Difference between revisions of "User talk:71.202.158.239"

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Right now I'm working on the Fuuko Master SEENs. There's a lot of problems with using more than one tense in a single sentence that I want to fix, but since I don't know any Japanese I have no idea what the correct tense is supposed to be. Therefore, I ask a translator to either fix SEEN1005, where I've marked lines that need fixing with *s, or to post the fixes to the lines here. Once someone's done that, I'll spread the changes to the other Fuuko Master SEENs (there's a lot of repetition between them).
 
Right now I'm working on the Fuuko Master SEENs. There's a lot of problems with using more than one tense in a single sentence that I want to fix, but since I don't know any Japanese I have no idea what the correct tense is supposed to be. Therefore, I ask a translator to either fix SEEN1005, where I've marked lines that need fixing with *s, or to post the fixes to the lines here. Once someone's done that, I'll spread the changes to the other Fuuko Master SEENs (there's a lot of repetition between them).
   
SEEN1005 problems:
+
SEEN1005 problems: fixed!
<pre>
 
<0002> She stops and turns around as I called her.*
 
//"Stops" and "turns" are present tense, "called" is past.
 
// 俺の呼びかけに足を止めて、振り返る。
 
   
  +
*Thanks for specifying this. The reason why it probably wasn't adjusted is that there's no clear format whether to use present or past tense when the narrator describes what just happened. The ambiguity stems from the fact that a quote just stated was previous, but it is current nonetheless. Like "Hey..." is what I was going to (or about) to say. Or "Hey..." is what I said. That's somewhat past tense but it's current, and since there's also actions that are concurrent (er I threw that word in there randomly) when mentioning the narration, that would be present tense. Right now it's not set in stone but what you say makes sense. I'd implement some now if I weren't doing homeworks. -Amoirsp
<0029> I stick the note on her forehead with a scotch tape.*
 
// Needs to be either "with a piece of scotch tape" or just "with scotch tape"
 
// その額にぺたりとセロハンテープで貼り紙を貼る。
 
   
  +
Okay, new question. Do we want to make the dialogue that's the same across several SEENs (that is, the parts of Fuuko Master that are literally repeated word-for-word each time) have the same translation each time as well?
<0050> I jump back as she returns to reality, and distanced myself, pretending I didn't know anything.*
 
// "jump" and "returns" are present tense, while "distanced" and "didn't" are past tense.
 
// 風子が我に返る。俺は飛び退き、距離を置いて、平静を装う。
 
 
<0073> We turn a corner, then I shut her inside a narrow path and went back to the corridor alone.*
 
// "turn" is present tense and "went" is past tense. "shut" can be either.
 
// 角を曲がって、狭い通路の先に夢想状態の風子を押し込めると、俺はひとり廊下に舞い戻る。
 
 
<0079> \{Fuuko} "There are lots of urinals lined up that were unfamiliar!"*
 
// "are" is present tense, "were" is past tense.
 
// \{風子}「見慣れない形の便器がたくさん並んでましたっ!」
 
 
<0099> \{Fuuko} "It feels really good, but then Fuuko noticed that there's a man with a beard right beside, and he gave a smile!"*
 
// "feels" is present tense, but "noticed" and "gave" are past tense (I'm not sure if there's can stand for "there was" as well as "there is").
 
// "gave a smile" also sounds awkward in English, so consider doing something there too.
 
// \{風子}「とても、気持ちよかったんですが、隣に髭を生やした大人の人がいて、風子を見ながら微笑んでいました!」
 
 
<0160> She realize that the one standing in front of her is not me.*
 
// "realize" should be either "realizes"(present tense) or "realized"(past tense).
 
// 正面に立つのが俺でなくなっていることに気づく。
 
 
<0190> I wave at the male student, and gave him a sign that it's alright now.*
 
// "wave" and "it's" are present tense, "gave" is past tense.
 
// 俺は男子生徒にもういいと手で合図した。
 
 
<0191> We exchanges places as Fuuko looks down and placed her head in her hands.*
 
// "looks" is present tense, "placed" is past tense.
 
// "exchanges" should be either "exchange" (present tense) or "exchanged" (past tense).
 
// 風子が頭を抱えて顔を伏せてる間に、入れ代わる。
 
 
</pre>More to come-
 
 
*Thanks for specifying this. The reason why it probably wasn't adjusted is that there's no clear format whether to use present or past tense when the narrator describes what just happened. The ambiguity stems from the fact that a quote just stated was previous, but it is current nonetheless. Like "Hey..." is what I was going to (or about) to say. Or "Hey..." is what I said. That's somewhat past tense but it's current, and since there's also actions that are concurrent (er I threw that word in there randomly) when mentioning the narration, that would be present tense. Right now it's not set in stone but what you say makes sense. I'd implement some now if I weren't doing homeworks. -Amoirsp
 

Revision as of 04:49, 25 November 2007

It looks like you've made some good edits. Keep it up, anonymous editor! --Richard 23 21:34, 23 November 2007 (PST)

Right now I'm working on the Fuuko Master SEENs. There's a lot of problems with using more than one tense in a single sentence that I want to fix, but since I don't know any Japanese I have no idea what the correct tense is supposed to be. Therefore, I ask a translator to either fix SEEN1005, where I've marked lines that need fixing with *s, or to post the fixes to the lines here. Once someone's done that, I'll spread the changes to the other Fuuko Master SEENs (there's a lot of repetition between them).

SEEN1005 problems: fixed!

  • Thanks for specifying this. The reason why it probably wasn't adjusted is that there's no clear format whether to use present or past tense when the narrator describes what just happened. The ambiguity stems from the fact that a quote just stated was previous, but it is current nonetheless. Like "Hey..." is what I was going to (or about) to say. Or "Hey..." is what I said. That's somewhat past tense but it's current, and since there's also actions that are concurrent (er I threw that word in there randomly) when mentioning the narration, that would be present tense. Right now it's not set in stone but what you say makes sense. I'd implement some now if I weren't doing homeworks. -Amoirsp

Okay, new question. Do we want to make the dialogue that's the same across several SEENs (that is, the parts of Fuuko Master that are literally repeated word-for-word each time) have the same translation each time as well?