite adept at finding peculiar things.



Ahhhh.... Just how can I describe my mental state right now?


It's hard to describe my feelings.


I've got a bad feeling about this.


I mean - how can I not, after seeing this thing in the thicket?


That thing I tend to spot every now and then.


That thing - how do I say this - it's lightly clothed and is holding something that looks like a certain tool...


"Ah, uh... um"


Inside my brain, the pieces of this puzzle are coming together - they all point to one thing and one thing only.


That weird bio-paper-balloon I saw at the office.


The dinosaurs.


That strange five-centimeter-sized bird.


That dreadful twenty centimeter thing.


The mammoth.




And what I saw just now...


"Right then, let's just pretend I never saw anything."


"Saw what now?"


"Ah, no, it has nothing to do with you, don't worry about it!"


"?"


I feel bad for saying that to the fairy, who is standing there with its head inclined, but I can see where this whole thing is going now.


It is likely -- no, definitely -- a papercraft model of a proto-human that I see inside the thicket.


I come home to find a truly delicious dinner waiting for me.


French fries and golden fried whitefish in a cabbage salad.


After I fulfill my needs, I confide in Grandfather about what I have seen.


"There's a word for people like you..."


Grandfather supports his forehead in his hand and sighs.


"This mess has gone way beyond just interference in another race's affairs, you know."


"I'm sorry. But I'm glad we could have this conversation. I wouldn't have been able to stand the anxiety if I kept it to myself."


"You should have told me all this before you ate; before, I tell you."


"Yeeesss"


"Honestly. You should have realized it back when you saw the dinosaurs. You should know from what happened last time that they like to recreate things that old humanity also did".


"You are summarily correct, and I have not a single excuse."


"Are you worried about the tools they were carrying?


Yes... They were only rudimentary, but... Those tools... they were most definitely..."


I throw into the conversation the name of a tool I use regularly.


"They were holding whisks."




I show up at the village early in the morning this time.


As I approach the savanna, my unease only grows.


"They're all gone..."


All signs of the papercraft animals are gone now.


It's dead silent, and it feels like I have time-traveled back to when the savanna had first appeared.



Very unnatural.


I head to the village in the hope that I can get to the bottom of it all.


"It's still there... thank goodness."


The village stands -- as it always has -- before me.


The fairies are still there too.


"Harro!" "Ms. Human!" "G'day, eh?" "Are you jobless today too?"


"Hello, hello!"


Mr. Cap is here too.


"Good morning, Mr. Cap."


"... You talkin' to me?"


This fairy, who has an origami helmet on, inclines his head, and his entire body as well.


"I'm not Mr. Cap though?"


"Huh? But..."


But he looks exactly... Or not; they all look the same to me.


But this guy's probably the only one here who's wearing such an eccentric hat.


"Oh my... You had such a tan before, so why is your skin so strangely pale now?"


"It's a reflection of my innocence."


Does he think I'm complementing him? He's beaming.


"Is it even possible to reverse a tan like this? Then again, I'm talking about you guys."


"We're most definitely ourselves!"


"I see."


"By the way, I'm Helmet now."


"You've changed your name?"


"Life is full of nuance, see."


"That's a rather aggressive life you're living."


"It's aggressively aggressive!"


"Fighting poses are all well and good, but you can't hunt anymore, do you realize that? There are no animals around."


"Huh?" It doesn't seem like he understands. "Why?!"


"It seems like they've gone extinct."


"It's gonna be troublesome if they're extinct!"


"Are you sure you haven't just hunted them to extinction?"


"But we didn't do it all that much..."


"I don't think so; I'm sure you've been hunting them behind my back. You just don't remember it."



"Oho?"


I get a carefree response, as usual.


"I knew it; you can't hunt in the sixth period now."


"What's the sixth period?"


"Neanderthals and other ape people, it would probably be called something like the 'Primate series' wouldn't it?"

I explain what I have seen in the thicket to them.

"They are ten centimeters tall, and what's more, they look like people, you know."


It's all paper, though.


"And the fact that they have tools means they're quite intelligent, so... Even if they're papercraft, they're going to be tough to beat."


"I don't get what the problem is," says a fairy.


"Oho."


"We've got lots of waffles left. And a ton of other snacks too. So we don't need to hunt right now."


They're living entirely in the present.


"So anyway... We're singing today too. Join us, Ms. Human!"


"Sweets!" "Songs!" "Laaa, laaa laaaaaaa!"


The fairies are carrying large amounts of candy.


Mixed in are varieties of sweets I've never even seen before.


