Boku wa Tomodachi ga Sukunai: Volume 3 The Silent Phone
 The Silent Phone
The third day of summer break.
"Hey, you guys. Why didn't any of you come yesterday?"
I, who had just arrived in the clubroom around 3 o'clock, asked my fellow club members.
By the way, today both Yozora and Sena got here earlier than me.
"Kodaka-senpai, were you lonely because you weren't able to meet Rika?"
Said the girl wearing a white robe over her school uniform with a little smile on her face for some reason.
Rika Shiguma, Freshman.
She's apparently a genius, though you'd never guess it by how crazy she is about ero doujinshi... especially how she acts like an insane person when it comes to mecha x mecha stuff.
She's one of the members of the Neighbors Club.
Yukimura was also in the room.
Kobato was being a hikkikomori as usual, and Maria wasn't here.
"I wasn't really lonely or anything, just wondering..."
"Hmph, I had things to do yesterday."
Said Yozora unconcernedly.
"Stuff to do huh... Guess there's no helping that..."
Next was Sena (whose eyes were bloodshot for some reason) who said something.
"I was really busy yesterday too."
"I figured I'd reach the ending soon and then go to the clubroom, but it ended up taking four more hours than I thought it would. It was a really moving ending though, so it evens out. That scene where Mikan scores a goal was just so..."
Her eyes started to water up, and she sniffled her nose a bit.
I'm not really sure, but I guess she got so involved in her game she didn't come here.
"I'll lend it to you sometime, so you better play it Kodaka. You'll be wasting your life if you don't."
"...Sure, if I feel like it."
Now that I think about it, I got the Masaru (the protagonist's guy friend) end in that "Tokimemo" game she lent me (made me take home) and never played it again.
"Also, the theme song is super good. We should make it our national anthem! When you start the game again after finishing once you can totally feel how it connects to the last scene, and-"
"B-by the way!"
I quickly tried to change the subject, since if I don't stop her now who knows how long I'll have to put up with her going on and on about her galge.
Sena made an annoyed look on her face.
Yozora looked over here too (as she put on a face that looked like she thought Sena's ramblings were annoying as all hell, and quietly reached out for her fly swatter).
Rika and Yukimura both looked over at me too.
"To make sure nobody ends up coming here and killing time when nobody else is going to show up, I think we should come up with a way for us to know when everyone else is coming."
"...Hmph. You may be right."
Yozora gave her approval of what I suggested.
"Not a bad idea considering it's you, Kodaka." said Sena.
"So, what specifically should we do?"
"Eh? Hmm, I'm not sure..."
I didn't really think it out farther than that.
"What about using a BBS on the web? We can get one for free, right?"
I threw out the first thing that came to mind.
"Rejected." "No way."
Yozora and Sena said at the same time.
"You hardly even thought about it!! Why can't we use one!?"
Yozora and Sena both made faces that showed a deep disgust from the bottom of their hearts.
"...It's my personal rule to not use the internet for anything other than researching things and shopping."
That was kind of unexpected, but at the same time maybe it wasn't.
"That's how I do it now...... I'll never do that again."
Yozora said, with a sad little look on her face.
"...I won't bother asking what exactly it was that you did."
Yozora gave me an honest thanks.
She must really regret whatever it is that she did.
"I've had bad experiences with them before too."
"...Ahh... Just remembering it pisses me off! Those guys... that damn 'Yasuo' and 'Parko' and 'rikiya' and 'Mai-tan(*´Д`*)HaaHaa'...! I hate that damn moderator who banned me from that one fansite because he thought I was a troll too! Those assholes can all go die!"
"...Did you get into a fight with them on some BBS or something?"
"I had to, those damn morons called my lovely Natsumi a dumbass muscle-brain! Like hell I'd let them get away with that! You know, Natsumi might seem like that, but she's actually really delicate!"
Sena was getting louder and louder.
I don't have a clue what you mean if all you tell me is "she might seem like that".
The one thing I can say for sure is that it's some character from a galge.
"Well, people are going to have their own likes and dislikes. Not much you can do about it..."
