Hataraku Maou-sama!

[seitsuki]

'Piercing' refers to the 'phrase', which is the subject of the sentence. Unrelated to 'everyone'. Pretty sure the structure makes that perfectly clear.

[Spyro]

Someone's already translating volume 8?

[pudding321]

'Piercing' refers to the 'phrase', which is the subject of the sentence. Unrelated to 'everyone'. Pretty sure the structure makes that perfectly clear.

What is 'phrase' anyway?

And no, 'everyone' is preceded by a comma. Besides, the 'phrase' is not the subject since it is preceded by the preposition 'at'.

[seitsuki]

......shush. My grammar is absolutely flawless.

[larethian]

Seitsuki inferred it by context, not by English grammar rules which were obviously not followed, and I agree with him. The 'phrase' is actually referring to Emi's line. Emi's sudden utterance was what 'disturbed' the peace and 'stunned' everyone. The translator probably wanted to use 'piercing'. The sentence needs fixing. And the words 'piercing' and 'bombshell' make a poor simile pair.

[larethian]

Ok, I found the text.

Transcribed:
平和な家庭の夕食時に似つかわしくない、平和の皮を被った爆弾のような発言に、誰もがその場で固まった。

Literally the sentence was:
Unfitting at the time of a peaceful family dinner, at that utterance which was like a bomb covered with the skin of peace, everyone hardened at that place.

My preliminary version:
In a manner that was unfitting during a peaceful family dinner, everyone stiffened on hearing that announcement, which was like 'a wolf jumping out of its sheep's clothing'. (I liberalized a little at the end to make it flow better and make sense in English)

EDIT: missed out 'その場 (at that place)'. I guess 'froze on the spot' could work in place of 'stiffened'.

[pudding321]

Seitsuki inferred it by context, not by English grammar rules which were obviously not followed, and I agree with him. The 'phrase' is actually referring to Emi's line. Emi's sudden utterance was what 'disturbed' the peace and 'stunned' everyone. The translator probably wanted to use 'piercing'. The sentence needs fixing. And the words 'piercing' and 'bombshell' make a poor simile pair.

I hope I didn't sound too scruffy

Well, what do you agree with him? The sentence sounds correct in context or in grammar? I was referring to grammar there, and obviously, any reader will understand a translation in its English sense; otherwise, it defeats the purpose of a translation, doesn't it?

Hmm...What you said, though, is correct: the first thing the translator would like to do is to use wordings suitable in English.

[pudding321]

Ok, I found the text.

Transcribed:
平和な家庭の夕食時に似つかわしくない、平和の皮を被った爆弾のような発言に、誰もがその場で固まった。

Literally the sentence was:
Unfitting at the time of a peaceful family dinner, at that utterance which was like a bomb covered with the skin of peace, everyone hardened.

My preliminary version:
In a manner that was unfitting during a peaceful family dinner, everyone stiffened on hearing that announcement, which was like 'a wolf jumping out of its sheep's clothing'. (I liberalized a little at the end to make it flow better and make sense in English)

Nice one. Let me refine that.

In a manner incoherent to the peaceful family dinner, everyone stiffened on hearing that announcement, as if 'a wolf jumped out of its sheep's clothing'.

Anyway, I still don't get the meaning with both the literal and liberal translations provided. Sucks for me. Guess I have to read the source to find out after all.

[larethian]

I presume you are reading just what was posted in this thread. The meaning is quite clear if you read the preceding context.

Anyway, I just realized it's translated by Seitsuki (what are you doing? go back to working on Mahouka *whip*)......

[NanoDesu]

"Everyone stiffened at that bombshell, which was phrased deceptively gently but was in fact completely inappropriate for the dinner table in a peaceful home."

That's completely without knowing any context, by the way. So it probably would need some tweaking.

Pudding, you did not use "incoherent" correctly. You might have been thinking of "inconsistent," but even that is rather awkward in this context. Also, the "the peaceful..." needs to be changed to "a peaceful...". But probably the thing you should watch out for the most is that your entire sentence is just a giant dangling modifier.

[pudding321]

"Everyone stiffened at that bombshell, which was phrased deceptively gently but was in fact completely inappropriate for the dinner table in a peaceful home."

That's completely without knowing any context, by the way. So it probably would need some tweaking.

Pudding, you did not use "incoherent" correctly. You might have been thinking of "inconsistent," but even that is rather awkward in this context. Also, the "the peaceful..." needs to be changed to "a peaceful...". But probably the thing you should watch out for the most is that your entire sentence is just a giant dangling modifier.

I only rewrote what I got from larethian's translation, so it's not 'my' entire sentence, you see?
And as I've said, I didn't get it, be it the literal translation or the liberal translation.

Edit: I'm thinking of 'obtrusive' for the replacement of 'incoherent'.

[Spyro]

If this was already covered, sorry. But are we keeping honorifics? How should we address Maou when Alsiel is talking? Order of names?

[pudding321]

If this was already covered, sorry. But are we keeping honorifics? How should we address Maou when Alsiel is talking? Order of names?

http://www.baka-tsuki.org/project/index ... _Guideline

[Spyro]

If this was already covered, sorry. But are we keeping honorifics? How should we address Maou when Alsiel is talking? Order of names?

http://www.baka-tsuki.org/project/index ... _Guideline

I saw that but it doesn't seem like there was a consensus on the order of the names we should stick with since the names were added in by one person (I'm going to assume honorifics are out). It doesn't answer my second question. In case you're confused by what I'm asking, I'm asking whenever Alsiel uses 魔王様, should I translate it as my lord, master, Demon Lord (this is odd), etc or what? And no, this isn't referring when its used in passing in the narration.

[pudding321]

I saw that but it doesn't seem like there was a consensus on the order of the names we should stick with since the names were added in by one person (I'm going to assume honorifics are out). It doesn't answer my second question. In case you're confused by what I'm asking, I'm asking whenever Alsiel uses 魔王様, should I translate it as my lord, master, Demon Lord (this is odd), etc or what? And no, this isn't referring when its used in passing in the narration.

What do the subs groups use for the subs of the anime?