Boku wa tomodachi ga sukunai:Volume5 Hot Springs
After Yozora and Sena relaxed on the bench long enough to finally be able to move again, we left Yokoshima Wonderland, and moved over to the adjacent hot springs area called "Hot Spring Paradise".
The janitor who had to come clean up the mess they've made scolded them by saying, "You're not little kids anymore, you need to know when to take a break so you can enjoy your time here." It must've had some effect, because both Yozora and Sena kept quiet.
One of the reasons we came to the hot springs area was to relax a little, but my main priority was using the laundromat inside to clean the puke off my clothes.
I can't exactly get on the train with puke on me...
I rented a yukata, changed into it, and then threw my dirty clothes into a fully automated laundry machine before heading off for the hot springs.
"Alright, let's meet up at four o'clock, ok?"
After deciding on a time to meet up, the men and women went to their respective changing rooms.
Yukimura and Maria went with me.
"...Wait, what!? Maria!?"
I was shocked to see Maria merrily walking around behind me as though she were doing a little dance.
"Hmm?" said Maria with her head tilted to the side.
"No, don't give me “hmm”. Why are you going with us to the men's side?"
"'Cause it says girls 10 and younger can go into the men's bath!"
"Well, yeah, there's no problem age wise, but... Doesn't it make more sense to go to the women's side when there are other girls with you?"
Maria had a slightly hesitant look on her face as she said,
"Yozora and Sena both reek of puke. I don't want to take a bath with them."
I reflexively twitched and made a bitter smile in response to the destructive power of Maria's blunt statement.
She's as honest as ever, for better or worse.
Man, kids can be really harsh...
I bet even Yozora and Sena would get depressed if they heard her say that.
"Alright, that's fine I guess... Let's go to the men's bath then."
"Yay! I get to take a bath with Onii-chan!"
Maria said, showing me a brilliant smile.
And so, we reached the changing rooms.
The changing rooms, starring Yukimura Kusunoki.
...Do I really have to withstand that mental training again?
I almost wanted to cry as I carefully searched for a place we could change.
Luckily, nobody else was changing right now, so I didn't have to deal with everyone shooting strange looks at Yukimura in his maid uniform.
I managed to find a spot you couldn't see from the entrance to the changing rooms or from the door that led to the baths, that was a safe distance away from any other stalls that had other people's clothes in them, so we set up camp there and began changing.
Maria threw off her clothes and got naked in a flash.
She then tossed them into her basket, and said,
"Hurry up Onii-chan, let's go, let's go!"
"Y-you go on ahead. I'm kinda slow."
I then said to Maria, who started happily running off, "Ah, hey! You forgot your towel!" and threw a towel over to her.
"Make sure you wash up good before you get in the bath! And don't wear your towel in the bath either!"
"O~K! Time to swim~!"
"No it's not!"
Maria's feet went plip-plop before she disappeared into the baths.
...Now then... I think it's time for me to change too...
I snuck a glance over at Yukimura, and happened to catch him right as he'd taken off his apron.
As usual, that body of his is so thin and delicate I just can't see him as a guy.
Especially his waist... Why is it so thin?
I quietly took a step away from Yukimura, and undid the string on my yukata after making sure he couldn't see me.
As I did,
I replied with my back turned to him.
"I'm terribly sorry, but might you be so kind as to undo the button on the back of my uniform again?"
Apparently that button up by the back of his neck is hard to reach. He had me help him with it when we went to the pool too.
I undid the button, and saw the beautiful white skin on the nape of his neck that, like the rest of his body, looked nothing like a guy's, causing me to back away from him in a panic.
Ahh, I'm so nervous...!
I took off my yukata and underwear in a hurry, and quickly threw them into my basket.
I then grabbed a towel, and said,
"W-well then, I'll be off now!"
I took one last glance at Yukimura's face, and saw that he was blushing for some reason.
These hot springs were already pretty popular even before Yokoshima Wonderland was built, so it's no wonder that the baths in 'Hot Spring Paradise' were incredibly nice.
