Toriaezu Densetsu no Yūsha no Densetsu:Volume 6 The Forbidden Book

Soiled Legendary Heroes' Legend

The Forbidden Book

Curse.

Curse.

Curse.

It was cursed.

One book found in a dark room.

An ominous air permeated its surroundings.

The world itself seemed to stop, decay and corrupt with the book at its center.

Yes.

The book was obviously cursed.

The curse's strength was immense - just through touch, it will devour and violate humans' souls; destroy the people's will, lives and everything they hold dear.

A curse like that was cast on the book.

No, it might not even be appropriate to call it a curse.

The 'curse' was beyond the level of normal magic and curses.

Even if one gathered all the magic researchers in the Roland Empire, they would not be able to deal with the curse, much less break it.

You don't call something like that a curse.

It's a disaster.

Concepts such as God or religion didn't exist in Roland, but it should still be appropriate to think of it in following terms.

A book written by God...or even a demon.

Read and die.

That much was known.

But he must read it.

"..."

Roland's King - Sion Astal tried to control his hands that are almost shaking from the tension.

Long silver hair and nicely arranged features.

His golden eyes were usually sharp and reflective of his strong will, but now, a tinge of fear - perhaps due to the malicious influence of the curse - was present.

But after waiting for his trembling hands to still, he reached out towards the book again.

He's that kind of king.

No matter how painful or difficult it is, and no matter how much he hurt himself, he'll never stop walking.

He touched the cursed book and looked at its cover.

And saw the following words.

The Legend of the Hero of Truth

"...ha. The Hero of Truth? Have you misspelled 'demon'?"

Sion spat.

Yes.

That was a demon's book.

Read and...

But Sion shook his head and stopped cut of his thoughts. If he began to count the future's worries, he'd immediately lose the courage to proceed.

"Now, demon. What are you trying to show me?"

And like that, he opened the book.

Ignorant of the results that his action would beget.

♦♦♦

The Legend of the Hero of Truth

This story tells of the world's beginning and end, and its next beginning.

Light and darkness.

Good and evil.

The unending history of battles between gods and demons that stretch from the past to the future.

And the story begins in an era when people despaired, when grotesque beings; beings of darkness walked the earth.

Yes, the story begins at the end of the world.

The legend of this hero begins from a village on a country's border.

Two years have passed ever since the central city had fallen under the king of darkness' control.

Darkness overwhelmed the world.

However, people still scattered to the country's borders and managed to survive somehow...

In a village made from the few survivors was a tea shop.

It was a tea shop ran solely by father and daughter, but because their dango was said to be good, they still made some fine cash.

However, the malicious hand of darkness still stretched to such a peaceful village!!

Hundreds of dark beasts suddenly appeared in the village,

"Kuhehehe! So you were hiding here, humans! We'll slaughter all of you!"

They shouted and began their attack.

Ignorant of such a fact, the daughter of the tea shop walked out,

"Ahh geez, we ran out of dango powder. I have to buy some moreaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!!"

She was attacked by the beasts.

The beasts looked at the girl and crowded around her,

"Kehehehe! It's a woman! We have woman's flesh!"

They tore off her garments and even ripped apart her skirt and panty.

"What tender-looking flesh! Let's eat, let's eat~!!"

"Nooooooooooooooooooo!!"

The girl screamed.

Her scream alerted her father, who ran out of the shop. He was shocked at the presence of the beasts.

"B-beasts!?"

And he looked at her naked daughter, who was toyed by the beasts.

"R-Ryneeeeeeeer!!"

"What the!? I'm the naked girl!?"

But the father's scream was for nothing, and Ryner was about to be devoured by the beasts!

"No seriously, stop ignoring me in favor of writing some weird novel..."

What do you mean, weird novel!

"Ah, you finally answered...so you're actually going to reply within the novel. Well, there's something I'd like to know. You know, I sorta want to go for dinner now, but my purse has mysteriously disappeared. I saw you holding something that resembles my purse...what is the meaning of this?"

And the beast opened its mouth, full of sharp fangs....

"Seriously, answer me."

Idiot.

Your line is 'kyaaaaaaaaaah!?'.

"I don't care! Ah fine, I'll just take back my purse..."