My interest is piqued.


"... If you insist."


The time passes sweetly.


I should make sure to bring a tea set next time. Having tea with sweets is ingrained into my very genes, and not teaching the fairies about this beautiful culture is something I can't abide by.


"By the way, they call this kind of thing the gluttony period."


"Oho~"


Incorrigible as always, these fairies.


If you guys aren't careful, some other race may rise up and overthrow you."


"For real?"


TAAATATARAAAAAA


A new race on the rise begins its assault.


Somebody cries out: "Eeek! Enemies?!"





The villagers fall into a panic. They're running around like headless chickens.


Teamwork is out of the window.


They haven't a single measure in place, and the invaders encounter no resistance as a result.


Instantly, the village is on the brink of pandemonium.


"AAAuughh!" "EEEeeeeeeeek!" "Waaaaaaaaahh!" "Enemieeeees!" "They're heeeeere!" "Escaaaaape!"


The attackers are the papercraft primitive people.


No, I hesitate to call them that; they're a battle-hardened military force.


Not of flesh and blood. But they are armed.


With spears of paper and bamboo strips, paper helmets and paper armor.


A civilization of the paper-age, not stone.


"Also... Are those... Horses?"


They've domesticated papercraft horses and taken them as their steeds.


Horseback riding changes the battle to an unimaginable extent.


The weaponry differs too.


At a glance, the fairies have nothing but simple spears.


This is because their style doesn't require technology more advanced than that.


As for the paper primitive people, they're covered from head to toe in advanced armor.


And that armor isn't made of simple paper either.


That's right. They're using cardboard.


Cardboard - the strongest kind of paper.


It's physically strong and can be used to wrap any manner of heavy-weight item.


Our legends tell us of its widespread use by old humanity at its peak, for example, as bedding, or even housing.


It's hard to see how one could live inside cardboard, though.


"Flimsy paper can't possibly compare to the might of cardboard," I proclaim.


"Hoho!"


"You're pretty relaxed, aren't you, even at a time like this."


"Coz it ain't my problem?"


What a rebel.


"But, maybe one day, you'll be in trouble too."


A belated defense line has now taken shape in the village square.


But the fairies, who don't know how to fight and have inferior weapons are just kicked about by the cavalry.


"AAAaaaaah!" "Too strong!" "Too hard!" "Good golly!" "We're no match!" "Run for it!" "EEEeek!" "Nein!"


And so, the fairies are dispersed. Ah- ah- ah- ah...


The horsemen are approaching me as well.


"Look, they're here."


"They're what?!"


"You'd better escape, or you'll get bullied too!"


"I s'pose I will? Will I see you again, Ms. Human?"


"Maybe at the next festival."


"I seee!"


If you were to knock the anger (怒) and grief (哀) out of the Japanese word for all emotions, 「喜怒哀楽」 (composed of kanji for joy, anger, grief and humor), the rest would describe the look on his face as he attempts to give himself whiplash.


"See you later then."


And with that, he's gone like the wind.


It seems the raiders aren't interested in humans, so they pass me by and run around, laying waste to the village.


Seeing one of them using a mammoth tusk as a spear, I realize it.


The fairies weren't the only ones doing the hunting.


There were likely many other large creatures in parts of the savanna I hadn't seen, weren't there?


All the animals probably went extinct due to the high hunting pressure exerted by the two races.


As a result, the two hunting tribes were the only ones left on the savanna.


Conflict was inevitable.


And now, the fairies have been eliminated in the final round.


The fairies are being driven over the fence and out into the savanna, one at a time.


Their tents have been razed, their deity desecrated, and even the few sweets they had saved up have been stolen, piled up in the center of the village square, and fenced off.


This is what the end of a civilization looks like.


"How heartless!"


The end of an era.


I give a small, heartfelt wave to my tiny friends who are escaping.


"Stay well, everyone!"




"Oi, granddaughter."


"Ugh" - Even as a refined maiden, I tend to unintentionally groan when I am interrupted while writing things.


"... What is it?"


"Why the long face?"


It's because my displeasure tends to show.


I would rather my mood be referred to as "an elegant melancholy" instead.


"Please get off my back. What is it?"


"Guess what - there's a rumor going around town about some strange sightings in the ruins.


"What do you mean by strange sightings?"


Grandfather looks at me with suspicion.


"Elephants and tigers made of paper roaming around, that's what."


[......]


Grandfather and I stare each other down.


"Did you go see what they were up to today?"