"Haa? That's fine if you keep it to yourself, but if you're gonna make fun of Natsumi in front of a fan of hers like me, that's the same as a declaration of war! If someone does that, then all I can do is get them to shut up and admit how stupid they were, or die trying!"
It's not like I don't get where she's coming from, but she gets angry way too easily.
"...My battle still isn't over with those damn morons... If I ever meet them in real life I'll kick the crap out of them!"
"A-anyway, BBS's are a no go, right!?"
I interrupted Sena who was quickly reaching critical levels.
"Then how about that thing... nixi. We can send messages to each other without any worries that way, right?"
nixi is a social networking service, and you can use it to write stuff that other people can read and comment on... At least, that's what I think it's like anyway.
Since you can keep the things you write limited to certain people, it'd be a good choice for us all to use to communicate with each other... I think.
"Eh, Kodaka you're on nixi? Then give me an invite." said Sena.
nixi runs on an invite-only system, and thus you can only join if an existing member invites you.
"No, I'm not, but..."
"Hmph, like hell I'd ever join that site."
Yozora looked me in the eyes and gave a reply that was full of pride for some reason.
"Rika isn't on that site either~"
"Neither am I."
Rika and Yukimura both said.
That makes sense, nixi is based on the assumption you have friends to invite you after all...
"So we can't even join nixi..."
A heavy atmosphere filled the room.
"But, you know, nixi isn't the only SNS out there! We just have to pick one that doesn't need an invite!"
I said, but then Rika stopped me.
"Hold on Senpai. If Rika asks her acquaintances in the game industry, I think we can get an invite to nixi."
"Really? Then let's do that..."
"That's fine with me, but..."
Rika said, with her head tilted in confusion,
"But why can't we just use our cells to talk to each other rather than going out of our way to use something else?"
Yozora, Sena and I all stood shocked.
"Cells... Are you talking about cell phones?"
I asked, still stunned.
"Huh? Well, yeah."
The wild idea that a cell phone could be used for anything other than calling home hadn't come within a mile of my thought process.
"...I see, cell phones... Rika... You really are a genius... That's an amazing idea."
"Yeah... I never even considered doing that... So cell phones aren't just for looking up karaoke shops... Rika Shiguma... it would seem I have no choice but to recognize your genius..."
"...It's nice to hear you all think my idea is so good."
Yozora and I showered Rika with praise, calling her a genius and stuff, but Rika looked like she was a little creeped out by it.
"Anyway, why don't we exchange addresses for now?"
Rika took out a cell phone from her lab coat's pocket.
I followed her lead and opened my bag, taking out the cell phone buried within its depths.
I bought it when I got into high school. It's a folding type that doesn't have any particularly amazing functions to it.
By the way, both Kobato and I have had cell phones since we were in grade school, and I'm currently on my 3rd one (I bought my 2nd in middle school).
I gave a quick look at my call log, and every call and text I got was from "Home" and every one that I sent was to "Little Sister".
"Here, I took mine out too."
Yozora hesitantly showed her phone to me.
There wasn't a single ornament or strap on it; it was just your run of the mill black cell phone.
By the way, it seemed like Yozora's phone was at the bottom of her bag too, so it took her a while to take it out.
"Okay, send your infra-red rays this way please."
Rika said, and started casually hitting buttons on her phone.
"Eh- I-infra-red rays???"
Yozora confusedly stared at her phone's LCD, as did I.
What's she talking about?
Is she really trying to say these little phones can shoot out infra-red rays?
"...I do feel like I've heard people talk about how more recent phones are able to exchange data via infra-red rays... So that was all true... Hrmm... W-which is it?"
Said Yozora as she furled her brow while hitting buttons on her phone.
"You're kidding me... When did phones get that advanced..."
Rika looked at me and my astonishment as though I were some kind of Neanderthal.
"Here you are."
The one who said that and turned their phone towards Rika was... Yukimura.
"Ah, thanks Yukimura."
Rika and Yukimura pointed their phones at each other for about 2 seconds and pulled them back soon after.
"Yes! Yukimura address get!"
"I have confirmed yours as well."
Said Rika and Yukimura.
An utterly shocked expression rose on Yozora's face.
"I-it can't be, you're done already...? That quickly...?"
"Oh man... Kids these days are something else... I can barely keep up..."