S-stop! You fiend! Are you trying to fondle my breasts!?

"Then what should I do!?"

Fufu, help me finish my masterpiece.

"...by masterpiece, you don't mean this poor writing....................................................................................................................................................n-no, I mean, it's such an amazing piece of work! I never realized that you're such a talented writer Ferris really so please let me help you with your masterpiece so please stop strangling me..............."

And the instant that the beast was about to devour Ryner!

"More like, I'm going to die by your hands before the beast gets to m-...oh no, I lied! I-I'll do it! I'll help you!! L-let go of my neck!! Now, please!! W-what should I do, Lady Ferris!? Ah, yes! I'll be the daughter. Kyaaaaaaaaaaaah someone help me."

Fufu, you're quite good at this, aren't you.

"I'll kill..."

Hmm?

"It's nothing, nothing at all. But really, what is this? How long are you going to keep this up?"

Hmm.

At the dawn of this book's publication, I'll be able to live my dream life of luxury and extravagance from its royalties!

"........there you go again.....you really think that's going to happen?"

Of course.

"By the way, what about my dinner?"

As long as I get the royalties, I'll treat you to whatever you'd like.

"......I see. So according to you, even if the book gets published in a million to one chance, and even if it actually sold any copies and you were able to get the royalties...my dinner comes after that....I don't know how many years that's going to take...b-but I have to do my best to stay alive..."

However, the girl's hope was in vain, and the beast's fangs attempted to close upon her tender skin!!

".....kyah~....save me~....hah..."

At that instant!!

"Hold it!"

He was appeared!!

And the old man of the dango shop,

"Wait a moment, Ferris. Didn't you describe the old man of a tea shop before, and not a dango shop?"

Hmm? Really?

"Yeah. If you actually want this thing to sell, you have to pay attention to details like these."

I-I see.

Alright, so the old man of the tea shop...

"Also."

What? You still have something to say? We're at an awesome moment right now, you know?

"Before you show off all the flashier stuff, you need a solid foundation for your story to build upon."

A solid foundation?

What do you mean?

"Ah, well, um...the most important thing right now is the portrayal of the beast. If you don't describe how frightening the beast is, the readers won't empathize with the characters' fear at all, right?"

Hmm, I see.

"Also, the daughter and the father aren't fleshed out at all...more like, do you even have a proper setting page for all the characters?"

Setting page? Do I need that?

"I don't really know, but I felt like I read somewhere that you need to make one...well, I'm not a writer, so I'm a bit sketchy on the details."

No, you've impressed me, Ryner.

I see.

So let's make this setting page.

First comes the old man.

Old man: Aged 43. Divorced his wife ten years ago. In the first place, when they met, they...

"Why is the old man first? And really, you don't need such a detailed background for the old man."

Hmm? Really?

"Well, it's a different story if the old man's going to play an important role later on...is he going to?"

No.

"Then you don't need it."

Hmm.

This is pretty difficult.

So, what should I do next?

"Ah~...well, the girl sounds like a side character, so the spotlight turns onto the beast. How are you imagining him?"

A malicious beast; the servant of the king of darkness, who tried to destroy the world!

"I see, I see. So, what's the king of darkness like?"

Of course, he's the atrocious fiend, the king of blackmail, Sion Astal!

"Huh, really? That despicable bastard, liar of the worst kind, Sion Asshole is the king of darkness?"

Of course!

You can't think of anyone else when you hear 'king of darkness', right? The Sion Dumbass who threatened to destroy dango shops must be the commander of all evil!

"S-somehow, I'm really pumped up at the prospect of writing this novel!"

I thought that you'd say that, my comrade in arms!!

"Alright, I'm sorta used to this conversation by now, so let's start insulting Sion...I mean, writing the novel!"

So, the description of the beast...

"What are you imagining, Ferris?"

Alright, I'll try drawing it out.

First come the bat wings.

"You really suck at drawing."

And the upper body of a gorilla.

"Hmm."

Lower body is that of a snake.

"Nice."

Pig ears.

"Ah, that's not bad."

And of course, his face is Sion's face.

"T-this is the best! Ah, wait a bit....ah geez, I'm laughing so much, it hurts my tummy......ah, let's make him crap all over the place."