"No, I was busy writing... Also, it's strange. The fairies were dispersed. There shouldn't be anyone left to make more papercraft."


"I know that already, but were they really all scattered? Based on what you told me, the mammal series shouldn't even have been released."


"They really did disperse, I tell you! Right before my eyes. They were caught on the wrong ends of the paper peoples' spears."


"Hrm, so it's unconfirmed, but these new fauna are apparently still being manufactured."


"I also believe so. I mean, I never saw where the fairies were making the papercraft after all."


"It's obvious; the fairies are making them."


"That primitive paper person from the other day was holding a crude whisk, you know."


"Hmmm"

tt


"And the same kind showed up again yesterday, as nomads on horseback. Perfectly natural, no?"


"Right, right. If you get to the point where you've got domestic animals tilling the land, the maximum number of people you can support just explodes.


"Because they'd have lots of food, isn't it?"


"This kind of production capacity leaves hunter-gatherers in the dust. Consequently, such an agrarian society can even support professions on the level of kings or priests. And that allows them a militaristic disposition to rival that of hunter-gatherers, who are used to only hunting. Agrarian civilizations tend to be comparatively more fiendish and barbaric. Also, agriculture brings about new developments in tools, like birthing the use of iron or bronze. Once horses are trained enough to be ridden into battle, such a civilization will bear its fangs toward others. It's a series of events that's repeated itself surprisingly often. Perhaps it was always inevitable. As for the hunter-gatherers, their impartial civil structure prevents individuals from assuming absolute control over everything. Because it's hard to preserve food, and wealth cannot be concentrated as a result. In terms of this example-"


"Yeahhhh, totally, very true, very very true~"


Grandfather's age sometimes shows, and I need to force him back on track when that happens.


"Uhhgh"


Grandfather, whose spiel got cut off abruptly, looks at me with a groan. Ahh, is it him I take after?


... So, what's the part that's got your gears turning?"


"Don't the paper people eat candy?"


The papersaurs ingested sweets due to the whims of the fairies.


Every single model of these series is like that.


Then, it follows that the primates behave the same way as well.


Looks like Grandfather is beginning to catch on. I state my conclusion.


"The fairies can't make sweets. Neither can the dinosaurs. But what if the paper people could make them?"


Grandfather is immediately hit with the realization.


"Whisks... So that's why!"


"Isn't this exactly like an agrarian society?"


"Mhmmmm, hmmm..."


These paper people, who have filled their stomachs through farming, are free to pursue their own interests, resulting in specialisations such as the military.


I bet they found those paper whisks hard to use.


So soon, they created water-resistant paper, and then their technology improved to the point of using cardboard.


"Uh huh, this is a prime example of cause and effect."


"Looks like the faeries' skill at papercraft was their undoing. Perhaps they were in over their heads with it all."


"That's fine, perhaps. Fairies are different from us humans, after all."


Grandfather looks meditative as he rests his hip on the windowsill.


I join him and look up at the refreshingly blue sky.


"The papercraft rabble will clear right up once the fairies are gone, I think."



"True."


I can see the entire village from this third-floor office.


"...Hmm? Someone's coming over."


"A guest?"


A tall figure is ambling up the road to the building.


Their gait is somewhat clumsy.


They spot us looking from the third floor and give us a wave.


"Uhm, pardon me. I'm looking for the local UNMC office?" They yell.


"You're looking right at it!" Grandfather yells back.


Right, I'll let him handle it then.


I rush back to my desk with my head down.


Grandfather exchanges a few words with the traveler and then turns around - "Hey, this has something to do with you. They'll be here soon."


"Huh? Me?"


"Got any idea why?"


I shake my head from side to side with gusto. There's barely anyone I know in the village even.


Soon, there's a knock at the office door.


"I don't know what's going on, but go entertain them."


"Awa-wa-wa-a-a-a"


My mind turns blank at Grandfather's unreasonable demand. I wave my arms wildly in an appeal to my helplessness, but nothing changes.


I suppose I should go greet our guest at the door.


My hand shakes as I open the door.


"Yuh-yes, this is the Mediation Council..."


I recoil as the door opens.


They are wearing a mask under their sombrero.


A crude drawing of a face. It's got a somewhat ethnic look to it.


And they're wearing a poncho that comes down to their ankles.


"Wuh-wh-what in the?!"


"Ah, my clothing? My apologies. It is a part of our identity. Just think of it as my out-doors outfit," says a muffled voice from under the mask.


"O-okay..."



I don't know how to respond to this.


"Hoho, could this be some form of South American protective charm?"


