First of all, sorry for slacking off so much. I have school right now so it's sort of hard to edit.
Second of all, if you look at the format guidelines (available here) it says:
Occasionally, major edits may be called for to correct incorrect or awkward grammar. Editors are required to open discussion for any major edits on the associated Talk page and allow sufficient time for other editors and translators to review the proposed edit.
"Major edits" include anything that clearly changes the meaning of the text, such as changing nouns, pronouns or verbs, deleting, adding or moving whole sentences, or any edits that effect an entire paragraph.
Just taking a quick look at your edit, it seems that you moved/deleted lots of whole paragraphs/sentences.
I'm sorry to say so, but your edit probably fall under that category, and I might have to revert them. I'll tell you for sure after I look at the edit carefully.
Edit: I'm probably gonna have to revert the edit. It looks like you combined whole paragraphs.
I also took a quick look to check, I agree with Jumpy.
It's true that even after editing even the Haruhi novels don't read as well as an original English novel, but I think that's the guideline BT works with in order to maintain the original Japanese work.
We appreciate your help.
Maybe some of the other editors might want to comment how to do this, since I have no idea. The notion of editing without knowing the original language is out my range of abilities.
For what it's worth, I do have three years of college Japanese experience, and I can understand quite a bit of the stuff I read (dictionary lookups for kanji takes the most time, naturally). So if I had the original Japanese novels on hand, I might be able to translate, though probably not well.
Editing the translations without knowing the original isn't hard though; it's just a matter of applying grammatical transformations to the translated text to smooth out sentence and paragraph structure, and remove redundancy. Something I have practice in, at least.
I can PM the Japanese raws if you are interested, let us know what you think on translating we do welcome more translators for the project. Translating work is fairly simple here on B-T, do as you much as you can whenever you can, no pressure/no schedule.
College language classes is sufficient at least that's what I think for translating light novels such as KnS. If you need help check the forum or the channel, and I think there is a website for kanji lookup.
I fixed the punctuation, spelling errors, and capitalization for the chapters already up. I swapped a few commas for "ands" and a few things like that to make it flow better.
After reading this:
"Facing the embarrassed door guard’s cry, Kazuma distantly looked with condescension."
I think it might flow better if it was changed to:
"Facing the embarrassed door guard’s cry, Kazuma looked down (maybe "upon him?") with condescension."
Zero wrote:I fixed the punctuation, spelling errors, and capitalization for the chapters already up. I swapped a few commas for "ands" and a few things like that to make it flow better.
After reading this:
"Facing the embarrassed door guard’s cry, Kazuma distantly looked with condescension."
I think it might flow better if it was changed to:
"Facing the embarrassed door guard’s cry, Kazuma looked down (maybe "upon him?") with condescension."
Thoughts?
looks good to me, and i like it with the "upon him"
it gives it more flavour.
"Please note, we have added a consequence for failure.Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an unsatisfactory mark on your official test record, followed by death. Good luck."
All done. I think it gives Kazuma a more superior air about him this way.
Next one:
"The one in the doorway was the person who had the ability to vanquish the dark with spiritual powers not beneath the powers for light, suzerain in waiting and owner of Enraiha, is Juugo’s daughter, Kannagi Ayano."
This could be changed to "heir of the suzerain", "future inheritor of the title of suzerain", something along those lines.
Zero wrote:
This could be changed to "heir of the suzerain", "future inheritor of the title of suzerain", something along those lines.
Thoughts?
I like "heir of the Suzerain", definitely makes it much more clearer.
"Please note, we have added a consequence for failure.Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an unsatisfactory mark on your official test record, followed by death. Good luck."
"Yuuki Shingo and Oogami Takeya were the strongest practitioners of the branch families. Even though they have opposing personalities, they are great friends. This combination excluding the main family can be said to be without compare."
[Without compare] could be changed to something along the lines of "unequaled".
"The flames that appear at the same time as the yell, even though connected to Shingo’s body, the clothes were not burnt. Shingo had surprisingly unthought-of carefulness."
Assuming I'm reading this right, the last part could be changed to something like "a surprising level of unexpected carefulness" or "was exhibiting an (surprisingly?) unexpected level of carefulness"
“That kind of idea would only come from someone with "little conscience."
I'm not quite sure, is Genma thinking this or is Yorimichi saying it?
Zero wrote:"Yuuki Shingo and Oogami Takeya were the strongest practitioners of the branch families. Even though they have opposing personalities, they are great friends. This combination excluding the main family can be said to be without compare."
[Without compare] could be changed to something along the lines of "unequaled".
"The flames that appear at the same time as the yell, even though connected to Shingo’s body, the clothes were not burnt. Shingo had surprisingly unthought-of carefulness."
Assuming I'm reading this right, the last part could be changed to something like "a surprising level of unexpected carefulness" or "was exhibiting an (surprisingly?) unexpected level of carefulness"
“That kind of idea would only come from someone with "little conscience."
I'm not quite sure, is Genma thinking this or is Yorimichi saying it?
Thoughts?
"was exhibiting an unexpected level of carefulness"
To the point and shorten the sentence.
Like that edit.
As`for the last part, not so sure, haven't read the script lately, so can't really have an opinion on that, at this moment.
"Please note, we have added a consequence for failure.Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an unsatisfactory mark on your official test record, followed by death. Good luck."
erehwon wrote:sorry out of town and busy, so no translation done recently, but I'll get to it... keep up the editing.
no problems, after all everyone is rushing for the Xmas shopping, or to get things wrapped up before the holidays....
Oh well students should be getting to the holidays soon, so we should have some activities, unless they all got part-time xmas jobs.....
"Please note, we have added a consequence for failure.Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an unsatisfactory mark on your official test record, followed by death. Good luck."
I think it gives Kazuma a more superior air about him this way.