Y-you're good, Ryner.

Alright, it's decided. Let's continue.

"...ah, okay, I-I'm beat...I think I'll die from laughter...."

Ryner was almost dying from fear, but the beast closes in upon him while crapping all over the place!

"Scary-!!?"

At that moment!

"Hold it!"

He was appeared!!

The old man of the tea shop heard the voice and,

"T-that voice...don't tell me...h-he has come! The hero told in legends came to save meeeee!!"

"He has a really explanatory tone, huh...whatever."

And the father saw one dashing man riding on a white horse.

Wrapped around his formidable body was the hero's armor and the hero's cloak, and a huge sword was sheathed was his waist.

And his face was beautiful enough to shock the entire world and make volcanoes explode.

Just from one glance, you can tell that he wasn't a mere human.

He was born after receiving all the love of the god of beauty.

Yes, he is the legendary hero who protects love and peace and dango-

"T-the great Ferris Eris has come to save us!!"

"....I see, so you're the hero...."

"Hahaha. Rest assured now that I have come! Girl of the tea shop, I will save you now!!"

And Ferris made the horse run.

At the same time, he drew his sword.

Even that series of actions was beautiful!

People watched him and were entranced; the beasts succumbed to his overwhelming beauty.

And his sword flashed!

"There!"

In an instant, the beasts disappeared.

"...this isn't building up at all, is it..."

And the hero got off his horse and wrapped his cloak around Ryner, who was stripped naked.

"Are you alright, girl?"

But Ryner could not answer.

Because she instantly fell in love with this beautiful hero <3

"T-that's disgusting...what kind of flirt does she have to be to fall in love so quickly?"

"Hmm? What's wrong, flirt[Ryner]?"

"Woah, stop writing weird alternate readings!"

But Ryner didn't say anything.

What should I do about the feelings I have for the beautiful, great Ferris?

I-I'll...accompany the hero in his journey!

Ryner said while blushing.

"Well, I don't think tea shop girls usually follow the hero in his adventures."

And despite the fact that she was naked, she embraced the hero!

"What kind of character is she!?"

"Wha....what are you doing, you slut[Ryner]!"

"And I told you to stop adding weird alternate readings!!"

But the girl's will was firm.

She's fine with being called a slut.

Even if she's treated like a servant or a vermin, she wanted to follow the great hero.

So, father, please forgive me!

"Of course! Make sure you work hard for the hero's sake."

"........what kind of world is this.........I can't do anything about this Ferris world....so someone stop this, please..."

And the hero nodded at that.

"It's alright. I'll stop the darkness from spreading in this world. So rest assured, old man, and keep on making delicious dango!"

"Yes, my hero! I believe that a great hero like you can do it."

"Hmm. But I need the legendary hero's sword to defeat the overlord Sion Dumbass...."

"Oh, are we finally going back to heroic fantasy now?"

Fufu, right?

The hero continued,

"Old man, do you have any idea?"

And the father of the tea shop folded his arms and sank deep into though for a while. Then he raised his face,

"I seem to recall hearing something like this. In the depths of the forest up north..."

"Oohh, it's really shaping up like that now. The fact that the old man of the tea shop knows where the legendary sword is kinda bugs me, but..."

"Within a cave behind a huge waterfall."

"Nice. Having a cave[dungeon] or two is one of the defining characteristics."

"Inside a dango shop open for business in the deepest parts of the cave."

".....wait wait wait, I feel like this conversation turning weird...."

"Apparently, the legendary sword was passed down the generations of dango masters."

"......huh.....well....have it your way...."

And right then, Ryner shouted in surprise.

"....."

And right then, Ryner shouted in surprise.

"Huh? Why are you writing the same sentence twice...ah, you're telling me to say my line, huh....hmm, what should I do...

F-father!? But the cave is infested with brutish beasts! Though the hero may have received the gods' blessing, it's still.......................................what, Ferris? Why are you looking at me with that surprised face?"

Y-you're pretty good at writing.

".........huh, you think that's good....don't tell me, you were actually trying to write and not just screwing aroun.......wait, why do you look like you're about to cry!? Ah, I take that back, I-I think your writing is pretty nice!"

R-really?