"Ahh... So this is the virtual generation of this digital world we live in... I hear everything is like a game to them..."
"...This must be what people mean by children who don't know the meaning of hard work..."
"That's quite a lot to say considering you're only a year older than us, Senpai..."
Rika made a pitiful face at the three of us shaking in awe...
"People like Aniki who only rely on their own strength don't pay heed to things such as cell phones, do they?" Yukimura said.
...Actually, high-tech girl Rika aside, the fact that even Yukimura can easily use infra-red rays was simply shocking.
I figured he was the type to be bad with technology.
Though, now that I think about it, he didn't seem to be confused at all when we were all playing that "Romancing Saga" game...
"Arghh.... I don't get it! Besides, it's weird for people to know how to use this machine when they don't have any friends! Kodaka! I'll just have to do it normally so tell me your address."
Yozora finally gave up on the infra-red rays.
"Okay. I'm pretty sure that'll be faster for me too."
Uhh, my address is............ about 30 seconds later, I managed to pull up my phone number and e-mail address on my phone's screen.
"Here." I said as I showed it to Yozora.
"Hm.........Ah, went too far. Mu..."
Yozora clumsily fished her way around her phone's buttons, trying to enter my address.
"...Hrmm... This is a pretty complex address you've got here..."
"Yeah, it's because I never changed it since I bought my first phone..."
"......Hm... where are the special characters..."
After a full two minutes, Yozora finished entering my e-mail address and phone number.
Yozora wiped her forehead, and let out a sigh as though she'd just completed some insanely difficult task.
"O-okay... I'll send you something now Kodaka. An e-mail. An e-mail using my cell phone."
Yozora nervously pushed a few buttons, and then hit send.
About a second later, the words "Receiving Mail" popped up on my screen.
Then, 2 seconds later it went "Ding di~ng" as the default ringtone played.
"I got it!"
"You got it!?"
Yelled Yozora in a happy voice.
The e-mail was titled "E-Mail" and "E-Mail" was written in the message itself as well.
Uhh, I guess this is Yozora's e-mail address.
I went and added "Yozora Mikadzuki" to my contacts list.
"Ohhh... My first address from someone other than my family...!"
This is almost like, some kind of momentous occasion or something!
Yozora made a surprised face after hearing what I just said.
"I am? What about the addresses of the people from the schools you were at before...?"
"...I never put them in. At the farewell party there were some guys who said "Gimme your address later," but I never did end up exchanging addresses with any of them..."
Yozora had a look of sympathy in her eyes, and then murmured,
"Oh, I see... so I'm your first non-family address..."
A tender smile rose to her face for a single moment.
And then she said, triumphantly for some reason,
"By the way, I've never even added my own family's addresses before. You're the very first ever, Kodaka."
...I don't know what you want me to say to that, Yozora.
"Muu~. I wouldn't have minded teaching you how to use the infra-red rays, but when Rika sees you two having so much fun it feels like we're the ones who lost here..."
Rika said with an unsatisfied look on her face. Then, all of a sudden,
"Hmph, it's just a stupid cell phone."
Said Sena, who had been unusually quiet up until now, as though she were spitting the words out.
"...? What are you mad about?"
"I'm not mad!"
Said Sena, who seemed to be in a bad mood.
"If you say so... Anyway, come on, give me your address too."
I said, which only made Sena look even more angry.
She mumbled with her lips pursed.
"I don't have a cell phone!"
Sena yelled at the top of her lungs, which startled Rika and Yukimura.
"O-oh, you don't have one..."
Sena glared at me and said,
"Just so you know, I'm not jealous of you or anything!! It's not like not having one is a problem for me, and even if I did have one it wouldn't do me any good! Cell phones are what those annoying retard girls in my class use! A noble like me doesn't have any use for one!"
"...Uh-huh... O-okay. Yeah, there's plenty of people who say they don't need a cell phone, right?"
"Exactly! Forget a cell phone, I don't even need a normal phone. No matter where they are or what they're doing, lowly commoners should be able to gratefully accept the angelic voice of a goddess like me!"
"Uh, that's a little bit..."
as I started talking,
Ring ring ring... all of a sudden the phone in my hand started ringing.