There were three large bathtubs along with a sauna, cold bath, jacuzzi, electric bath, and just about every other kind of bath you could imagine.
I needed to wash up first, so I grabbed a wooden tub off the pile of them sitting near the entrance, and made my way to the showers.
"Ah! Onii-chan, over here, over here!"
Maria, who had already washed herself off earlier, saw me walking towards the showers and waved me over.
I sat down next to Maria, and started washing myself with the shower's hot water from my head down.
I let out a breath of relief as I washed away the sweat and dirt from the amusement park.
And that's about as far as I got before I heard Yukimura's voice from behind me.
"Aniki. Allow me to wash your back."
I turned around and saw him standing there, naked.
Although technically he did have a towel covering him from the chest down to just below his waist.
"S-seriously, why do you cover your chest...!?"
"It's embarrassing to show my chest to others due to it not being manly like yours, Aniki..."
"Oh yeah, that's right..."
I'm pretty sure he told me that back in the locker room at the pool.
"Although, if you order me not to cover it, then I shall..."
"I'm not ordering you! Please, for the love of God, keep on covering it!"
I pleaded Yukimura, who'd been bashfully mumbling his words, to keep the towel on.
"Oh, I see..."
Yukimura made a face that looked a little upset.
"By the way, allow me to wash your..."
"I-I'm fine! I can do it myself!"
"There is no need to restrain yourself on my account."
I turned my back to Yukimura, and told him,
"I'm not restraining myself―― I just don't want you of all people to wash my back!"
......T-that might've been a little bit too harsh on him. I timidly turned around, and looked up at Yukimura's face again.
There were tears welling up in his eyes, and his face was filled with a look of sorrow so strong it felt like my heart was getting ripped out of my chest just looking at him.
"I see... Aniki has no need for one such as I. Now that it has come to this, I may as well cut open my stomach and end it all..."
Yukimura started to run away (my blood started really pumping as I saw that lovely butt of his that, just like the rest of his body, looked nothing like a man's) but I hurriedly called out to stop him.
"H-hold on―― Don't run away! Wash it for me―― I'd like it very much if you could wash my back for me!"
Yukimura turned around, and an absurdly cute smile rose to his face.
I turned my back to him again, unable to keep looking at that face of his.
"W-well? Come on! Hurry up and do it! H-here's the soap, and this is the shower!"
I shut my eyes tight so I wouldn't accidentally see Yukimura in the mirror, and then stuck my hands out backwards to give him the shampoo and shower head.
"Thank you for allowing me to receive your order. I shall put my heart and soul into serving you, Aniki."
Said Yukimura in an extremely cute voice, before starting to scrub my back.
I had the chairman wash my back once before, too, and honestly, I've gotta say that having someone else wash your back for you feels good.
However unlike the chairman's hard scrubbing, Yukimura's was a little weak, and at times, tickled.
"......Hn... Haa... Ngha... Hahh..."
...Yukimura sounded like he was really scrubbing with all he had, and I could hear his feverish... hell, sexy pants behind me.
No, no, wait, it's not sexy! It's not sexy at all!
He's just washing my back for me!
Yukimura's arms and chest would touch my back every now and then, and each time they did, I was assaulted by an indescribably good feeling.
But it's still not sexy! We're both guys. It's not sexy at all!
Yukimura's touch was, much unlike the chairman's hard muscles, incredibly smooth and soft. In fact, it was so much so, that I couldn't possibly imagine him being the same gender as me.
Especially his―― chest.
It would be much more fitting to call that faintly springy touch as one belonging to "breasts" rather than simply a "chest".
...Kh... Hang in there, oh sanity of mine...!
...I-I can't do it... I'm gonna go insane if he doesn't stop soon...!
I shut my eyes tight and prayed to myself in my head, "End already! End already!"
And as I did,
"Ohh, so this is what a dick looks like~"
Said Maria, who'd been sitting next to me, washing herself off, as she took the towel I had wrapped around my waist.