"O-of course! I feel like this is so interesting, it's definitely going to become a bestseller!"

Right?

Just as I'd expected.

I've always thought that I could write fantastically after reading many novels.

Fufufu.

Now Ryner, don't slack off.

We're continuing.

"O-okay."

The hero wore his confident smile as usual and said,

"No problem. All caves are child's play in front of me!"

"....w-wow~..."

"No matter what kind of beasts appear, I won't them lay a finger on you!"

"...y-yay~..."

"Come now, Ryner! Let's get that legendary sword!!"

"....yees.....teardrop."

Hmm? What's with that 'teardrop'?

"....huh? Ah, I tried to reflect how overjoyed she is at the prospect of accompanying the hero by having her shed tears of happiness."

Oh, you're good!

Alright! This is coming along nicely!

Let's proceed.

"....okay."

"Let's go!"

".......oh~ teardrop."

And the adventures of the hero Ferris and naked Ryner...

"Wait, I'm still naked!?"

Had begun!

"Giving me the cold shoulder again? Really? Is this story really going to proceed with the whole naked thing?"

Part two.

"Woah, part two just came out of nowhere!"

How much time has passed since then?

"Well, I don't really care, but why don't we stop here for now and have dinner...."

It's been a few months since their departure from the tea shop.

However, the malicious hands of the king of darkness continued to erode this world.

The world was filled with pitch black darkness and shrieks of agony and screams and er well things like that, anyways, it's becoming more and more dangerous!

".....yes, yes, you try your hand at complex sentence structures and just refuse to look at me. Let's just move on."

Little time is left until the destruction of the world.

There is no time.

Yes, there is no time!

"....I'd like some time for dinner, at least..."

"No, when I think about how many people are shrieking in pain while I eat, I just can't bear to eat."

"...well that's just sounds weird. I have no idea what you're trying to say."

And right then, the hero Ferris looked around.

Snow is piling, and the air is cold enough to cut through skin.

They were in a forest at the northern borders of the continent.

It was really cold.

He shrank back at the cold and turned around.

And he looked at Ryner with worry, who was walking energetically despite her weak legs.

"Are you alright, Ryner?"

"...."

"Are you alright, Ryner?"

".........ah, it's my line again?"

"Ahaha. You're a strange kid. There's no one but you and me here."

"......um, I-I'm fine, hero."

But the hero looked at Ryner in disbelief.

"But so much snow is falling. It's about time you put on some clothes."

"Huh!? She's still naked!? There's something wrong with her head! There's definitely something wrong with the woman's head!"

Something wrong with my head....

That might be what everyone says.

But it's alright.

I don't care about how others see me.

If I could let the great hero look at my naked body for even a second longer, I'd be fine.

And under his gaze, my body will heat up....enough to dissolve all the snow in the northern lands <3

Now, my great hero, look at me some more!!

Ryner said with flushed cheeks and began rolling around in the snow.

And Ferris laughed.

"Hahaha. As usual, you're such a slut, Ryner."

"Save me! Someone save me!! My mind is getting corrupted!!"

Ryner shouted while rolling around in the snow naked. She was obviously a pervert.

"....ah ugh....w-what's with this piece of work? I feel like it's going to traumatize me forever."

Leaving that aside.

"I've been left aside!?"

The two of them found the waterfall in the depths of the forest.

Ryner looked at that and said,

My great hero, I'd like to take a bath here.

"Don't say that. If you rush into the waterfall in such snowfall, you'll die."

But if my other choice is to show my body that's been dirtied to hell and back by our trip thus far, then I'd rather die! Thought Ryner.

".....I really don't like the descriptive phrase, 'dirtied to hell and back'."

But Ferris shook his head at that and pulled her body towards him.

"You don't have to worry about that, Ryner. No matter how you look, you're pretty ☆"

Oh <3

"What's up with this love scene that came out of nowhere? And the ☆s and <3s are really disgusting, you know."

Then, Ferris looked at Ryner and said,

"I love you, Ryner."

"....."

"I love you, Ryner."

".............."

"I love you, Ryner."

"Huuuuuuuuuuuh!? Am I supposed to write a reply!?"

"I love you, Ryner."

"I don't like this. I really don't like this."

"I love you, Ryner."

