Tokyo Ravens

[iron maw]

In defense of Scribblicious, his quote came from the anime. So it's more like the anime worded it badly, given amount of minors errors in funi's scripts this is all, but surprising.

[FrozenCitrus]

I also agree that many changes he made are quite good, it's just that there are also many parts which was paraphrased and end up changing its meaning or losing some aspects of the original word/phrase.

For example,

Original:
The chill of congealing blood

Changed to:
The chill of coagulating blood

Although "congealing" and "coagulating" are synonymous and mean solidification of liquid, however "congealing" are usually solidification cause by cooling. So the new sentence actually lose the image of warm blood cooling down.

A more serious one would be

Original:
Touji was also extremely confused, but he forcefully suppressed his wavering heart and confirmed the situation to start off.

Changed to:
Touji was also extremely confused, but he forcefully suppressed his wavering heart and began studying the area.

"Confirming the situation" and "studying the area" are actually completely different things.
Confirming means to make sure of something already known, whereas, studying give more sense of learning about something in the present.

This is especially true when combined into the above phrases, as "confirming the situation" would be like reviewing their known situation/circumstances, but "studying the area" would mean looking around to check their surroundings.

Also,

Original:
After Touji confirmed that fact, he decided to stop his consideration there and turned his gaze away from Harutora

Changed to:
After Touji confirmed that fact, he decided to stop his analysis there and turned his gaze away from Harutora.

Again, "consideration" and "analysis" are different from each other.
Consideration is the act of considering - to think deeply while taking everything into account.
Analysis is proof by deduction.
This means "consideration" could include much broader types of thinking methods, not just limited to analysis(i.e. it can include summarisation, hypothesize and etc.).

There are actually quite a few more I found, but since the post is already very long, I will just stop them here.

I just want to point out that since the number of changes in that revision is quite big, there are bound to be both valid and invalid ones. So maybe it might be nice if someone would review them.

[lygophile]

It's true that he makes a lot of rather substantial changes. I was a bit surprised myself when I first saw some of the changelogs.

But I personally think readability is a bit more important than extreme translation precision. Since my translations are from JP -> Chinese -> English, I think extreme precision is probably impossible to get. I do think that he usually does a lot for readability, though he occasionally introduces minor grammar errors and sometimes changes the meaning a bit too far from what was intended. I try to look over the edits and revert changes that were too drastic.

I would say that the last two changes you mentioned in your previous post are fine. I don't think the difference between 'consideration' and 'analysis' would be able to survive two translations.

[FrozenCitrus]

I also agree that readability is the most important issue, it's just that some of them seems like they're already good as they are or maybe even better. So I just try to point those out. If it seems offensive, then I would like to apologize for that.

[iron maw]

Until now, Harutora had only had the impression that Yakou was an extraordinary practitioner. For example, a genius superior to 'strong Onmyouji' like Kagami Reiji, Ohtomo, or Kagami. He had believed him to be a legendary Onmyouji who controlled powerful magics and shikigami.

Eh, there seems to be some mistake here. Harutora isn't suppose to be saying Kagami twice right?

EDIT: I think you probably meant to write Kogure after Ohtomo.

[lygophile]

Indeed, it's Kogure.

[iron maw]

I see.

Thanks for the chapter as always.

[vaker076]

thanks some much for the chapter

PD.
what happened with the red link???

[Ulrick]

Someone erased them.

[vaker076]

thank you for the chapter, the anime was good, but the LN is muuuuuuuch better, waiting for the next chapter

[iron maw]

Lygo, now that we are about to hit Vol 10 can you/are you going to add Akino's character to the other MCs profiles? She pretty much a primary character.

[lygophile]

I don't even know who Akino is yet. I'm translating as I read through the volumes. Also, I didn't make the MC profile thing - but I'll add her eventually unless someone beats me to it, I guess.

[iron maw]

Okay cool.

[tornberry]

Thank you alot with the fast translations Tokyo Ravens recently! As expected, the anime skipped alot of things which is quite sad

[Curry boyy]

Any status update on volume 6's unfinished chapter 1? It would be nice to have the volume completed.