I fumbled the phone around and saw a number I didn't know on the screen.
I figured I might as well answer it.
" 'It's me.' "
I heard a voice from the phone and from behind me.
I turned around and saw that the one who called my phone was Yozora.
" 'Enter my phone number into your contacts.' "
"Ah, yeah okay."
Talking on the phone with somebody right in front of you is so weird.
Yozora kept on talking to me over the phone like that for some reason.
" 'Since we just got it all set up, let's talk over the phone for a while.' "
"Eh... Sure, I guess."
" 'Good. Then let's talk about dinner last night. What did you eat, Kodaka?' "
"Uhh, what did I eat..."
As I was thinking I happened to look over at Sena again, who looked even more pissed off than she was before to the point I could almost see her veins popping out.
"Y-you two! Who gives a damn about what you ate yesterday!? Why do you have to go out of your way to talk about that over the phone now!?"
" 'Shut it, Meat. Can you not even shut yourself up while people are trying to talk on the phone?' "
Said Yozora, waving her hand at Sena telling her to go away.
" 'Still, these cell phones are quite handy. We can even talk when we're not together.' "
"Then use them when you're not together!!"
Yozora completely ignored Sena and continued,
" 'We can let everyone know when we're coming to club with them. Also, let's talk about all of our plans via e-mail from now on.' "
Sena was about to burst into tears.
Yozora still kept on talking too, although this time it was with a much quieter voice that you could barely hear.
" 'By the way, about my dinner last night, I had meat. Specifically, it was curry with chicken meat, and the meat was incredibly tender and tasted so good.' "
She carefully made sure to only say the word "meat" at a normal volume.
"Uu~... What are you talking about...!?"
" 'Something that has nothing to do with you Meat. The store I went to didn't have just chicken meat, but also had pig meat, cow meat, and a bunch of other stuff that was so cheap I think we should all meet up there sometime. I'm sure you'll all love the meat they have th-' "
"Gaaaahh! Shut up, stop saying meat!!!!"
Sena roared all of a sudden, and took my phone away.
Sena brought my phone to her mouth and then yelled at the top of her lungs,
Yozora cringed and pulled the phone away from her ear.
Sena shoved my phone back into my hands, and told Yozora "Go die!" before running out of the clubroom.
"...God damn, stupid piece of meat..."
Yozora ended the call while holding one hand to her ear.
"You really know exactly what to do to piss Sena off, don't you..."
I have to admit, I was a little impressed by it.
On the bus and train ride home, and even after I got home, I kept opening my cell phone and looking at my contact list.
After Sena ran out, I exchanged addresses with Rika and Yukimura (I even learned how to use the infra-red rays).
Up until now I've only ever had home, Kobato's cell, and Dad's work phone in there, so my contact list easily doubled today.
Crap... I can't stop smirking...
That night, I went to sleep in a good mood,
Ring ring ring...
The phone ringing woke me up.
The phone that was ringing wasn't my cell, but rather our home phone.
I checked the time using my cell I left near my bed, and saw that it was just past 2 in the morning.
"...Who the hell is calling at this time of day..."
I thought about ignoring it, but I figured it might've been one of dad's overseas contacts so I got out of bed to answer it.
I headed downstairs while rubbing my sleepy eyes and picked up the phone.
"...Hello, this is Hasegawa speaking."
It felt like I was being a little quieter than usual.
A voice that sounded like the person talking held the receiver right next to their mouth and yelled as loud as they possibly could rang through my ears.
I reflexively pulled the phone away from my ear and cringed.
W-what the hell...!?
As I thought that,
.....They hung up.
"...What the hell, a prank call...?"
Still pissed off at the annoying person who'd make a prank call in the middle of the night, I went back to bed. However, right as I was about to fall asleep again, the phone rang again.
I'm ignoring it.
I told myself that and closed my eyes, but the phone didn't stop ringing even after 20 seconds had passed.
Oh yeah, I never set the answering machine...
Annoyed, I got up again and went downstairs to pick up the phone.
Even I could tell how pissed off I sounded.
I heard a shriek from the receiver.
Huh, where have I heard that voice before...
I asked again, and then heard someone gulp and say,
She was obviously nervous, talking as fast as she could.