"....auhh....fine, I get it.....erm...."

"I love you, Ryner."

"Ah, yes, I love you too, Lord Ferris."

"But I don't want you getting all horny."

"I reaaaally want to murder this guy!!"

Even though the great hero pushed my screaming and crying self away, it's okay.

Recently, I've begun to like being insulted like that♪

"Just how much of a pervert am I!?"

Leaving aside Ryner who was both overwhelmed and delighted, that happened.

"That's not how you use 'both overwhelmed and delighted'!"

A beast appeared suddenly from the waterfall,

"Kuhehehehe! Die, hero!"

He threw the spear in his hands!

But because of the various bizzare acts that unfolded before his eyes thanks to the slut, the hero Ferris couldn't notice it!

Danger, great hero!!

"........ugh, I really don't like the reason for this sudden tense evelopment....'various bizzare acts that unfolded before his eyes'?....well, whatever...."

The roaring spear.

Ferris turned around immediately and tried to dodge it,

"Ugh, this is bad..."

But stopped there.

He couldn't make it.

He'll die.

That's what he thought.

But right at that moment.

It's dangerous, my great herooooooooooooooo!

"...and that's me? Don't tell me, I'm going to shield him from the attack?"

Ryner jumped in front of the hero while naked.

In an instant.

The spear closed in upon Ryner's stomach.

"Woah, I'm dead? I died from that, right?!"

It tore through her tender skin.

Gouged out her insides.

"W-wait, do you absolutely have to make it that explicit?"

Then, while entangled in her guts...stomach, intestines and even her heart,

"Gyaaaaaaaaaaaah, this is disgusting! Really disgusting!!"

The spear emerged from her backside.

Like that, Ryner fell onto the ground.

It was an almost fatal injury.

"No, it's definitely fatal! Obviously it's fatal!?"

The hero was shaking while he looked at that.

"....h-how dare you do that to my slut[Ryner]!!"

"Heeeey, that alternate reading is really out of place there.....hah....I don't even feel like pointing it out anymore...."

And the beast became cowering under the hero's menacing look.

"...became cowering..."

The beast spoke with a shaking voice.

"H-hih....spare me..."

But the hero's anger cannot be calmed.

"I ・ Won't　・ Forgive　・ You!!"

The beast attempted to run.

But Ferris raised up his hands and,

"HERO BEAM!!"

Instantly, a rainbow shot out from his eyes and engulfed the beast.

"It's not coming from your hands, but your eyes? Then what did you raise your hands for!?"

"Woaaaaaaaaah I've been beat!!"

Crash boom.

And, justice was win.

"......don't tell me, that was supposed to be an explosion just now?"

"Hmph, you simpleton. Let's move on."

He said, and the two of them proceeded into the cave....

"Waaaaaaaaaaait just a moment! Hey, I totally died just now, right? What do you mean, 'the two of them'?"

And Ryner, even with her guts spilling all over the place, followed the hero out of pure will.

"No, no, no, that's not how you fix it!! More like, if kids read this fairytale, they'll cry!?"

Ryner's words were in vain, and their harsh journey continued.

Ryner looked around the dark cave and said in a shaking voice,

My great hero....I'm scared of the dark....

Looking at the girl who was trembling in fear like a small animal, Ferris said kindly,

"It's alright. I think you're scarier with your guts spilling all over the place♪"

"That's exactly what I think! For the first time, we agree on something!!"

"Now, before you decay completely, let's move on."

"And I said, it's scary....teardrop."

"But still.....just like that Sion Dumbass, your heart and soul were corrupted from the moment you're born. Ahaha."

"........really, just who are you.....you're just doing whatever you want, huh...."

While they were doing that, the two of them reached the depths of the cave.

And found one dango shop. When Ferris arrived at the entrance, an old man appeared from within.

"We were waiting for you, Lord Ferris. And..."

Suddenly, theh old man turned towards Ryner and looked like he was about to cry,

"My daughter."

"He's the tea shop guy from before!?"

"Now, now, you must be tired from your journey. Great hero, please come in. Now, Ryner, stop spilling your guts all over the place and make some tea for Lord Ferris!"

".........okay. You're right. I'm sorry for spilling my guts all over the place.......uhh."