Grandfather accosts the person, full of curiosity.


"Yes, when I made the mask, I also incorporated bits from South America's ancient civilizations."


"Hrrrmmm, looks like it's inspired by things discovered from the hanging gardens."


"You're quite well-read; nobody would think your species is on the path to retirement."


"Oh, it's just a hobby of mine." Grandfather beckons our guest inside. "Sorry about the mess."


"No, no. Then, pardon my intrusion."


"Oi, can you do something about the lamps?"


"Ah, yes!"


Ahh, that dark, confined space I was aiming to turn into 'my nook' will be used for its original purpose now...


Grandfather and I sit side-by-side, facing the masked person.


"So, which village are you from?"


Ah, I'm from the foot of that hill nearby. I'd come over just recently."


"That's quite close... It's about a few hours to go one way, isn't it?"


"Perhaps I will greet the others of your village later."


"We're all quite laid-back. Come visit any time."


"I'm grateful. I hope I can get along with everyone.


"Oi, make yourself useful and serve up some tea."


Grandfather gives me an order, but the masked person raises their hand to stop me.


Ah, no, thank you. Our kind doesn't really subscribe to that custom. Only certain very specific foods and drinks can be offered to visitors in our culture."


"Quite a unique culture... Are you from an ethnic minority?"


"Well, it's something like that. The gist is that I am restricted in what I can eat."


"Hohoh, I'd love to ask you about the details later. I'm rather fond of such things."


"Oh, certainly."


"Umm, did... did you have some business with me?" I ask in a barely audible whisper.


The mask responds. Such a strange person. They exude an uncanny pressure.


"Yes, I heard you are a renowned pâtissier?"


"Wh- Wahhhhh?!"


I'm a pâtissier?!


"We're particularly fond of sweet things, so... I came to ask if there was any way for you to make some for us..."


"I-I'm n-not so great to be called a pati- not at all!"


I bow lightly with my hands between my thighs.


"Such qualifications don't really exist nowadays. But still, my granddaughter isn't half-bad at making sweets and the like."


Even so, such rumors have reached our village. Rumors that you can make the most delicious of sweets."


"No... I'm... not..."


I hang my head even further down.


I want to just curl up in bed...


We can provide you with whatever ingredients you wish, so if you could make something with them... and also if we could establish a commercial relationship... We would be much obliged."


"Oi, didn't you bring some sweets with you today? You made some this morning, didn't you?" Grandfather says as he remembers.


"... There's a bit of fruit cake..."


"Wonderful things like fruit cakes... Such perishables are hard to come by..."


"Can you share some with our guest?"



"Ah... then, I'll do that!"


I trot to my basket, bring it back, take out three wrapped slices of cake, and thrust them forward, still in their wrapping paper.


A seasonal fruit tart.


I made this pound cake with wild strawberries at the center and various freeze-dried nuts and berries on the side.


The cream has a hint of banana in it. Because the dry fruits don't have much in the freshness department, I made liberal use of the wild strawberries.



"A portable shrine! You have a portable shrine!"


"A what now?!"


"It's not such a special thing... you don't need to go so far...."


"I'm so moved. Ahh, what a wonderful luster! Yes, I can't wait any longer. I shall partake at once."


They slide their mask a little to the side, tear a bit of the cake off with their fingers and push the piece into their mouth.


"Oh... Ohhhhhhhh! Delicious, utterly delicious!"


"... Thank you."


I don't eat such sweets often, but does your tribe like such sweet things a lot?" asks Grandfather.


"But of course! One could say it is our very lifeblood. Ahh, a little more... Just a little more..."


The masked person demolishes two of the cakes in an instant.


"Ah, I would love to eat one more... But I need to let the others have a taste as well."


"Please consume it quickly... It is a very perishable item, after all."


Though the cakes are wrapped in non-breathable paper for preservation, they still don't last for more than a few days.


"That's right, isn't it. I have many more questions for you, but... I must take this home quickly. Also, if you could... Please consider that matter we talked about earlier."


"... Huh?"


Grandfather elbows me.


"They're talking about trading with you."


"Trade..."


Indeed. We possess unique technology. In particular, we have restored the technology required to obtain specific materials that are difficult to find nowadays."


"Materials to make sweets with?"


"Indeed, exactly."


The village this person hails from is rather strange.


Most other villages have their hands full sustaining themselves, so luxury items are not much of a focus.



"... If you have many ingredients... It would help me a lot. Uhm, about that... I agree."


"So you will partner with us?"


"Yes."