I opened my eyes by reflex and saw Maria right in front of me.
Maria stared at my crotch, seemingly very interested in it.
"Wow~ This is totally different from the one Rika showed me on her laptop~ That one was really scary, but Onii-chan's looks really nice!"
In what way!?
More importantly, having someone stare at me down there is pretty embarrassing, even if she was just a kid.
My body started to heat up due to the embarrassment.
"Hey~ hey~ Onii-chan, can I touch it?"
"No! And give me my towel back!"
I snatched my towel back from Maria, who'd been holding it out in the open, and put it back around my waist.
"I bet it would've been fun too..."
...Fun she says.
She can say the most ridiculous stuff at the drop of a hat, this girl.
"Hey~ hey~ Why do you have that weird thing?"
"Why...? And what do you mean, 'weird thing'...?"
Should I just tell her something similar to what you'd learn in a sex ed. class?
......Yeah, let's not do that.
It's too embarrassing to actually say it, even to a little girl. Also her sister Kate might get mad at me if I did that.
"...It's because that's just how guys are."
I gave her a quick non-answer, to which she nodded, and then,
"Then how come Yukimura doesn't have one?"
I let out a confused voice with a stupid look on my face, still not sure what Maria just said.
"Ahaha, Yukimura's a guy, but he doesn't have one, so weird~ So there are guys who have them and guys who don't, huh~"
"What the heck are you...?"
"It is on account of me still lacking much experience..."
I could see Yukimura's blushed cheeks and embarrassed expression in the mirror.
Uh, what do you mean, lacking experience?
What does experience have to do with this?
"Ohh~? So you don't have one if you're inexperienced~"
Maria sounded honestly curious.
No-no-no-no... Hahaha, but that doesn't make any- Wait-wait-wait.
"That is true."
"Then you'll grow one once you aren't inexperienced anymore?"
No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no, this still doesn't make any sense...
"I see~ Onii-chan really is amazing then, since he's experienced~"
"Yes. Aniki is truly an outstanding individual."
"Ahaha, I hope you can be like Onii-chan soon, Yukimura!"
"As do I. I shall work hard to do so."
"Daaaahhhhh!! What the hell are you saying!?"
I turned around behind me, having reached the peak of my confusion.
What I saw there, was Yukimura's figure.
He had his towel that he'd been using to wash my back in his hand, and thus, had nothing to hide his body with now.
So there was Yukimura, sitting there with one knee up.
His beautiful white skin, his dainty body, his chest with two slightly―― only slightly, budding mounds, and a waist that looked like it'd snap if you hugged him too hard.
And then, in the middle of that waist, in the space between his left and right legs――
What should have been there, was not.
Or rather, in this case, perhaps it would be better to say that what should not have been there was naturally not.
He. Did. Not. Have. One.
"Aniki, this is embarrassing."
Yukimura gently hid her chest.
Don't you think there's something more important to cover than that chest so tiny people would believe you if you told them it was a man's!? Is what I would have liked to shout, but all I could do was stand there with my mouth opening and closing like some kind of fish.
...I thought back, really thought back on some things.
When Yozora, Sena and I first met Yukimura, we took her claim that she was a man at face value, and never went to actually check if that was the case. (Not that you'd normally ever do this anyway)
Back when we went to the pool, and even in the changing room this time, I was unable to look right at her as she was changing.
I just kept telling myself "He's a guy. He's a guy. He's a guy. He's a guy." without ever actually checking to see.
A high school boy that looks just like a beautiful girl―― Why on Earth did I ever believe something like that actually existed?
How many times did I tell myself stuff like "I just cannot think of him as a guy," or "He looks exactly like a girl, no matter how you look at it," I wonder.
If something looks exactly like a beautiful girl, then chances are pretty good it really is a beautiful girl.
Let's think about this calmly, and rationally.
There's no way someone this cute could be a guy――...
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