And the three of them drank tea for a while, tasting the joys of their reunion.

Delicious tea and three plates of dango.

The first plate was bean jam dango.

The second plate was tri-colored dango...

"Do we really need such detailed descriptions of the dango?"

At those words, the tea shop father glared at Ryner.

"You fool. This is the story's climax, you know?"

"Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat!?"

"Geez, you're such a girl. If you don't get it, just stuff in your guts and shut up. You already stink like a fish, you're such a disgrace before the great hero....."

"Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh, like a fish!? I thought I was beginning to decay!?"

But Ferris spoke over the father's words,

"Now, now, don't be so angry at her. She always stunk like a fish."

"And I told you, that's noooooooooooooot how you fix it!!"

And Ryner was both overwhelmed and delighte....

"And that's not how you use 'both overwhelmed and delighted'!!"

Ferris and the tea shop father looked at how happily she was talking nonsense and smiled kindly while nodding their heads.

"Am I being pitied? Am I being pitied!?"

However, the times of peace could not last.

The world is in trouble.

There is no time.

Ferris said with a serious expression,

"Old man, it's about time we get to the main point."

The old man nodded and stood up.

And he took out one sword from the shop,

"This is the legendary sword passed down our family for generations."

He said and presented Ferris with the sword.

However, it didn't look like the legendary sword at all.

A sheet of dust covered the cracked wooden sheath, and when he pulled out the sword, rust could be seen everywhere.

"I see....so you do know the fairytale formula, Ferris....this happens quite a lot. The legendary sword is all battered and torn up, and unless you bestow the gods' blessing or some dargon's breath on it, it won't regain its former strength...are you going for that kind of development?"

And the old man replied,

"Yes. I'm going for that kind of development."

"Don't just abbreviate it!"

"Then I'll go with the dragon's breath."

"Give the location, at least."

".............how about, 'if you put the sword into the flames of the fire dragon that lives in the mountain far east, the sword will revive'?"

"Why are you asking....well, anyways, something along the lines of that. Oh and, no dango shops this time."

"Of course."

"So why is the old man replying?"

And the two of them headed towards the far east.

"Ah, you're progressing the story already."

Midway.

When found a dango shop on their way and handed the legendary sword over to the shopkeeper, the sword regained its shine, and the hero said with satisfaction,

"Hmm, now we don't have to go to the fire dragon...."

"Hah!? Why did it suddenly turn out like that!?"

The hero looked at Ryner and said with a serious expression,

"I'm sorry, Ryner....I'm tired."

"Huuh? Tired? of what?"

"You don't even know that?"

"Well, if I could predict what was going to happen in this Ferris alternate dimension world, then I should be in the hospital....leaving that aside, what are you tired of?"

"Hmm. Isn't it obvious?"

"Obvious...? So, what is it?"

"I'm tired of writing this story."

"...d-don't just say it like that....you dragged me into this, and now you're quitting...."

But I'm really sick of it, really.

"Well, even if you say that twice....well whatever, so, what do you want to do?"

Let's go and have dinner.

"What about the story?"

Right then!!

The demon king Sion Dumbass who was at the central city, suffered from a flu that only affects idiots and died because he was an idiot.

It was an instant death.

The world became peaceful.

End.

♦♦♦♦♦

The instant that he finished reading such a book.

"......gwah."

Sion exhaled, almost vomitting blood.

And spoke with a weak voice, sounding like he was close to dying,

".......w-what am I supposed to do about this?"

Curse.

Curse.

Curse.

The most fearsome curse of all was cast on such a book.

It felt like that world was decaying, rotting and corrupted with the book at its center.

He thought that he soul was about to be sucked out of him.

He worked so hard today, and just wanted to finish off the day nicely, but the curse destroyed all of that.

Read and die.

He knew that, but...

"....why did I finish reading this...?"

And I'm really busy now...

Sion cursed himself for his own foolishness.

Then he realized that a piece of paper was slipped in after the last page of the book.

"Hm? What is it?"

He pulled out the sheet of paper and read its contents.

The following words were written,

To Chief Editor, Sion Asshole,

I'm sure that you're currently crying at the fortune of being the first to read the greatest masterpiece in this century.