"Splendid..." The masked person stands up with vigor, and trembles. They seem to be shivering with joy.


"I must return to my village and inform the others post-haste!"


"Ah, so you're returning?"


"Yes! I'm loath to leave, but I cannot impose on you any further today. I must return before this treasure hardens."


They are holding the cake as if it were something precious.


"Please, spend a while the next time."


"Then, people of the Mediation Council! Until next time."


The masked person leaves the office in a flurry.


"Hahhhhh..."


The pressure lightens on me. I breathe a sigh of relief.


"You're still not over your shyness, eh?"


"That aside... Grandfather, did you notice it? Back when they lifted their mask..."


"... Hm, ahh, that?"


We glance at each other and open our mouths at the same time.


"Looked papery." "Their lips were papery."


I want to think that can't be right.


I want to think so, but I also know it is the undeniable truth.


I had been under the impression that the papersauruses and the paper animals were all made as successive series.


Anyone would think that.


But there was one thing I had forgotten.


They were all extremely complex paper organisms.


They could remain active for ridiculously long periods, with incredible finesse, driven only by the unbelievably simple power of stretched rubber bands.


Consequently, it is not out of the realm of possibility that new mechanisms of greater sophistication would also exist.


For example, ones with the ability to reproduce, or the mechanism of evolution.



"Come to think of it... That trash you spotted back then, Grandfather."




"No, stop, don't even think about it."


Are you okay with leaving this be?"


"All they want to do is trade in peace, isn't it fine? And you, you can make as many confectionaries as you wish now," says Grandfather.


"I suppose... but... perhaps... those paper animals witnessed in the ruins..."


"What will be, will be. Give it up," Grandfather utters expressionlessly.


"Ahahahhahahaha..."


I sink back down on the sofa.


From the door the masked person had left open when they exited, a strange papery butterfly gracefully flits by.



Author's Notes

  1. mimeograph: The photocopier's predecessor. It used a sort of screen printing mechanism. Watashi is using a stylus to prepare illustration stencils for her report. See: [[1]]
  2. Zouri slippers: See - [[2]]
  3. Yellow No. 1 is a color used by Japanese National Railways (JNR) to paint their engines. Hex code is #FDBC00.
  4. In Japanese, Watashi uses the word for "atom". The word for atom is "原子", pronounced "geshi". The word for primitive or primordial is "原始", which is also pronounced as "genshi" Mr. Fishroll uses the word for primitive.
  5. The term used is "ごぼ天" which is a kind of udon. See: [[3]]
  6. Probably Thomas Hobbes, an English political philosopher. See: [[4]]
  7. Papercraft: A type of model created by folding a 2D net so it becomes 3D. See: [[5]]
  8. A small dinosaur, sort of the velociraptor's cousin. They are pack hunters like the raptors. See: [[6]]
  9. Parasol Chocolate - It looks like a rolled-up umbrella, but made of chocolate. See: [7]
  10. Castella: A Japanese wagashi that is like a tea-cake [[8]]
  11. Monaka: A Japanese traditional cream biscuit, see: [[9]]
  12. Fugashi: long pieces of wheat dough that are baked and covered in brown sugar. See: [10]
  13. This is a nice Japanese pun. 狩り (kari) means hunting. 住ませる (sumaseru) means "to inhabit (some place)". This fairy has put the first two syllables of each of these words together to get: かりすま (karisuma or, charisma). Feel free to get mad at me for ruining, then explaining the joke.
  14. Cretaceous Period - The third age of the dinosaurs is the cretaceous period, and it has all the cool ones in it. See: [[11]]
  15. karintou - A Japanese sweet fried snack.
  16. 貯古齢糖 - Pronounced "Shogoreito", this is what they used to call chocolate back when it was first introduced in japan. See: [12] (use google translate, the article is in Japanese.)
  17. This is a reference to bousouzoku culture, where slogans (even innocuous ones) are written using kanji that have very different (and often violent) meanings, but produce the same sounds as the intended characters of the slogan. Incidentally, 「貯古齢糖」 is composed of kanji with the meanings of "stored", "old", "age" and "sugar".
  18. 血汚冷屠 - this time, the kanji used mean "blood", "defilement/pollution/rape", "cold" and "slaughter". Ayyup.
  19. transliterated without omission or embellishment from japanese
  20. Original japanese was, transliterated to romanji: "shou-mi" (show me)
  21. The generic name for cretaceous winged dinosaurs.
  22. hisho is secretary, soujisho is mass resignation. hi becomes ji when conjugated.


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