"...Eh, Sena?" I asked.
"H-huh? Is this Kodaka?"
I could hear Sena breathe a sigh of relief over the phone.
"You idiot! Geez, don't scare me like that you idiot! Your voice is scary idiot!"
Not holding back on the insults are we?
...This doesn't even make any sense.
"Do you have any idea what time it is right now...?"
"H-hey, more importantly, Kodaka!"
Sena rambled on, perfectly ignoring my complaints.
"What kind of cell did you get?"
"...What kind? It's just a normal one..."
I answered, unsure of what she was asking.
"That. Is. Not. What. I. Meant! It's gotta have the name of the company or a serial number on it somewhere!"
"Eh... The company is ∀Ｕ. I don't know what kind it is."
"Then find out."
"Just do it!"
I put down the receiver and went back up to my room and flipped on the lights.
I took my cell in my hands, and found something that looked like a model number.
"Uhh, it's a M61b, I guess."
"An M61b by ∀Ｕ?"
"Yeah." I could hear her writing something down.
"Okay, I got it. See you later."
Announcing the end of her business she quickly hung up.
Just what in the world...
The next day.
Just before noon I got an untitled message from Yozora that said nothing other than "2 o'clock." so I sent a mail to Yozora, Rika, and Yukimura, my own mail titled "Today", that said "I'll be there around 2 o'clock too."
After I finished lunch, I left home so I'd get there around two.
While I was on the bus, I got a mail from Rika titled "Waiting Naked" which said "I'll be waiting for you naked, Kodaka-senpai♥ Ah, you just imagined Rika naked didn't you? Senpai you pervert♥"
"...Is she retarded?"
I gave her a quick reply of "retard".
A few minutes later yet another mail from Rika came.
The title was "Ass"... pushing the line with that one.
It read: "By the way, Yozora-senpai is totally naked too (*丿丿)kya~ As proof, I've attached an image of Yozora's cute little butt for you."
I let my voice slip in surprise, but after taking a good look at it I could see it was just a picture of her elbow.
...How old is she? 12?
Right after that, I got a mail from Yozora that said "That was Rika's arm just now." in the title field and nothing in the actual body. She must've been flustered when she wrote it. I also got another weird mail from Rika that came at nearly the same time as Yozora's with the title "Iyan♥" that said "Yozora-senpai hit Rika's butt with her fly swatter, Rika can't take it anymore s-stop itttt~~♥"
I sent Yozora a mail that said "I know." and ignored Rika.
I then got another mail, this time from Rika's laptop, with the title "The Truth" that read "Eh? Yozora-senpai, why are you taking Rika's panties off? Ahn~ I can't stand it, this is too embarrassing! Ahh, Don't lick me down thereee! I can't stop twitching each time I feel it! Yozora-senpai then whispered into the moaning Rika's ear, 'Here? Do you want it here? You dirty little girl.' She then gently blew on Rika's ears which caused Rika to lose all the strength in her body and (etc.)" I was reading her stupid mail, but the bus reached the school so I got off without finishing it.
Today was as hot as ever.
I entered the clubroom, where Yozora and Rika (who were obviously not naked) and Yukimura were waiting.
Yozora looked exhausted as she lay on the sofa.
Yozora pointed at Rika, and turned only her face to me as she said,
"Watch out Kodaka... she's, a freak..."
She barely managed to get even that out.
"Yeah, well... I already know that." I said.
As for the freak in question, she was currently typing away on her laptop.
It looked like she was writing a novel.
"Ah, Kodaka-senpai! Rika just recently discovered that yuri might not be all that bad! Rika thinks she might be okay with anything as long as it's erotic!"
"You're sure full of energy..."
I sat on the sofa, pitying Rika who seemed like she was about to launch herself into space.
"I have prepared tea."
Yukimura handed me a glass of barley tea.
I thanked Yukimura and happily took the drink from him.
Glug glug... I gulped the whole thing down at once.
...It wasn't hot or cold, just lukewarm tea.
"Would you like another?"
"Eh? Yeah, sure."
I took another glass of tea from Yukimura.
...It was warmer than before, but I still gulped it down pretty quickly.
"Here you are, Aniki."