You want to let others read this masterpiece, no, you want everyone in the world to read this.

Let's start making copies and publishing it! You might even be issuing such a declaration to your underlings.

I cannot repress a smile at the thought of your happy face at that time.

But I understand your excitement.

This book will sell.

It'll become a social phenomena, selling a hundreds of millions, tens of billions, and thousands of billions.

And after reading this book, the world will be moved to tears and begin destroying their weapons.

This one book will bring about world peace.

How splendid!

This is almost like a hero legend set in modern times!

Of course, the hero is me.

Don't you think that this is the real legend of the hero? Fufufu.

So, publish it as soon as possible.

Send the royalties to the authors Ferris Eris and Ryner Lute.

Great Novelist Ferris Eris

Man of Letters Ryner Lute

"Ahahahaha!"

Sion could only laugh at the letter.

♦

How much time has passed since then?

Ryner Lute and Ferris Eris walked the streets.

Ryner looked at the blond haired beauty beside him with sleepy eyes,

"Hey Ferris....I think it's pointless to walk by the bookstore every day."

However, she turned her emotionless eyes towards Ryner,

"What do you mean, pointless! Our masterpiece might get published one day! Don't you want to bear witness to that historical moment!?"

But Ryner sighed deeply.

"But I really don't think something like that is going to get published....even if Sion somehow managed to publish it, it's only going to be within Roland, you know? It's not going to come to Iyet."

But Ferris didn't falter,

"Fool. Such a masterpiece calls for popularity, I'm sure it's selling thousands of billions now! In fact, the whole world might be buried under those books."

Ryner looked at her,

"......if you really believe that then.....half the people would find you cute....the other...would advise you to get your head checked out...."

"Hmm. Anyways, your life ends here...."

"No, no, no, I belong to the 'cute' camp, you know? It's true gyeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

Ryner was sent flying towards the bookstore that the two of them passed by these few days.

The biggest bookstore in the town that Ryner and Ferris were in.

A notice board stood at the entrance.

"Hm? What's this?"

Ryner read the notice board while tumbling along the ground.

And the following words were written there,

"Best sellers from Roland finally make their way here!"

Beneath the notice board were two kinds of books - a red one and green one.....actually, picture books were piled up like mountains and were selling extremely well.

And these words were written at the side of the notice board,

Author Ryner Lute

Author Ferris Eris

"Woah, what? I-it really got published!? And it's selling like hot cakes!? H-hey, Ferris! Ferris Ferris Ferris!"

"Shut up. I'll finish you off right now, so just wait."

"Not that! The book! The book!! Has gotten published!!"

Ryner said and pointed to the mountain of books. Ferris turned and...

Widened her eyes.

"....y-you're right."

Her usually emotionless eyes sparkled slightly with a hint of happiness...

Well, that didn't matter right now.

Ryner stood up with a surprised face.

"A-a-a-a-are we filthy rich now?"

"Of course. We sold thousands of billions, right!?"

No way, Ryner wanted to point out, but since Ferris looked so happy, he didn't want to burst her bubble and get beaten up for his efforts.

"A-anyways, let's buy them first!"

And they bought the books.

But they were bothered by a few things.

First, there are two kinds of books - red and green.

And the author of the green book was Ryner Lute, while the author of the red book was Ferris Eris.

But this was strange.

Ryner was only playing the part of the tea shop girl, is that really enough to warrant a volume?

Also,

When they bought the books, they saw these slogans written on the notice board.

"Extremely popular amongst parents who have troublemakers as children"

"Voted no.1 by children"

"The best book that educates a child's mind"

Et cetra et cetra, the word 'child' was emphasized...

"I didn't think that the contents of the book would make children happy....in fact, they're more likely to cry...."

Ryner tilted his head, but Ferris smiled,

"Fufu, you don't know anything, do you? Kids nowadays are maturing faster, so they'll be happier with a realistic depiction."

"Really?"

"Hmm, of course."

Ferris nodded confidently.

Anyways.

Ferris bought the books and opened them up outside the bookstore.

Author: Ferris Eris was written on the red book.

She opened the book.

And Ryner peeked at it beside her.

Then, the picture book's story unfolded, accompanied by cute drawings.