"Thanks. Ah! That's hot..."
The third cup of tea was very hot, and not something I could just gulp down.
I looked at Yukimura, who was looking at me as though expecting something.
He was probably trying to imitate how Mitsunari Ishida gave Hideyoshi Toyotomi a cup of warm tea, then a slightly hot cup, and then a relaxing hot cup of tea to drink.
"...Umm... Mitsunari was a pretty thoughtful guy."
"It is an honor to receive your praise, Aniki."
I praised Yukimura, and he smiled bashfully.
"...But I still think cold barley tea is best. I won't let that one go."
"Is that so..."
Yukimura got a little depressed.
While relaxing and slowly drinking the hot tea from Yukimura, the door to the clubroom flew open all of a sudden.
"Heh heh, so you're all here, lowly commoners! Your goddess has come to you!"
It was Sena who opened the door.
"Ahh, hey." I said while sipping my tea.
Yukimura was stone faced, as usual.
Even Yozora, who'd usually make fun of her, only gave her a little glance as if to say she couldn't care less.
"You're letting the cold air out, can you close the door now?"
Rika coolly said, while still typing on her keyboard and not even looking over at Sena, to which Sena replied "Ah, sorry..." and quietly closed the door.
"I'm gonna get some sleep."
Yozora crossed her arms and closed her eyes.
"Uuu... W-why are you all so lifeless!?"
Sena ground her teeth, annoyed, and then said,
"I wonder, will you be able to stay like that after you see this!? Here, look at it Yozora!"
Sena quickly walked over to Yozora and held out a cell phone as though it were Mito Koumon's seal case.
"Heh, what do you think now? I asked Papa yesterday and he bought it for me!"
Sena said with the face of a delighted child.
Yozora opened her eyes a little, and then closed them again, uninterested.
"Huh, isn't that the same as mine?"
Sena's model matched the one I had. It was even the same gold color as mine.
"O-ohh... it is? W-what a coincidence!"
Sena's face turned a little red.
"Uh, no, not really..."
You called me in the middle of the damn night and asked me about it... before I could say that,
"...the same as Kodaka's?"
Yozora angrily said, and glared at Sena's cell phone.
"Hehe." Sena chuckled as though she'd just won some battle.
"Anyway, come on let's exchange addresses! Come on, hurry!"
I took out my cell phone.
Yozora groaned as she looked at and compared our phones.
I got ready to use the infra-red rays I learned about yesterday.
"By the way, do you know how to do it this way?"
"Of course!" Sena said triumphantly and pointed her cell at me.
We quickly exchange addresses.
Sena had a big grin spread across her face as she stared at her phone's LCD.
"Haha... Here Yozora, I'll even do it with you."
"I have no need for your address."
Sena got caught off guard by Yozora's refusal.
"Hey! I went and bought one so just tell me your address!"
"...Do you want my address that much?"
"I-it's not like I want it or anything! I don't want to know it at all, but I figured I'd let you exchange with me since we're in the same club! You should be grateful!"
"I see, thank you. I'll make do with your feelings alone."
"I can't call you using my feelings alone!"
Yozora looked at Sena with her eyes full of disgust.
"...Hmph, making such a greedy face... look at this bitch. If you want it so badly then prove it to me."
"Prove it...? Ah, I'm not going to lick your feet, got it~? Uuu~ Fine, forget it, stupid Yozora!"
Sena ran out of the room with a few tears in her eyes.
"...She gives up so quick..."
Whispered Yozora, who looked just a little bit sad.
After Sena left, Yozora and I began reading like we always do.
About 15 minutes later, I got a message on my phone.
...it was from Sena.
"I'm gonna send that idiot Yozora a bunch of spam mail so tell me her address (^_^)"
"...So this is the first mail you send me...?"
And on top of that, Yozora, who was sitting next to me, peeked at it.
"...That stupid Meat..."
A smile found its way to Yozora's face for some reason.
"...Kodaka, let me see Meat's address. I might as well just tell her what mine is personally..."
...It was roughly 30 minutes later when Sena came running back into the clubroom, half in tears, to talk to us about a bunch of mails from an unknown address she kept getting that simply said either "Death" or "Curse".
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