♦♦♦♦♦

The Failure of the Gluttonous Princess

Somewhere, there lived a girl called Ferris.

(Picture of a cute, blond girl)

She loved dangos. She really, really, really loved them.

(Picture of Ferris drooling while looking at dango)

She ate dangos every day.

(Picture of Ferris eating nothing but dango)

She only ate dangos.

(Picture of Ferris eating dango like crazy)

Even when her mother got angry at her, she said "But I'll still eat dangos!"

(Picture of Ferris becoming thinner by the day, possibly due to an unbalanced diet)

Uuh, it's painful, but dangos are delicious.

(Ferris who wouldn't quite eating dango even if she looked half dead)

The God of dango suddenly struck out with anger, "I don't like naughty kids like you!"

(Picture of Ferris being knocked away)

And the gluttonous Ferris died young from having angered the God of dango.

(Picture of Ferris' tragic end)

End

♦♦♦♦♦

"This is scarier than the book we wroooooooooooooooooooooooooote and why is it selling so well!? More like, is it really alright to sell this to kids!?"

Ryner shouted.

But Ferris didn't respond.

Her body trembled.

"T-t-t-t-t-the God of dango is angry at me....just w-w-w-w-w-w-what should I do..."

"I-it's alright! This is just a picture book! It's just fiction!!"

"Awahwahwah"

Ferris sounded terribly shaken, and Ryner was taken aback at her behavior.

Nothing is going to get through her right now.

But he empathized with her.

Creepy contents and creepy illustrations.

It's even scarier because it looks like a picture book.

"S-sion, you bastard, doing such despicable things again...."

At that moment, he stepped on something.

Ryner looked down and saw a book.

Yes.

The green book that fell out of his hands at some point.

"Ugh...."

Ryner couldn't stop himself from groaning.

"...I-I won't read...."

The cover was a cute picture.

".....I-I don't care about the contents at all!"

Author: Ryner Lute.

".....ha! Sion wrote this, of course it's going to be boring. I don't need to read it. Ah, I wasted my money. I shouldn't have bought it...."

Ryner said, all while trying to pick up the book.

Even though he didn't want to read....

Even though he knew he's going to end up feeling disgusted....

Curiosity killed the cat!!

And the story began.

♦♦♦♦♦

The Story of the Sleepyhead

Somewhere, there lived a boy named Ryner.

(Picture of a lazy-looking black haired boy)

He loved taking naps, he really, really, really loved taking naps.

(Picture of Ryner jumping into bed)

He napped every day.

(Picture of Ryner sleeping)

He didn't wake up in mornings, didn't eat anything, didn't go to school, and didn't work. Afternoon naps are the best!

(Picture of Ryner continuing to sleep even after falling off the bed)

Even when his mother got angry at him, he said "But I'm really sleepy!"

(Ryner who grew thinner day by day due to insufficient nutrients)

Uuh, It's painful, but I don't want to wake up.

(Ryner who still slept even though he's half dead)

Ryner was shriveling, but the demon Sion Dumbass appeared right before he died!

(Picture of the demon Sion appearing before Ryner, who cannot move because he's dying from hunger. The light behind Sion is really irritating since it makes him look rather holy.)

Even though he's half dead and cannot move, the demon Sion forced Ryner to work more and more. No sleep for 2000 hours.

(Picture of Ryner, who looked like a skeleton below his head, being worked to his death)

And because the sleepyhead Ryner didn't move his body while he was still healthy, he died young.

(Picture of Ryner's tragic end and the demon Sion who laughed while trying to eat him)

End

♦♦♦♦♦

"Awahwahwahwah, h-he's serious about this!? He's reaaaaaaaaaaaaaally going to work me to death!? And he's going to eat me to the bone!? W-w-w-w-w-w-what should I do, Ferris!?"

Ryner said while half crying.

But Ferris only had one response.

"Awahwahwahwah"

"Awahwahwahwah"

By the way.

Leaving the two trembling people aside, the book was selling more and more copies.

It didn't sell thousands of billions....but it did sell millions.

It's a huge hit.

And the royalties went to the artist who drew the wonderful illustrations, Iris Eris....in other words, the two of them didn't know that all the money went into Ferris' sister's purse.

End